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Do people have to go through bad experiences in order to enjoy the good ones?


georgym

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I was just thinking about this, because some of my friends in the past, even knowingly, got into some trouble. Whether it was with drugs, sex, driving fast cars, mixing everywhere in between.

Now most of these friends have sobered up and turned over a new leaf. They somehow seem to know better than others what they want, simply b/c they went through some times of "being bad"

What do you alll think of this :confused:

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very interesting topic :)

when you look at the ancient chinese Yin-Yang symbol, it contains a dark side and a white side. many similar ancient and religious stories and such that speak of creation consume themselves by discussing these opposites as somehow being able to exit together in a kind of ordered chaos (how's that for a contradiction?). also, there is the old saying that humans cannot appreciate good feelings, without feeling bad feelings - and similarly cannot revile bad things without good things.

going back to the Yin-Yang symbol, one side is white or good (1) and the other side is dark and evil (0). together, they make a circle. the circle represents a sense of completeness or enlightenment or infinity. which, if one applies oneself to the search for enlightenment, is essentially a good thing (1).

note the seeming contradiction here - that is, good and bad together is actually still good (which begs the question, is bad REALLY bad at all?)

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Guest jroo

ok, how about this, what if you're girl has never been bad? should you be worried that she'll have to go bad to realize what she wants in life? and if its even you after all of that?

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Originally posted by jroo

ok, how about this, what if you're girl has never been bad?

define "bad"

should you be worried that she'll have to go bad to realize what she wants in life? and if its even you after all of that?

yes, you can be pretty sure that she will do it, on purpose or not, people just go through bad and good in life. ONLY when you know both sides you can make a decision. only if you have felt cold AND hot water can you really judge the temperature

see, i was a total loser with women till the age of 14 or 15, i mean TOTAL loser, i was SUPERNICE, i was superhappy when a girl even talked to me, i had no girlfriend, never kissed, was still a virgin etc..

THEN i changed myself cause my "old self" obviously didn´t work the way i wanted it too.

till the age of 18 i became a super-jerk, and i mean SUPER. i was getting girls and dumping them the same night, treated them like dogs, lied to them i loved them and dumped them 2 days after, told a girl i was monogamous with her and fucked her best girlfriend behind her back only to see what would happen if i tell her, etc.. i was a user and destroyer to the max.

i am now 19 and currently recovering from that to a more neutral, BALANCED state of mind. where i can have girls but do not want to hurt them per se any more, where i want their lives to be as good as mine as well, where i want to leave them better as i found them, where i want to share and not just take, etc.

see, a pendelum (sp?) that is in motion swings from side to side before it comes to rest in the middle. if you start it off extremly on one side and let it go, it will swing the more to side B the more it was on side A. but in the end, it will come to REST in the middle, this is the IDEAL state of the pendelum, a relaxed state, a NATURAL and BALANCED state where there is no excess energy needed to hold it there, where you can now USE the engergy you wasted before, use it the way you WANT.

makes any sense?

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Guest jroo

yeah, all that makes since. ive never used girls or lied to get in bed with them. but ive also never really had a girlfriend. ive had 2 real relationships. but ive also had my share. i know what i want. and she tells me what she wants. but she has never been wild and off the chain. i want her to expierence everything. i want to be there when she does. i just hope that nothing changes about us. like you, i want to make her life better than it could possibly be. i kinda feel bad, because i was wild and totally off the chain. and that all happened when i was in the army. i want her to go through the things that ive been through. she's a lot smarter than me and probably be a lot better than i was. :) whats the point of this reply? beats me....

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