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marcid21

Excuses Excuses....

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Originally posted by marcid21

...what excuses do you guys use when you're not particularly in the mood???

We're all sex fiends here....but you know we've all used em....

...so spill it... :tongue:

If I am not in the mood I am usually passed out drunk, so I can't help you on this one. But if you aren't in the mood then you need to get yourself that way if your partner wants to have sex.

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hmmm i turn her off :tongue:

that´s pretty easy, lead her imagination.

if i would tell you to imagine an infected purulent wound that bursts open when you poke your finger in and the pus is covering your finger and you can actually smell it and it stinks so bad and that combined with the texture of the pus on your fingers etc. etc.

now if you´re not totally turned off by now i will make you think of people that you loved that died and how you miss them, so you better be quiet and leave me alone ;)

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i say im not in the mood. :laugh:

the worst is when you say youre not in the mood and they get insulted as if youre rejecting them...

last time i told this kid i wasnt in the mood (months ago), he gave me the "i dont need anymore girlfriends speech". haha, now i think its funny, back then i was pissed. i told him "listen, i want you, just not now, maybe later, maybe tomorrow, who knows and if u have a problem with that, bye." :rolleyes:

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Originally posted by somebitch

just their timing

It is still rejection. No matter how you look at it, and of fcourse they are going to be broken hearted or even really pissed off, if you have been giving them the candy for a long time and then one day cut them off and take the candy away, little boys will cry.

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Originally posted by somebitch

i say im not in the mood. :laugh:

the worst is when you say youre not in the mood and they get insulted as if youre rejecting them...

last time i told this kid i wasnt in the mood (months ago), he gave me the "i dont need anymore girlfriends speech". haha, now i think its funny, back then i was pissed. i told him "listen, i want you, just not now, maybe later, maybe tomorrow, who knows and if u have a problem with that, bye." :rolleyes:

Good for you!! (seriously!) and Good for that guy for saying that to you (The 'girlfriends' comment). Both of you had the proper statements and made them with aplomb.

Somebitch, I salute you! :aright:

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Originally posted by therunner

if you have been giving them the candy for a long time and then one day cut them off and take the candy away, little boys will cry.

that's why women shouldn't date little boys.

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Originally posted by cintron

that's why women shouldn't date little boys.

But if you are giving them an excuse, it should be a good one, and not just I am not in the mood. That's not fair. If you are not in the mood to have a healthy relationship you need to explain why you are not in the mood. Or at least let them know that it is nothing that they have done that is keeping you from getting in the mood.

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and also there shouldn't be an excuse as to why you are not in the mood, there should be reasons as to why you aren't in the mood. Even if they are dumb reasons, they are still reasons and should be brought out to your partner as to why you are not in the mood.

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Originally posted by therunner

But if you are giving them an excuse, it should be a good one, and not just I am not in the mood. That's not fair. If you are not in the mood to have a healthy relationship you need to explain why you are not in the mood. Or at least let them know that it is nothing that they have done that is keeping you from getting in the mood.

Last time I checked, a good relationship didnt revolve around sex....Dont get me wrong, I love sex but its not the only thing that I would base a relationship on.....And I dont see anything wrong with telling a person you're not in the mood...Maybe you had a long day at work and you're tired....If the person I was with told me this I wouldnt take it as rejection...They're just simply not in the mood to have sex.......

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Originally posted by nycmuzik2000

Last time I checked, a good relationship didnt revolve around sex....Dont get me wrong, I love sex but its not the only thing that I would base a relationship on.....And I dont see anything wrong with telling a person you're not in the mood...Maybe you had a long day at work and you're tired....If the person I was with told me this I wouldnt take it as rejection...They're just simply not in the mood to have sex.......

I never said that the relationship revolved around sex, but if you aren't getting sex in the relationship, would you stay in it? Honestly?

ANd there is nothing wrong with telling the person that you are not in the mood, that is fine too, but I think you need to let them know WHY you are not in the mood, and not just make up some lame excuse, or just say "i'm not in the mood" but if you say "hey I had a long day, the boss ripped my head off, the dog died, what ever thats fine, but just saying that I am not in the mood, leaves the other person feeling guilty, as though they are the reason for you not being in the mood. That is why I said that out of fairness you should explain as to why you are not in the mood, even if it is the simpelist reason.

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Originally posted by therunner

I never said that the relationship revolved around sex, but if you aren't getting sex in the relationship, would you stay in it? Honestly?

Well if I was getting no sex than it would have been different...If it was something that happened once or twice ever once in a while then I really wouldnt care....

