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suthrnbelle

faithfulness and true love...

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ok, this one is a little serious, but i was talking with someone today about these two topics, and it got me wondering...

do you believe that it is possible to be totally faithful, for the rest of your life, till death do us part, etc?

do you believe in such a thing as true love?

b/c to me, true love, means you are not interested in anyone else--you may look occasionally, but no desire to touch...

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Originally posted by suthrnbelle

ok, this one is a little serious, but i was talking with someone today about these two topics, and it got me wondering...

do you believe that it is possible to be totally faithful, for the rest of your life, till death do us part, etc?

do you believe in such a thing as true love?

b/c to me, true love, means you are not interested in anyone else--you may look occasionally, but no desire to touch...

To be totally faithful isnt a problem . If/when I get to the point where I want to marry a guy, im goin to be damn sure hes going to be the one i want to be with for the rest of my life, and no one else. so theres no need for me to go elsewhere...for a bf, if im with him, im with him only, Theres no reason to not be faithful, especially to someone i wouldnt want to hurt. Ive been cheated on, and i wouldnt wish that hurt on anyone...and yes true love i believe in, exactly what you said above, look but dont touch. :tongue:

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Guest gabo

are people really meant to be together for the rest of our lives??

look at the stats. Half ends in divorce and half of the ones that stay together are only still married for money or the kids. so were left with about 25 % of the people who get married are happily married. now thats scary. I want to find my sould mate like everyone else but how do we know if its the right one? Everything seems peachy keen for the first few years... what about 15-20 years down the road? How do you know that youll still be in love with that person and that shell love me back?

ok I am going to stop there before I get any more depressed.

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u dont necessarily find the needle in the haystack.... someitmes, it works out that they happen to find u... when u least expect it..

and when that happens, and u know u truly love someone.. and u know deep down ur a good person... with morals... u wouldnt have to worry about now being faithful to him/her.

it just comes naturally.

IMO, if u question whether to cheat or not, then u dont truly love that person. regardless of what u THINK u feel... it cant possibly be love in its purest form...

so my advice is, just try to be true to urself and the one u love... and if the love is real, then u wont have to try so hard ;)

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what you say makes perfect sense...the problem is that i am not worried about MY faithfulness, lol, b/c when i truly care about someone i would never have a reason to cheat or be unfaithful--i am worried about others being faithful to me :( but you are right, if i ever find my true love or if he ever finds me, i would hope that would not be an issue :) and i am trying really, reeeeeeeaaaaally hard to not lose hope that i will get that fairy tale ;)

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If you have any doubts, then that's not a sign of a good & healthy relationship. I was in your situation before, more times than I care to remember, where I'd wonder about the other person. Now I don't even speak to any of those girls.

But you will find the fairy tale, or as Lina says, the fairy tale will find you. Actually, the fairy tale will come and smack you with a 2X4 when you're looking the other way with your back turned, and it will be the most wonderful thing you've ever experienced without a doubt.

But back to your original topic, being an optimistic idealist, I do believe in eternal and true love, death do us part, etc. I'm in no rush to get married, because I'm the type of person that if I'm going to go through with it, I'm gonna do it right.

There was an old Chinese proverb, you may have seen in an email that keeps going around, that says something to the effect that you want to spend your life with someone who, abpove all else, you have great conversations with. Because, after everything else is gone, you'll both still be able to talk to each other and enjoy each other's company. I believe in that.

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Originally posted by trueqwest

enjoy yourself. Like I said, love will hit you when you least expect it.

There are lots of us guys that do believe in loyalty, love, and honor. Don't give up on us...we're out there.

Thats whats keeping me going and not swearing off relationships...that somewhere there are good guys left out there for the good girls....its kinda sad when I refer a great relationship guy as abnormal..the norm nowadays seems to be the opposite

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Originally posted by destiny779

Thats whats keeping me going and not swearing off relationships...that somewhere there are good guys left out there for the good girls....its kinda sad when I refer a great relationship guy as abnormal..the norm nowadays seems to be the opposite

amen, sister :)

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nothing in life is a sure thing. I wish that something's were and one of those things I would wish is relationships and friendships. People always say that they will be friends forever and that they will love and cherish one another forever, and sometimes that is not the case. I agree with GABO that there is an increasingly high amount of people getting divorced and just staying with each other because of the money and kids. I think that is a shitty way to live. I don't agree with that kind of a lifestyle and just because that kind of shit is happening in this world, doesn't mean I should go along with it and be a statistic. Some people go through life and they can't be faithful with each other, I have watched way to many movies and shows where people cheat on each other, and even though Im not in that situation it still makes me sick to my stomach. The jist of what im trying to say is that if you are honest and truthful with the person that you love then these things shouldn't occur. You have to pay attention to the little details in life, always ask the question why. Love is a game: That is why god made women and men so different, so that it would be interesting. Sometimes you get knocked down and while you are sitting on your ass you tend to anazlyze the situation a bit more clearly. But you have to pick yourself back up, sometimes you have to go through 100 bad people to meet one good person.

