10-07-03, 01:22 PM
| #1 (permalink) |
| Morning  Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: poop
Posts: 19,388
| U guys see this site?? http://www.ishkur.com/features/music/index.htm# Epic Trance: Epic Trance is the gateway genre into the world of rave for most people, so if you have any form of music to blame for raves hitting the mainstream, this is it. Right here. And that, my friends, really, truly, terribly sucks. There must be a word to describe the pain one feels when witnessing (or hearing, rather) something once pure and brilliant completely sold down the river. Epic trance is not really trance, per se. It is powdered, sugar-coated pop schmaltz draped over trance for easy digestion by giggling highschool cheerleaders and parasitical meatmarket trendy types who would never think to even blink at trance in its raw incarnate. This is the musical equivalent of drowning a meal in ketchup so you can't taste the original flavour anymore.  Tech House: You'd think that a hybrid genre combining the best qualities of House and Techno would be totally rad, but it's not. In actual fact, Tech House comes out mostly as a dull, monotonous drone (something Tech House was the undisputed king of until only recently, when the technique of making boring music was surpassed by the pretentious Brit House scene calling itself only "progressive"), with barely enough going for it to make it interesting. It's like it decided to combine the worst qualities of Techno and House. Why the hell it would do that, I don't know. But it's been around, like, forever, and people keep making it, so someone somewhere has to be listening/buying/dancing/spinning all those Tech House records. I have yet to find anyone though (Tripwire, shut up). but what if it is riped sick?
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10-07-03, 01:26 PM
| #2 (permalink) |
| Morning Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: poop
Posts: 19,388
|
Epic House: Pretty interchangeable with Eurodance and Epic Trance, except for one idiot feature: the abject rape and decimation of fine 80s tunes and classic ballads by making trite, derivative "dance" mixes of them. Stupid. Just stupid stupid stupid. Listening to these tunes makes you yearn for the originals way more than you'd ever want to dance in a club to them. From "Total Eclipse of the Heart" to "Keep Me Hanging On" to a cutesy version of the Hamsterdance song (yes, I said HAMSTERDANCE, fuck dammit. Go P2P for it yourself, and brace yourself for the horror of horrors). If there is any redeeming feature of Epic House that exists, I haven't seen it yet. This genre is absolutely shameless and without remorse. It is a gimmicky vehicle for cheap radio one hit wonders through upgraded nostalgia, and is completely devoid of originality, substance and value whatsoever. Whoever makes this shit should be shot. -- |
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10-07-03, 01:36 PM
| #4 (permalink) |
| Falling down the stairs  Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Da Sawdust Joint
Posts: 2,406
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Disco House AKA Gay Disco House Of course House wasn't going to leave Disco alone. Even if every track samples the same riff from Change - "The Glow of Love". This is easily the style of music that has the most fun. If there was an official gauge of how much fun something is, Disco House would score off the chart. If there was a country in the world called Funia, Disco House would be its national anthem, as well as the name of its capital city. Everyone would be free, easy, super and gay (that's gay as in happy and fun, not gay as in lame and stupid). I was once walking down the street late one night and a hooker called to me from the curb, asking me if I was looking for some fun. "No thanks, Miss," I replied, pulling out a pair of headphones. "I've got Disco House, the most fun there is." She nodded completely in agreement. "Word. Be on your way, then."
__________________ And Shepherds we shall be For thee, my Lord, for thee. Power hath descended forth from Thy hand Our feet may swiftly carry out Thy commands. So we shall flow a river forth to Thee And teeming with souls shall it ever be. In Nomeni Patri Et Fili Spiritus Sancti." If all DJ's were a big family, Fester would be the crazy uncle that nobody talks about. |
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10-07-03, 01:39 PM
| #5 (permalink) | |
| Morning Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: poop
Posts: 19,388
| Quote:
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10-07-03, 01:47 PM
| #7 (permalink) |
| Fawkin Sowx Keed  Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: RI/MA
Posts: 9,920
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I saw the old version of this site, was genius then and is only more so now. French House: "If anything of value has ever come from France, it's this music right here. At this point, you can't NOT deny the genius that is Thomas Bangalter. He is the only reason why the world does not sack France." |
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10-07-03, 01:57 PM
| #9 (permalink) | |
| I got The Triceps  Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: dont hate
Posts: 3,482
| Quote:
 we need to have a gay house party very soon. i will host. bring many gay records. | |
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