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xxsweetie

Bad Person?

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My x-boyfriend and I broke up 1.5 years ago (I broke up w/him) He's been dating some girl for a while. Recently, one of his friends ran into one of my friends and said that he thinks my x and his girl are gonna get married. :eek:

Now I consider myself to be a good and well-wishing person, but somehow this news doesn't sit well with me...Its not that I want him back or want to get married...just that I am not exactly thriled about this:vomit3:

I know that when I broke up w/ him I relinquished by "hold" and that that people move on...but so soon?:confused:

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Well you can't expect him to sit around alone for 1.5 yrs. I understand what your saying though. I broke up with a girl I was going out with for like 2 years, but when I heard she was just seeing this other guy, it kinda got me a little jelous even though I don't really want her back. You feel replaced and no one ever wants to feel like they can be replaced. Most of us grow up and are taught that everyone is an individual, but the truth is that there are many people just like the next.

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Actually..the same thing happened to me..My ex (my 1st actually) is also getting married..and at 1st it really bothered me but I got over it. I mean it's not like I wanted to get married, DEF NOT, but I just felt weird because he was MY bf..lol and now he's getting married to someone else!:D

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ur not a bad person....if i found out that my ex was gettin married id be weirded out too... regardless of how 2 people break up its odd to hear and see him/her with another person even more intimately than they were with u. does that make sense?

idk ... i can totally understand where ur comin from... although thats never happened to me and as long as im over my ex's, the fact that theyre with someone else doesnt usually phase me.. i think id still be a lil iffy if i found out some news like that... just cuz its weird! lol i sound like i keep repeating myself. whatever :tongue:

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I learned that my hs sweetheart was engaged about a year after we broke up... and he was married about 6 months after that. It seemed kind of odd that it happened so fast, not to mention that he was only 21, and it was a little freaky, but I can't say it actually bothered me, as any feelings I'd had towards him were long gone.

Anyhoo, it's now almost 7 years later. My Mom ran into him maybe six months ago; he's still married, and his twin sons were on the verge of turning one.

All I can think, is thank goodness it's not me! :laugh: :laugh:

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Originally posted by xxsweetie

You guys are all totally right...its just tought coming to the realization of how replaceable you really are:(

You're thinking about it in totally the wrong way, if you think people are replacable. You're not being fair to yourself in thinking that, and you're also not being fair to his happiness, by basically implying that this girl he's marrying is just another incarnation of you. People aren't like light bulbs. If you guys dated for a year and a half and had true love, then that's something that will never go away. It's true that when you love someone, and you break up, you'll never love in that way again, because each love that you ever had is different from the others. It doesn't mean that replace the love you had with one person with another. You hold onto those good feelings forever and move on... which in and of itself is different for each situation. You're not being replaced. You're not even in the current picture. He's found someone he obviously feel like he wants to spend the rest of his life with; something that you didn't feel would work out with him. So, be happy for him. He's found happiness, and is looking to settle down. And keep this in mind about what you said:

1) His friend said that he THINKS they MAY be getting married. That doesn't sound like a definite to me.

2) "So soon?" -> time doesn't exist, and in relationships, people feel they can take large steps at different times. Maybe he's ready... even though you're not. Good thing you're not getting married to him.

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