Anal Boot [n] When you take a pitcher of beer,
everyone spits in it,
someone stirs it with their cock and then the mixture
is poured through
the crack of a man ass into the waiting mouth of the
loser of a bet or
Arabian sunglasses - When you cover a lady's eyes with
a ball sack each.
(a.k.a. Arabian goggles)
Australian Death Grip [n] The act of grabbing a woman
haunches/crotch and staring deeply into her eyes until
you're slapped or
kissed. A recommended tactic for very crowded bars.
opportunity for wagering among friends.
The Ball's Eye - Shooting your load directly into the
centre of a chick's
eye (or dude's eye, if that's your thing). Going two
for two (i.e.:
getting both eyes) is referred to as the Deuce, as in
"I deuced my wife
before she went to work this morning". The receiver of
the Ball's Eye is
then referred to as being Cock Eyed or having Cum Eyes
as in, when she
arrives at work her male co-worker could say, "Hey, I
like your Cum Eyes
you ugly biatch"
Ball Sacking [v] stretching of the scrotum over the
face of someone
sleeping or passed out, having a picture taken and
posting it on the
Beef Curtain [n] The shanked out remains of the labia
stretched like Play-doh for an hour or so of jimmy-jam
Drapes, Meat Tarp, Piss Flappers, Quim Nuts, Vertical
The Beetle - When you put your index finger in a
girl's ass, and your
thumb in her pussy and squeeze the two fingers
together, like a beetle's
pincers. Variations include the Japanese Monster
Beetle, wherein you use
three fingers in the ass, or Pac-Man, where you put
all four fingers up
the ass. An extreme version is the Florida Gator,
where you get one hand
up the ass, and one in the pussy.
The Bent Eddy - The act of propping yourself up
against a wall in order to
facilitate cumming in your own face as you pressurize
your Little Steamer.
The guy who first tried this was too ashamed to use
his own name (me).
This manoeuvre can also be combined with the Ball's
Eye for a wonderfully
Black Freddie - Taking a dump on your partners chest.
Variation: The Hot Plate - First taking a piece of
plastic wrap, laying it
on the other persons chest, and pinching a loaf on it.
Blocking the Box [n] When you and your pal are
double-teaming a chick -
he's got her from behind, you've got her mouth.
Selfishly, he drops his
load in her, thus preventing you from using that input
Access Denied Error, Road Closed Due to Bad
The Brodie - As named for Brodie Bruce of Mallrats.
While a girl is
mouthifying your wang, cut a fat burning fart, then
hold her head in
position so she must inhale the nastiness.... Beware,
she may bite in
The Bronco - You start by going doggy style and then
just when she is
really enjoying it, you grab her tits and or a large
lock of hair as tight
as possible and yell another girl's name or state "Ya
know your by far the
ugliest girl I ever farked". This gives you the
feeling of riding a
bronco as she tries to buck you off. (See also The
The Burning Amazon - Setting fire to a girl's pubes.
a.k.a. the Flaming
Carpet Sweeping - farking a girl wheelbarrow style and
dragging her along the carpet so as to "sweep the
The Cherry Danish - Cumming in a girl's face then
punching her in the
nose. a.k.a. Jelly Doughnut
Variation: Chocolate Danish (self-explanatory)
The Chili Dog - You take a shiat on a girl's tits and
then proceed to tit
Chocolate Cha-Cha [n] Anal Sex. Used in a sentence:
"John and George
danced the chocolate cha-cha all night." (a.k.a.
Driving the Hershey
Highway, Riding the Dirt Trail, Utilizing the Third
Input, Poking the
Brown Eye )
The Cleveland Steamer - Mentioned below in The
Fountain of You. After
dumping your load on and around her chest--you
position your ass just
above your own pool of soup and sit in it, full
weight, possibly causing
her to gasp for breath. You then pretend to be pulling
the whistle cord
on a genuine Cleveland steam ship. As you make the
loud noise you slide
in your spunk from her chest to her bush smearing a
spunk trail on her
body in your wake. This can be done with the male
direction. The more authentic the steam whistle sound,
Consolation Prize [n] When you take a girl home from
the bar, thinking
you're going to get laid, and from all of the drinks
you've been feeding
her all night long, she passes out on the bed right
before you get your
pants off. To get revenge, you jerk off and spray your
load all over her
back. Even though you lost and didn't get laid, the
satisfaction you got
is almost as good, hence the term consolation prize.
