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sweetie029

Cheating...

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Originally posted by sweetie029

If you were in a serious relationship & your partner came clean to you & said they cheated is it something you would ABSOLUTELY NOT tolerate...or because you care for the person would you try to work it out ??

If he/she confessed, It shows they have a concience and respect you enough NOT to lie. So.... yeah, unless it bothers you so much that you bring it up everytime u fight.

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damn...good question....i will say that i wont tolerate it....i am not second plate to anyone, i should be the only person she should be having "relations" with...but then again i havent met THE ONE that would make me change my stance, but if that person WAS THE ONE...she would not have cheated on me...

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If they come clean, it means they can't deal with the guilt. Maybe they do care about you and don't want "hurt" you anymore than they have.... It's a hard call, it totally depends on the two people involed...Was it one night, one month, one year... Can yo honestly say you forgive and not use it as blackmail or to pick a fight. Some people can get over it and move one, some people hold on to as their reason for unhappiness....

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Originally posted by SPYGIRL2

If they come clean, it means they can't deal with the guilt. Maybe they do care about you and don't want "hurt" you anymore than they have.... It's a hard call, it totally depends on the two people involed...Was it one night, one month, one year... Can yo honestly say you forgive and not use it as blackmail or to pick a fight. Some people can get over it and move one, some people hold on to as their reason for unhappiness....

I totally agree with you.

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I make it very clear from the outset with a girl that I will NEVER cheat on them, because I won't. I tell them straight out, I would sooner come to you and tell you "Look, I can't do this anymore, I can't be faithful, we should break up". I've not had the need to do that yet though.............basically, I'd expect the same in return, so if they break that trust, even if they come clean after the fact...............see ya latah alligatah.

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IDK....If the person came clean & fessed up it MIGHT make it a little easier to forgive & move on...but by doing that you ultimately put yourself in a vulnerable position....setting yourself up to have something like this happen AGAIN...I would probably be able to forgive the person...but not be able to continue with the relationship...just end it on good terms

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Guest gabo

how about this...

what if you found out that your partner was cheating, they didnt even tell you about it you had to find out for yourself..... would you forgive them then?

thats what happened to me and i still forgave her. I was young and stupid, so was she.

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Originally posted by gabo

how about this...

what if you found out that your partner was cheating, they didnt even tell you about it you had to find out for yourself..... would you forgive them then?

thats what happened to me and i still forgave her. I was young and stupid, so was she.

Ya that happened to me too... and I forgave as well.. only to be cheated on again... so I ended it and it's a good thing I did.. cause I found out after it was over that he was cheating on me with a bunch of different girls :(

And now he's got a new girl and he's starting to do it to her too..

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Originally posted by ou812

I make it very clear from the outset with a girl that I will NEVER cheat on them, because I won't. I tell them straight out, I would sooner come to you and tell you "Look, I can't do this anymore, I can't be faithful, we should break up". I've not had the need to do that yet though.............basically, I'd expect the same in return, so if they break that trust, even if they come clean after the fact...............see ya latah alligatah.

That's my theory, if you have to even think about cheating, then end it with the person you are with. No one likes to be made a fool of, on purpose or by accident....

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Originally posted by ou812

I make it very clear from the outset with a girl that I will NEVER cheat on them, because I won't. I tell them straight out, I would sooner come to you and tell you "Look, I can't do this anymore, I can't be faithful, we should break up". I've not had the need to do that yet though.............basically, I'd expect the same in return, so if they break that trust, even if they come clean after the fact...............see ya latah alligatah.

:aright:

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Originally posted by gabo

how about this...

what if you found out that your partner was cheating, they didnt even tell you about it you had to find out for yourself..... would you forgive them then?

thats what happened to me and i still forgave her. I was young and stupid, so was she.

Maybe she was just stupid for ruining a good thing......;)

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Originally posted by vikkii123

Ya that happened to me too... and I forgave as well.. only to be cheated on again... so I ended it and it's a good thing I did.. cause I found out after it was over that he was cheating on me with a bunch of different girls :(

And now he's got a new girl and he's starting to do it to her too..

that is exactly how it works... thats why i say dont forgive for cheating. i think only a sucker or someone really down on themself would forgive someone who cheated on them, i dont care how much you "love" the person, if they cared they wouldnt have done it. why be in a relationship if youre gonna cheat, just be fuck buddies, thats how i see it.

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Originally posted by gabo

how about this...

what if you found out that your partner was cheating, they didnt even tell you about it you had to find out for yourself..... would you forgive them then?

thats what happened to me and i still forgave her. I was young and stupid, so was she.

Thats not cool :mad: If your gonna fuck up like that at least come clean with it...but people do come to moments of weakness & fall prey to temptation...but own up to what you do

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Originally posted by vikkii123

Ya that happened to me too... and I forgave as well.. only to be cheated on again... so I ended it and it's a good thing I did.. cause I found out after it was over that he was cheating on me with a bunch of different girls

thats why i say end it....what if they guy she is cheating with is having unprotected fun with other chics...and something is passed to ur partner...then she brings it to u? thats just one reason of ending things...forgiving? yea, with time...but i end that mess real quick....once u cheat, that person has lost respect for the relationship...and it should be terminated

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Originally posted by mrmatas2277

thats why i say end it....what if they guy she is cheating with is having unprotected fun with other chics...and something is passed to ur partner...then she brings it to u? thats just one reason of ending things...forgiving? yea, with time...but i end that mess real quick....once u cheat, that person has lost respect for the relationship...and it should be terminated

I totally agree... I mean you live and you learn.. and I've learned never to forgive a cheater!!!

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Originally posted by somebitch

that is exactly how it works... thats why i say dont forgive for cheating. i think only a sucker or someone really down on themself would forgive someone who cheated on them, i dont care how much you "love" the person, if they cared they wouldnt have done it. why be in a relationship if youre gonna cheat, just be fuck buddies, thats how i see it.

Once again what if it happened at the begining of a relationship, and lets say you are a few years into it? I mean would you break up for something that happened years before? what if they cheated on you and they were not in love with you at the time., But now you are both "In love"? that would be a tough situation. Personally I believe in forgiveness. After all no one is perfect....

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