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vicman

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I hope no one get offended by any of these

>An Israeli doctor says "Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can

>take a kidney out of one man put it in another and have him looking for work

>in six weeks".

>

>A German doctor says, "That's nothing, we can take a lung out of one person

>put it in another and have him looking for work in four weeks."

>

>A Russian doctor says, "In my country medicine is so advanced we can take

>half a heart out of one person put it in another and have them both looking

>for work in two weeks."

>

>The American doctor, not to be outdone, says, "You guys are way behind,we

>just took a man with no brain out of Texas, put him in the White House and

>now half the country is looking for work."

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Osama bin Laden found a bottle on the beach and picked

it up. Suddenly, a female genie rose from the bottle and with a smile said "Master, may I grant you one wish?" "Do you know who I am? bin Laden said menacingly, "I don't need anything from a woman except obedience. Now get out of my sight."

The genie pleaded "But master, I must grant you a wish

or I will be returned to this bottle forever." Osama thought a moment.Then, he said, "I want to wake up in the morning with three American women in my bed." Giving the genie an evil glare, he hissed "Now get out of my sight!" The genie said "So be it!" and disappeared back into the bottle.

The next morning, bin Laden woke up in bed with Lorena

Bobbitt, Tonya Harding, and Hillary Clinton.

His penis was gone, his leg was broken, and

he had no health insurance.

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Two bored casino dealers were waiting at a craps table. A very

attractive blonde woman arrived and bet twenty thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice. She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I

feel much luckier when I'm completely nude." With that she stripped from her neck down, rolled the dice and yelled, "Mama needs new clothes!" Then she hollered..."YES! YES! I WON! I WON!" She jumped up and down and hugged each of the dealers. With that she picked up all the money and clothes and quickly departed. The dealers just stared at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?" The other answered, "I thought YOU were watching!"

Moral: Not all blondes are dumb, but most men are perverts

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Originally posted by vicman

Two bored casino dealers were waiting at a craps table. A very

attractive blonde woman arrived and bet twenty thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice. She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I

feel much luckier when I'm completely nude." With that she stripped from her neck down, rolled the dice and yelled, "Mama needs new clothes!" Then she hollered..."YES! YES! I WON! I WON!" She jumped up and down and hugged each of the dealers. With that she picked up all the money and clothes and quickly departed. The dealers just stared at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?" The other answered, "I thought YOU were watching!"

Moral: Not all blondes are dumb, but most men are perverts

ahhhh i like~ :laugh:;)

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