Coyote - This occurs when you wake up in the room of
someone nasty and you
know you've got to give her the slip. However, you
realize that your arm
is wrapped around them. Therefore you must gnaw off
your own arm to get
out of the situation. Can be very painful.
Cum Dumpster [n] Refers to a girl who has been around
the block quite a
few times, hence she is full of cum.
Cum Savvy - Saving your cum in jars for no other
reason than you have the
jars, the cum and the time.
DDF [n] Distance Distortion Factor - refers to someone
who may seem
attractive from far away but is ugly upon closer
inspection - "good from
far, far from good". Used in a sentence: "Whoa, she's
hot... wait a
sec...ugggh major DDF!"
Dog in a Bathtub - This is a proper name for when you
attempt to insert
your nuts into a girl's ass. It is so named because it
can be just as
hard as keeping a dog in the tub while giving it a
Donkey Punch - Banging a girl doggy style and then
moments before you cum,
sticking your dick in her ass, and then punching her
in the back of the
head. This should give you a tremendous sensation, but
for it to work
correctly, the girl must be knocked out so that her
asshole tightens up.
The Dirty Sanchez - A time honoured event in which
while laying the bone
doggie style, you insert your finger into said woman's
asshole, pull it
out, and wipe it across her upper lip leaving a thin,
This makes her look like someone whose name could be
Dirty Sanchez. A
very popular European variation of this manoeuvre
called "The Hitler"
involves a simple shiat smudge under her nose,
replicating the look of
Felching - It occurs after you have been sticking your
babe in the can,
you bust your nut in there, back up and then pucker
your lips up to her
rim and suck out your ranch dressing. (This is also
the first step of a
very advanced manoeuvre called the Halmstad Hook).
The Finger Puppet - When you're fingering a girls
asshole you push the
membrane which separates the anus from the vagina out
of the vagina thus
creating a vaginal finger puppet. Play at will.
The Fish Eye - From behind, you shove your finger in
her ass, thereupon
she turns around in a one- eyed winking motion to see
what the hell you
are doing. At that point, you have received a "Fish
Eye." ALT: When
you're farking a girl doggy style and out of the blue
you stick it in her
ass, the look she gives you when she turns around is
the fish eye.
Fishhook - A variation of "The Shocker" (an uninvited
digit placed in the
girl's anus ) in which, with the finger still up
there, you "hook" back in
the direction the pussy. No real purpose here other
than to think to
yourself while doing it, "ahhh yes the
Fishhook......". Another variation
called the "New Jersey Meathook" involves sticking
your uninvited digit in
the girl's anus while farking her from behind. You
finger is then turned
upward toward her back and you pull her entire body
toward you over and
over while she is sliding on your cock.
The Flying Camel - As she is lying on her back and you
are hammering her
from your knees, you carefully balance yourself
without using your arms to
prop yourself up. You then proceed to flap your arms
and let out a long,
shrieking howl, much like you would imagine a flying
camel to sound like.
Strictly a class move.
The Fountain of You - While sitting on her face and
having her eat your
ass, jerk off like a madman. Build up as much pressure
as possible before
releasing. Then spew like a venerable geyser all over
her face, neck and
tits. (Better in her bed). This is also a variation of
the first stage
of a Cleveland Steamer to be described later.
Fumilingus [v, n] When a man (or woman) performs
cunnilingus on a woman
and she farts directly in his face.
Fur Ball - You're chomping away at some mighty trollop
who has a mane
between her legs the size of Lionel Richie's afro, you
don't mind though,
that is until a mammoth fur ball gets lodged in your
throat and causes you
to beat the piss out of her.
Game of Smiles [n] This games involves men sitting
around a circular table
and a woman giving random blowjobs underneath the
table. Anyone who
"smiles" has to buy a round of beer for the rest.
Going to the Bullpen [v] The act of fingering the anus
prior to having
anal sex. It kind of "paves the way".
Goobin [n] One of the many wives had by an old-style
Mormon who is not the
main wife. The setup usually involves having your one
"main" wife and the
rest of your other wives who are strictly used for
"Goobin" - a bin for his goo. Used in a sentence:
"Mary's one of John's
The Halmstad Hook - As mentioned above in Felching.
