dgmodel Posted June 16 Report Share Posted June 16 ASK YOURSELF:1. Do you ever refer to 6 a.m as tonight? 2. Are you exceptionally particular about what kind of glass your drinks are poured into?3. Do you often find yourself looking at photographic evidence of an evening you don't remember?4. Do you have trouble finding your underwear in the morning?5. Are you ever too hungover to bother bathing?6. Do you lose track of how many drinks you have in a night? Do you care?7. Is a large pepperoni pizza or a fast food cheeseburger at 2:30 in themorning your usual idea of dinner? 8. Do you ever wake up Fully dressed.... * On the bathroom floor? * Halfway into the fridge? * On someone else's couch?9. Do you find yourself saying, a shot for me and all of my friends! more than twice a night?10. Do you find yourself asking what day of the week it is?11. Is the phrase, the hair of the dog... * your mantra? * a multiple choice question? * breakfast? * a weekday routine?12. Do you find bruises or wounds whose origins are entirely unknown?13. Have you ever said more than twice a week, I've never been so drunk inmy life!?14. Do you immediately resume drinking after puking?15. Have you ever sat on the same barstool for 14 hours straight?16. Have you ever had food delivered to a bar?17. Do bartenders at more than one bar know your name and drink of choice? 18. Is a $33 parking ticket an outrage, but $100 at the bar is perfectly acceptable?19. Does the person on the adjacent barstool become your best friend? Do you know his/her name? 20. When you have no money, does the bartender still give you drinks dueto your regular patronage? 42. Are most of your personal affects stained with liquor?43. Have you ever felt like you were trapped in a really bad episode of Cheers? 44. Do you own any articles of clothing from a bar's lost and found?45. Do people buy you booze for your birthday or for Christmas?46. If you only have time or inclination for one, do you have two or threeor more?47. Is your morning coffee Irish?48. Is a beer your idea of exercise the 16-oz. curl?49. Can you claim your bartender as a dependent on your taxes?50. Do you find the fact that you have drinking problem humorous?51. **Bonus**: did you realize that the top 50 questions skipped from # 20to #42? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Codica3 Posted June 16 Report Share Posted June 16 Hmm.. everyone calls me an alcoholic.. sometimes I might believe myself to be becoming one.. but I don't fit a majority of these descriptions.. so I guess I'm still chillin'!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rdancer Posted June 16 Report Share Posted June 16 Originally posted by codica3 Hmm.. everyone calls me an alcoholic.. sometimes I might believe myself to be becoming one.. but I don't fit a majority of these descriptions.. so I guess I'm still chillin'!! Thats not something to be proud about Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jbocc10 Posted June 16 Report Share Posted June 16 ALCOHOLICS UNITE!!!pete rob mike where you at?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blaznny Posted June 16 Report Share Posted June 16 Originally posted by rdancer Thats not something to be proud about sure it is... in fact i will drink to that.actually we're not really alcoholics, alcoholics go to meetings that quote is very trite but also very true Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Codica3 Posted June 16 Report Share Posted June 16 Originally posted by rdancer Thats not something to be proud about You can bite me. I'll make sure to have a drink or two for you tonite and tomorrow morning.P.S. It took me a SECOND reading of all those things up there to realize that the numbers skipped.. wow.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bbbooom Posted June 17 Report Share Posted June 17 lol 51 is great...i didnt even notice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nSyNcBaBy Posted June 17 Report Share Posted June 17 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Codica3 Posted June 17 Report Share Posted June 17 According to Mr. Roninmess, I'm already an alcoholic and I need to "seek prof help" Yesterday he tried to tell me he knows me better than I think. Hun, chill, I don't drink cause I'm an alcoholic. Stop making me out to be evil and whatnot.. although I have missed work the past 3 days.. Nah, but I'm fine. First step: admitting it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deejayjojo Posted June 18 Report Share Posted June 18 ASK YOURSELF:1. Do you ever refer to 6 a.m as tonight? -- Yes. the next day only comes after you have slept or you have met up with people who have already slept.2. Are you exceptionally particular about what kind of glass your drinks are poured into?-- Sure. But i would not complain or turn a drink down because of it.3. Do you often find yourself looking at photographic evidence of an evening you don't remember?