naomi1 Posted July 25 Report Share Posted July 25 BEAR MARKET: A 6 to 18-month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.EBITDA: earnings before I tricked damn auditor.EBIT: earnings before irregularities and tampering.CEO: chief embezzlement officer.CFO: corporate fraud officer.NAV: normal Anderson valuation.FRS: fantasy reporting standards.P/E: parole entitlement.EPS: eventual prison sentence.BULL MARKET: A random market movement causing an investor to mistake Himself for a financial genius.MOMENTUM INVESTING: The fine art of buying high and selling low.VALUE INVESTING: The art of buying low and selling lower.P/E RATIO: The percentage of investors wetting their pants as themarket keeps crashing.BROKER: What my broker has made me."BUY, BUY": A flight attendant making market recommendations as you step off the plane.STANDARD & POOR: Your life in a nutshell.STOCK ANALYST: Idiot who just downgraded your stock.STOCK SPLIT: When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assetsequally between themselves.FINANCIAL PLANNER: A guy who actually remembers his wallet when he runs to the 7-11 for toilet paper and cigarettes.MARKET CORRECTION: The day after you buy stocks.CASH FLOW: The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.WINDOWS 2000: What you jump out of when you're the sucker that bought Yahoo @ $240 per share.YAHOO: What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240per share.INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR: Past year investor who's now lockedup in a nuthouse.PROFIT: Religious guy who talks to God Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ravengirl Posted July 25 Report Share Posted July 25 Naomi, where do you come up with this stuff - its priceless!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
naomi1 Posted July 25 Author Report Share Posted July 25 Originally posted by ravengirl Naomi, where do you come up with this stuff - its priceless!!!!! I get emails from all sort of sources....this is how I keep my sanity,,, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ravengirl Posted July 25 Report Share Posted July 25 i totaly understand if it wasnt for cp and pool i would have gone postal a long time ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.