This is a unique
sequence of events named after a town in Sweden, where
happens quite frequently. After dumping your spunk in
her rear, the sauce
is sucked out of the anus by the male. Once the sauce
from her bowls to your mouth--the product that has
been created is now
known as "Swedish Cheese." The move is completed when
the "Swedish Cheese"
is transferred to the ladies mouth via a deep tongue
kiss. You can cap
this off with a swift stinging slap of her ass to show
her how much you
care and appreciate all her hard work.
Head-Rail Hip Thrust - While you're laying on the bed
getting head from a
girl you grab the bed posts with your hands and just
start banging the
hell out of the girl's mouth.
The Houdini - You are screwing a girl doggie-style
when you pull out, spit
on her back, faking your orgasm. When she turns around
and looks at you
lovingly, you blow your load in her face.
A Hot Carl - A simple manoeuvre where you withdraw
your shaft from the
bowels of her anus and place it directly into her
mouth for a cleaning.
Apparently some guy named Carl first tried this.
Hot Lunch - When you physically shiat in the girls
mouth. A popular variant
is the vegetarian hot lunch, in which you place saran
wrap over girls
mouth and then shiat, so she can have the texture of
shiat in her mouth
without coming into contact with any meat products.
She then becomes the
The Ice Pick - In advanced foreplay, while the man is
playing with a
woman's warm vagina, he proceeds to get it as loose as
unexpectedly shoves an ice cube deep into the woman.
The woman must then
squirm and scream until the cube melts. This is great
when sleeping with
an ex and wanting revenge.
Jim Henson [v] When you fist someone and physically
lift them off the
ground. (a.k.a. The Muppet, Ass Puppet, Meat Puppet)
Kennebunkport Surprise [n] The act of covertly filling
your cheeks with
chunky-style New England Chowder, and screaming in
disgust as you hurl it
between your partners legs while giving oral sex.
Leave-in Conditioner [n] Dollops of semen
strategically left in a woman's
hairdo at a public gathering following fellatio. A
good lesson for those
who refuse to swallow the evidence Matching Drapes [n]
whether or not a woman's pubic hair colour matches the
hair on her head.
Used in a sentence: "Wow what a hot looking redhead,
but I wonder do the
curtains match the drapes?".
Mung 1[n, v] Two people dig up the corpse of the
recently deceased. One
undresses the mungee and places his mouth over the
sexual area. The other
backs up and does a running jump onto the corpses
chest. The second
person has to eat everything that enters his mouth.
Insult, seen here in
context: "I'm going to mung your grandmother!"
Mung 2 [n, v] What runs out the twat of a very
pregnant girl who has been
beaten on the swollen belly.
New York Style Taco - Anytime when you are so drunk
that when you go down,
you boot on her box. All the fixin's. (a.k.a. The wet
Paying the Rent [n] A position in which the woman is
folded in half, knees
above shoulders, while the man holds the back of her
calves and bangs her
ferociously. AKA The Hucklebuck
Pearl Necklace - Whenever you cum on the neck area of
a girl - it takes on
the look of beautiful jewellery.
Pet Shop - Inserting a small rodent such as a mouse or
hamster in the anal
cavity or if a woman is very stretched, in the vagina
and left to roam
around. The name comes from an English pop group
Pencil Sharpener [n] - A chick who gives a rough and
toothy blowjob that
scrapes your willy up something awful.
The Phantom - see The Houdini
Pink Glove - This frequently happens during a marathon
session (maybe a
second round) when a girl is simply not wet enough.
When you give up and
attempt to pull out to give her money or whatever, the
inside of her twat
sticks to your hog like the inside of a leather glove.
Thus, the pink
Pole Vault - Originated by ancient Romans. When the
female has sucked
your pole to the point of ejaculation she swiftly
inserts the index finger
of her right hand into your anus. This surprise causes
a subtle popping
out of the eyes, a natural arch to the lower back and
necessary to clear the high bar. Bruce Jenner added
this to his warm-up
routine after losing to Sergie Bubka in the 1979
Purple Mushroom - This occurs when a woman is giving
you oral sex and you
pull your penis back slightly before poking it back
into the inside of her
cheek. It should leave a lasting impression similar to
that of a purple
The Ram - Again, you're attacking from behind, when
you start ramming her
head against the wall in a rhythmic motion. The force
of the wall should
allow for deeper penetration. Very handy for those
lulls in penile
Reacharound [n] The process by which one person is
tossing a guy's salad,
and then reaches around and gives them a hand job.
Reading the Defence [n] The concept of a guy making a
decision when in a situation to score with some chick
when out without his
girlfriend/wife. "Reading the Defence" refers to
making all of the proper
"game time adjustments" not to get caught cheating
later on at some point.