-- Not often enough...it is usually very hard to piece the night back together...pictures help.4. Do you have trouble finding your underwear in the morning?-- No Comment5. Are you ever too hungover to bother bathing?-- Yes. But I think that has to do with my laziness mostly.6. Do you lose track of how many drinks you have in a night? Do you care?-- I drink till they stop serving. never know how many.7. Is a large pepperoni pizza or a fast food cheeseburger at 2:30 in themorning your usual idea of dinner? -- @ 2:30 I am still drinking.8. Do you ever wake up Fully dressed....* On the bathroom floor?-- Once clothed, once nekkid* Halfway into the fridge?-- nah* On someone else's couch?-- sure is better than in my parked but running car...or on the hood of it due to lost keys...drunk driving is bad9. Do you find yourself saying, a shot for me and all of my friends! more than twice a night?-- nah..but there is always one of those in the crowd and i'm more than happy to play along.10. Do you find yourself asking what day of the week it is?-- sure...day of week, day, month...i am not particularly interested in that whole calendar and clock thing11. Is the phrase, the hair of the dog...* your mantra?* a multiple choice question?* breakfast?* a weekday routine?-- huh??12. Do you find bruises or wounds whose origins are entirely unknown?-- occasionally, but only because i don't feel much pain when i'm drunk13. Have you ever said more than twice a week, I've never been so drunk inmy life!?-- nah...but it is only monday so there's still a chance14. Do you immediately resume drinking after puking?-- nope...it's rare that i get ill...but when it happens, i am done.15. Have you ever sat on the same barstool for 14 hours straight?-- oh yeah...new orleans@mardi gras...it was a stip joint16. Have you ever had food delivered to a bar?-- sure...see number 15 above17. Do bartenders at more than one bar know your name and drink of choice? -- oh yeah...cheers18. Is a $33 parking ticket an outrage, but $100 at the bar is perfectly acceptable?-- nah...i don't keep track of what i spend ever...sometimes i have a lot...sometimes i don't...that is as far as i think it through19. Does the person on the adjacent barstool become your best friend? Do you know his/her name? -- on a good night...i like strangers20. When you have no money, does the bartender still give you drinks dueto your regular patronage? -- no...but if anybody knows of such a place, please put me on to it.42. Are most of your personal affects stained with liquor?-- i drop drinks a lot, but my dry cleaner usually comes through for me43. Have you ever felt like you were trapped in a really bad episode of Cheers? -- trapped implies i am trying to get out44. Do you own any articles of clothing from a bar's lost and found?-- nah...but i am sure some people own a few of my lost articles45. Do people buy you booze for your birthday or for Christmas?-- sure...booze is the perfect gift...has anyone ever given you the "What am I going to do with this?" face after opening a bottle of their choice.46. If you only have time or inclination for one, do you have two or threeor more?-- drinks are like lays potato chips...can't have just one.i would never be so naive.that takes care of inclinations, see answer 10 for the time thing. 47. Is your morning coffee Irish?-- nah...don't mess with my coffee48. Is a beer your idea of exercise the 16-oz. curl?-- nah...if i am going to be mobile, i curl 40s49. Can you claim your bartender as a dependent on your taxes?-- shit...gotta pay my taxes50. Do you find the fact that you have drinking problem humorous?-- yup...i find humor in everything51. **Bonus**: did you realize that the top 50 questions skipped from # 20to #42?-- nope...but did you know that 42 is the meaning of life?Wow...that was a good one..I feel much better now.How did I do? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jane_08 Posted June 18 Report Share Posted June 18 crap that is the funniest shit.. i haven't posted on this site in FOREVER and that was hysterical!crisis intervention in my living room every sunday night. the family's been getting a little concerned. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deejayjojo Posted June 18 Report Share Posted June 18 Glad to hear you enjoyed it...it literally took me a lifetime to write...While we are on this subject, here's what a few great minds had to say..."I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."- Frank Sinatra"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools."- Ernest Hemingway"Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure."- Ambrose Bierce"The problem with some people is that when they aren't drunk, they're sober."- William Butler Yeats"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on."- Dean Martin"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."- Henny Youngman"One more drink and I'd be under the host."