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Originally posted by nycmuzik2000

Well if I was getting no sex than it would have been different...If it was something that happened once or twice ever once in a while then I really wouldnt care....

how long is while? week, two weeks? once a month, once every six month? How often would you need sex to keep it a healthy relationship?

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I really dont look at it like I must have sex X amount of times a week....If I'm in the mood to have sex or the person I'm with is in the mood then we have sex....But if I did have to put a number on it then I would say at least a few times a week if not more....

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Originally posted by nycmuzik2000

I really dont look at it like I must have sex X amount of times a week....If I'm in the mood to have sex or the person I'm with is in the mood then we have sex....But if I did have to put a number on it then I would say at least a few times a week if not more....

A few times a week puts sex pretty high in the must have for a healthy relationship.

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Originally posted by therunner

how long is while? week, two weeks? once a month, once every six month? How often would you need sex to keep it a healthy relationship?

This isn't the point...you're getting :otopic: here....

Why do some men get so funny when it comes to sex? Seriously? Do us women have to be walking hornballs all the time??? I understand that most of us share a common love of sex, and things involving it....but we're not always gonna be in the mood. We don't have to fill some sort of anamalistic quota as to how many times a week/month/yr that we have to mate....

My point, basically proven by Runner, is that some guys feel as though it's rejection, but it's not. Most guys get silly stupid and it all turns into a matter of rejection and proving their manhood...yada yada yada...

its such crap! We just don't want to fuck. End of story.

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Originally posted by marcid21

This isn't the point...you're getting :otopic: here....

Why do some men get so funny when it comes to sex? Seriously? Do us women have to be walking hornballs all the time??? I understand that most of us share a common love of sex, and things involving it....but we're not always gonna be in the mood. We don't have to fill some sort of anamalistic quota as to how many times a week/month/yr that we have to mate....

My point, basically proven by Runner, is that some guys feel as though it's rejection, but it's not. Most guys get silly stupid and it all turns into a matter of rejection and proving their manhood...yada yada yada...

its such crap! We just don't want to fuck. End of story.

Bullshit!! You could be stricken with the last stages of Ebola and you'd still fuck if <insert name of idolized hollywood leading hunk here> asked you to.

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Originally posted by embodiedhate

Bullshit!! You could be stricken with the last stages of Ebola and you'd still fuck if <insert name of idolized hollywood leading hunk here> asked you to.

right on!! But what she said is still nothing of what I was talking about.

But the whole point that I was making is that if you are going to tell your man NO, then maybe for his sake you should explain, there has to be a reason for you not being in the mood, especially if it happens 29 days a month, before he looks at you as a cold hearted bitch and says "fuck off CUNT!! I don't need this shit from you!" and goes out finds someone that will give it to him or will at least talk to him as to why they are not in the mood.

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Originally posted by marcid21

This isn't the point...you're getting :otopic: here....

Why do some men get so funny when it comes to sex? Seriously? Do us women have to be walking hornballs all the time??? I understand that most of us share a common love of sex, and things involving it....but we're not always gonna be in the mood. We don't have to fill some sort of anamalistic quota as to how many times a week/month/yr that we have to mate....

I agree.....Its just sex...And just because I might have it a few times a week when I'm in a relationship doesnt mean I place a high emphasis on it....Its happens when it does...I dont spend my whole day saying to myself that I'm gonna have sex when I get home.....

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Originally posted by marcid21

This isn't the point...you're getting :otopic: here....

Why do some men get so funny when it comes to sex? Seriously? Do us women have to be walking hornballs all the time??? I understand that most of us share a common love of sex, and things involving it....but we're not always gonna be in the mood. We don't have to fill some sort of anamalistic quota as to how many times a week/month/yr that we have to mate....

My point, basically proven by Runner, is that some guys feel as though it's rejection, but it's not. Most guys get silly stupid and it all turns into a matter of rejection and proving their manhood...yada yada yada...

its such crap! We just don't want to fuck. End of story.

Seriously- give me a fucking break. Just because you're in a relatinoship with someone, it doesn't mean that your body is at their disposal 24/7. And giving a reason, like Runner said, doesn't always work either. It's 1 am, weds night, you have to get up for work in the morning, and your partner doesn't try to have sex until after you've already been relaxing in bed for half an hour... like he did for the third night in a row... and yet still he gets pissed when you say "I'm tired, not now!"

It doesn't have to be that extreme, and I hope most guys would be more understanding than the fellow in the above-mentioned anecdote was... but still, most women above the age of, say 20, who are working full-time aren't permanently horny...

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