Having Beer Goggles makes it very hard to Read the
Redwings: (n.) One who has eaten a ragging chick out,
has received his
The Rusty Trombone, that's when a girl is tossing your
salad and at the
same time giving you a hand job, see Tossing Salad
The Rodeo - Its close to the Bronco. You're in college
and you go out on a
date with your girlfriend, you come back to have sex
in your room. Four of
your buddies are in the closet. As soon as you get on
top of her, your
buddies come out of the closet yelling RODEO! at the
top of their lungs.
You try to stay on her for a full 8 seconds.
San Diego Surprise [n] The act of bringing a girl home
and while farking
her, having a friend in waiting enter the room naked
in hopes of a
consensual threesome. Named by Navy guys stationed in
Rumoured to work about one third of the time.
Soggy Biscuit - A group of guys, chicks, or both jerk
off while standing
in a circle. When they blow their load, they have to
spew on the biscuit.
The last person to cum has to eat the biscuit.
(a.k.a. The Ookie Cookie but a cookie is used.)
The Southern Trespass [n, v] The Southern Trespass
most frequently occurs
when an over zealous (drunk) man is involved in
intercourse with his lady
friend. Through lack of concentration, lack of
coordination, or simply
because he wants to do it, the man quickly switches
from the woman's
vagina to the corn hole, without missing a beat. If
this act catches the female by complete surprise,
stunning her like a
cattle prod to the ass in a rain storm. No matter how
long the man reaps
the benefits of his efforts, he can now be content
with the fact that he
has committed the coveted Southern Trespass.
The Stranger - Sitting on your hand until it falls
asleep and then jerking
off, eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone
The Thread - This can only be done by ridiculously
Basically, this manoeuvre is "rotational sex", as
opposed to the standard
"thrust sex": instead of banging' your
lady-friend-for-the-evening in an
in and out style, hold her above the washing machine
(or bed or floor or
the surface of your choosing) and rotate her mid-air.
Rumoured to drive
ladies mad (a.k.a. Threading the Shaft, Louisiana
Spinner, Korean Whirl):
Throwing A Pickle Down A Hallway [v] - When you've
just laid the pipe to
some chick (usually fat) who has a big loose box. Used
in a sentence: I
may as well have just thrown a pickle down the hallway
instead of farking
Fat Fanny's loose gash.
Tossing Salad [n] Licking another's anus. Done in
prison as payment for
Tumbleweed - man receives oral sex from woman whilst
driving late '70s
model pickup truck (with gun rack for maximum
enjoyment) at anything over
20mph. upon achieving orgasm, man reaches over, opens
door, and ejects
woman with a brisk shoving motion.
Tuna Melt - Lights out, you're down on a chick lapping
away at an
unusually juicy slab when you discover that it just
happens to be the time
of the month. A man of honor, by no means do you stop.
When the whale
spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers
your face. (this
only work with chicks who REALLY cum hard).
Tupperware Party [n] When three guys are
triple-teaming a chick ... one
with his penis in her mouth, another in her vagina,
and the third in her
anus. So named because she is sealed air-tight.
Twinkler [n, v] When you are 69-ing and she gags on
your member and you
can see her bung-hole pucker up.
Times Square Shuttle [n] You have two girls with you
and they are in the
69 position with each other. You then alternately fark
each of them while
they chow each other. You go from the missionary
position on one and run
to the other side and work in doggie style on the
other one. Repeat as
many times as necessary / possible. (a.k.a. Burning
the Candle at Both
Ends, Playing Ping Pong, The Gunga Din)
Two Pups In The Tub - While in the middle of ass
farking a girl, you take
your left nut and stuff it in her ass along with your
cock and then stuff
your right nut in along with your cock.
The Spalding - After a chick has passed out, proceed
to jerk off onto her
eyelids. When she wakes up it has crusted and she
can't open her eyes.
Valsalva [n] The act of pinching shut (with thumb and
woman's nose while receiving fellatio; most effective
when employed just
prior to the release point due to the gag reflex and
ensuing swallow that
the woman is forced to do to continue breathing. A
great first date ploy,
as it sets the stage for what the rules of engagement
will be ahead.
The Wounded Dragon - You start by having your woman
suck on your cock till
you release into her mouth, before she can spit it out
you punch her in
her stomach which will force your load to come out of