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Originally posted by suthrnbelle

ok, this one is a little serious, but i was talking with someone today about these two topics, and it got me wondering...

do you believe that it is possible to be totally faithful, for the rest of your life, till death do us part, etc?

do you believe in such a thing as true love?

b/c to me, true love, means you are not interested in anyone else--you may look occasionally, but no desire to touch...

If you believe in what you have and what you are building upon, the faith just comes as part of the package.

True love is that uncondtional love for someone that means sooo much to you, but it's not neccessarily like being in love, if that makes sense...

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i believe that it is out there. i dont know whether i will find it.

it is easy to believe because beliefs are grounded in possibility not reality. anything is possible... will we find it?? who knows.

truely loving someone for their mind & being, loving someone because they are who they are not beause they have what they have materially...

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Originally posted by suthrnbelle

what you say makes perfect sense...the problem is that i am not worried about MY faithfulness, lol, b/c when i truly care about someone i would never have a reason to cheat or be unfaithful--i am worried about others being faithful to me :( but you are right, if i ever find my true love or if he ever finds me, i would hope that would not be an issue :) and i am trying really, reeeeeeeaaaaally hard to not lose hope that i will get that fairy tale ;)

this is so depressing bc the only person you can really truly trust is yourself. you cant control other people's feelings or actions

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it is simply biological (=genetically programmed) in men and women to be attracted to (genetically) better partners, regardless of whether you are in "love" or not. guess how love and WHY love was created? to bound you to your current BEST genetical partner.

yeah, you "wouldn´t want to hurt" your partner, but you´re fighting an INSTINCT here. if the other guy or girl that you are attracted to is around long enough and also states interest in you you WILL get weak :)! it´s like being MAD hungry and having a tiny chicken wing and a bloody juicy steak right in front of you. now which one are you gonna take (if not both :tongue: )?

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that's exactly why i worry :no:

honestly, i don't look when i am really into someone--i mean, i admire someone else's attributes or whatever, but when i am REALLY into a guy, i don't care about anyone else(now, if i am just dating or playing, then hell yeah, i want everything on the buffet that looks good to me, lol)...am i in the minority, then, tastey? is that what you're saying?

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Originally posted by suthrnbelle

what you say makes perfect sense...the problem is that i am not worried about MY faithfulness, lol, b/c when i truly care about someone i would never have a reason to cheat or be unfaithful--i am worried about others being faithful to me :( but you are right, if i ever find my true love or if he ever finds me, i would hope that would not be an issue :) and i am trying really, reeeeeeeaaaaally hard to not lose hope that i will get that fairy tale ;)

I am having the same problem, to me true love these days is as real as Cinderella...................

I mean I see it, with older couples everywhere.... but in today's day and age, it just doesn't seem possible. I am also not trying to loose hope however, it seems to work out for everyone besides me.......................

I have no problem being faithfull, never ever have....... I just thinkit is a very mean thing to do when your letting someone think they have all of you when they really don't ............

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perns, i feel your pain more than you know :( so sorry girl--i know where you are coming from, but we have to try not to lose hope!!! dammit, we will get the princes someday, we are just having to weed out a whole lot of frogs first, lol ;)

hey tastey: have you ever been in LOVE? i mean, really in love? *curious*

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Originally posted by suthrnbelle

perns, i feel your pain more than you know :( so sorry girl--i know where you are coming from, but we have to try not to lose hope!!! dammit, we will get the princes someday, we are just having to weed out a whole lot of frogs first, lol ;)

Jeez, you girls almost make me feel guilty I'm dating someone. (Almost, I love her too much)

I send out big, BIG, BIG hugs to you and perns.

There are loyal and faithful guys like me out there...Don't stress yourselves out ;)

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Originally posted by suthrnbelle

hey tastey: have you ever been in LOVE? i mean, really in love? *curious*

dunno, i *thought* i was in love... well, till i finally got the girl... and then it got boring like it gets every time... so i guess it was the challenge that i loved and not "love".

what is "love" anyway? i mean give me a few weeks and i´ll get you literally ANY girl to fall in "love" with me. find out what she wants deep inside (specifically, which emotions and what triggers those that she has to experience to have a specific state (love, arousal, attraction, etc.)) and provide her with it, then fuck her good... it is basically really that simple when you´ve done it a few times. "love" is something that you can PRODUCE very easily, definately overrated IMO :)

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