- Dorothy Parker"A drink a day keeps the shrink away."- Edward Abbey"Nobody puts JD in the corner!"- OK. I just made this one up.And to save the greatest and wisest mind of our time for last..."Okay, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me. Let's just take this exam so I can get back to killing you with beer."- Homer Simpson Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Codica3 Posted June 18 Report Share Posted June 18 Originally posted by deejayjojo And to save the greatest and wisest mind of our time for last..."Okay, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me. Let's just take this exam so I can get back to killing you with beer."- Homer Simpson Most excellent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ronin Posted June 18 Report Share Posted June 18 Originally posted by codica3 According to Mr. Roninmess, I'm already an alcoholic and I need to "seek prof help" Yesterday he tried to tell me he knows me better than I think. Hun, chill, I don't drink cause I'm an alcoholic. Stop making me out to be evil and whatnot.. although I have missed work the past 3 days.. Nah, but I'm fine. First step: admitting it. denial Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Codica3 Posted June 18 Report Share Posted June 18 Originally posted by roninmess denial No.Stop making me feel shitty. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Codica3 Posted June 18 Report Share Posted June 18 On a side note.. I did find a nice website that lists like tons and tons of different cocktails and the ingredients and the recipes.. Some of them drinks look YUMMY. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blaznny Posted June 18 Report Share Posted June 18 Originally posted by roninmess denial wishes he was an alcohlic, but he is a light weight and only likes faggy umbrella drinks like soprano. :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Codica3 Posted June 18 Report Share Posted June 18 Originally posted by blaznny wishes he was an alcohlic, but he is a light weight and only likes faggy umbrella drinks like soprano. :laugh: Roninmess.. did you NOT tell me you were buzzing off ONE (1) Corona the other night?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ronin Posted June 18 Report Share Posted June 18 Originally posted by codica3 Roninmess.. did you NOT tell me you were buzzing off ONE (1) Corona the other night?! um no? And why would i want to be an alcoholic? It's something to be realllll proud of. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Codica3 Posted June 18 Report Share Posted June 18 Originally posted by roninmess um no? And why would i want to be an alcoholic? It's something to be realllll proud of. Umm.. I never said that I'm proud to be an alcoholic.. where did you get that?? Especially when I'm not one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ronin Posted June 18 Report Share Posted June 18 Originally posted by codica3 Umm.. I never said that I'm proud to be an alcoholic.. where did you get that?? Especially when I'm not one. that was aimed towards blaze Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dgmodel Posted June 18 Author Report Share Posted June 18 I HATE IT WHEN PPL SAY "YOURE IN DENIAL" ON ANYTHING!!! NOT JUST ALCOHOLISM ON ANYTHING!!! ITS SOOO FUCKIN' STUPID... IF I CALLED YOU A CRACKHEAD AND YOURE NOT YOUD SAY "NO IM NOT..." THEN ID SAY YOURE IN DENIAL AND THEN ITS SUCH A POINTLESS DISCUSSION... GRRRRR! dont know if this makes sense just hate it when ppl say "youre in denial" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Codica3 Posted June 18 Report Share Posted June 18 Originally posted by dgmodel I HATE IT WHEN PPL SAY "YOURE IN DENIAL" ON ANYTHING!!! NOT JUST ALCOHOLISM ON ANYTHING!!! ITS SOOO FUCKIN' STUPID... IF I CALLED YOU A CRACKHEAD AND YOURE NOT YOUD SAY "NO IM NOT..." THEN ID SAY YOURE IN DENIAL AND THEN ITS SUCH A POINTLESS DISCUSSION... GRRRRR! dont know if this makes sense just hate it when ppl say "youre in denial" THANK YOU!! You can say that to like ANYTHING!! I'm not in denial.. and when people say that to you, it's like a lose/lose situation.. cause if you say "no I'm not", they say "see there ya go, denial" and if you say "ok fine I am in denial", they see "see I told you so". Ugh!! Good call dgmodel. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dgmodel Posted June 18 Author Report Share Posted June 18 person 1 : "youre gay"person 2 : " no im not "Person 1 : "see youre in denial closet fag! "its so stupid... it really really aggrevates me and annoys me... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deejayjojo Posted June 19 Report Share Posted June 19 Da Nile is not just a river in egypt.I think you are in denial that you are in denial...Say no, and you are in denial of that...Oh my god I've gone cross-eyed!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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