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dgmodel

slumber parties...

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oh also a fuck buddy like that has to be that way from the begining.. if you ever had any sort of intimacy with the person it will not work. they will get pissed off that you dont want to hang out and probably never see you again.. so dont try it with people you have already assumed the other sort of relationship with.

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BOOTY CALL RULES

1. NO sleeping over

2. NO meeting in public

3. NO calls before 2 A.M.

2. None of that lovemaking stuff!

3. No emotional discussions...

(ex. "where are we heading with this?") you know where it's heading

4. NO plans made in advance

(that is why they're called the backup)

5. NO non-sexual gifts

(altoids not included) **I thought you knew ‘bout the mints**

6. NO baby talk

(however, dirty talk is encouraged)

7. NO asking for comparisons about former lovers

(in fact, no conversations are a plus)

8. NO kissing

(too intimate)

9. NO calling each other friends with benefits

(we're not friends and we never will be)

10. Calling out the wrong name during sex is okay

(who the hell are they to care)

11. NO extra clothing

(I don’t want your ass leaving anything behind that my real girlfriend/boyfriend might find)

12. NO guilt about falling asleep right after sex

13. Don’t be offended if I did’nt ask if you enjoyed it

(I didn’t care)

14. Never walk the person to the door or their car for any reason

15. If anyone asks, "Who was that?".... they're your roommate’s snag

16. Doggie style only

(rare exceptions when I am tired and let you ride)

REASON FOR DOGGY STYLE - the less eye contact the better. it destroys the purpose

17. never discuss these previously mentioned rules they are already agreed to in advance

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Form #2: The Pre-Booty Call Agreement Form

This pre-booty call agreement (hereinafter referred to as the "Agreement") is entered into on the

________ day of _________, 2002, between _________ and ___________.

THIS AGREEEMENT SHALL COVER THE FOLLOWING RULES AND PRINCIPLES:

1.No sleep over - unless it was good and we need to repeat it in the morning.

2.No meeting in public except for dinner or drinks before the events of the evening.

3.No calls before 9PM- we don't have shit to talk about.

4.None of that "lovemaking" shit. Only mind blowing sex allowed.

5.No emotional discussions-ex: Where are we heading with this? Do you love me?

The answer is no, so don't ask.

6.No making plans in advanced - that is why you are called the "back up", unless you are

from out-of-town, then it is a one time only advance arrangement.

7.All gifts accepted. Money is always good.

8.No baby talk, however, dirty talk is encouraged.

9.No asking for comparisons with former lovers-it's really none of your damn business.

10.No calling each other friends with benefits. We are not friends, just sex buddies.

11.Calling out the wrong name during sex is OK, don't be offended.

12.No extra clothing, I don't want your ass leaving anything behind when you leave.

13.Don't be offended if I dont ask if you enjoyed yourself, I don't care.

14.If anyone asks who you are, the standard response is: "My roomate's boyfriend/girlfriend".

15.Doggie style preferred-Just hit it hard and right or get the hell out.

16.Reason for Doggy-Style: The less eye contact the better.

17.We hook up absolutely whenever the mood strikes ME- So don't keep calling.

18. Bring your own drink I am not your liquor store.

19.No phone use, Please- Don't want anyone calling back looking for your ass.

EXTRA TIP FOR SUCCESSFUL BOOTY CALLS:

The aforementioned rules may only be altered by the holder of the agreement.

If the other party attempts to change or alter any terms of this agreement it will automatically

become null and void and you wilthen be removed from the BOOTY CALL LIST and deleted

from phone memory and email list. BLOCKED from all communications until your sill ass

understands the rules.

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Originally posted by phatman

...strip yourself of morality, conscience, and values..that should give you a good start...:aright:

Good call.

Yuck- I'd rather just play with my vibrator if this is what it came down to. :yuck:

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Originally posted by tastyt

Yuck- I'd rather just play with my vibrator if this is what it came down to. :yuck:

...honey...if it came down to that, you best be calling me for some puffing and loving...but hopefully you shouldnt have that problem for some time to come...;)

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Originally posted by dgmodel

how do you get that booty call, or that one night stand or that fuck buddy you have to leave right afterwards, as opposed to spending the entire night and having to see them in the morning and etc?

Don't you just know??? Before you make the call or get the call, there are people you just have sex with and there are people whose company you like before and after......

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Originally posted by dgmodel

oh i know... but i dont think she does... this one finds a comfy spot on my bed, takes the good pillow, even uses my toothbrush!!! wtf?! ive been trying to dead this entire activity for the longest just cant shake it...

once they get that comfy, there is no hope--you have to find and retrain a new one ;)

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Originally posted by dgmodel

oh i know... but i dont think she does... this one finds a comfy spot on my bed, takes the good pillow, even uses my toothbrush!!! wtf?! ive been trying to dead this entire activity for the longest just cant shake it...

why cant you be more with her? i thought you wanted a relationship?

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lol... done... and done... just sent this...

"...okay so i wake this morning from a not so pleasant dream, involving you and i, and i didnt like it... it was quite disturbing... so in order for these dreams not to turn to a reality, i think, actually i know we shouldnt participate in our drunken reindeer games anymore... no matter how bad either one of us talk or complain or try to persuade... outside from this dream, its not morally, or ethically right and bottom line is pretty much leading to nothing but trouble down the road... so in effort to salvage the remainder of our friendship, and our futures i think this is the best way to go... ttyl..."

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Originally posted by dgmodel

lol... done... and done... just sent this...

"...okay so i wake this morning from a not so pleasant dream, involving you and i, and i didnt like it... it was quite disturbing... so in order for these dreams not to turn to a reality, i think, actually i know we shouldnt participate in our drunken reindeer games anymore... no matter how bad either one of us talk or complain or try to persuade... outside from this dream, its not morally, or ethically right and bottom line is pretty much leading to nothing but trouble down the road... so in effort to salvage the remainder of our friendship, and our futures i think this is the best way to go... ttyl..."

What the fuck was that? :laugh: You're trying to be poetic while at the same time telling her you don't want to fuck her anymore . . . Please now, I'd find a way to fucking get back at you if I was a chick and you sent me something like that. :laugh: Maybe next time you can try talking to her as an adult rather then like shes 15 and awestruck at your daring good looks . . .

. . . :laugh: . . Thats prolly the best prick move I've heard in a year. . . Kinda sad if you ask me . . .

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