words to live by

[dr.goodhead]

Personal Power in Action

(not titled by author)

A time comes in your life when you finally get it... When in the midst of

all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the

voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH!

Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child

quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder

once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle

of wet lashes you begin to look at the world through new eyes. This is your

awakening.

You realize that it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to

change, or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the

next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that in the real world

there aren't always fairy tale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and

that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you, and in the

process...a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect, and that not everyone will

always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are... and that's OK.

(They are entitled to their own views and opinions.) And you learn the

importance of loving and championing yourself, and in the process... a sense

of newly found confidence is born of self-approval.

You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you

(or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really

count on is the unexpected. You learn that people don't always say what they

mean or mean what they say, and that not everyone will always be there for

you, and that it's not always about you.

So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself and in the

process... a sense of safety & security is born of self-reliance. You stop

judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as

they are, and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties and, in the

process... a sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness. You

realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world

around you, is a result of all the messages and opinions that have been

ingrained into your psyche.

And you begin to sift through all the crap you've been fed about how you

should behave, how you should look, how much you shouldn't weigh, what you

should wear, where you should shop, what you should drive, how and where you

should live, what you should do for a living, who you should sleep with, who

you should marry, what you should expect of a marriage or what you owe your

parents. You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view.

And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really

stand for. You learn the difference between wanting and needing, and you

begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never

have bought into to begin with, and in the process... you learn to respect

your instincts.

You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive. And that there is

power and glory in creating and contributing, and you stop maneuvering

through life merely as a "consumer" looking for your next fix. You

learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated

ideals of a bygone era, but the mortar that holds together the foundation

upon which you must build a life.

You learn that you don't know everything, it's not your job to save the

world, and that you can't teach a pig to sing. You learn to distinguish

between guilt and responsibility, and the importance of setting boundaries

and learning to say NO. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you

choose to carry, and that martyrs get burned at the stake.

Then you learn about love; romantic love and familial love. You learn that

you will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable, or important

because of the man or woman on your arm or the child that bears your name.

You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would

have them be. You stop trying to control people, situations, and outcomes.

You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love... and you

learn that love is a verb, it is action.

And you look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact that you will

never be a size 5 or a perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the

image inside your head and agonizing over how you "stack up." You come to

the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness,

sensitivity, and respect, and

you will not settle for less.

And you allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you, to glorify you

with his or her touch... and in the process you internalize the meaning of

self-respect. And you learn that your body really is your temple. You

begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water, and taking more time to

exercise. You learn that fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt

and fear, so you take more time to rest.

And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels the soul, so you take more

time to laugh and to play. You learn that, for the most part, in life you

get what you believe you deserve... and that much of life truly is

a self-fulfilling prophecy.

You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for, and that

wishing for something to happen is different from working toward making it

happen. More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success, you

need direction, discipline, and perseverance. You also learn that no one can

do it all alone and

that it's OK to risk asking for help.

You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron

of all time: FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and through your

fears, because you know that whatever happens you can handle it, and to give

in to fear is to give away the right to live life on your terms. And you

learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of

impending doom. You learn that life isn't always fair, you don't always get

what you think you deserve, and that sometimes bad things happen to

unsuspecting, good people.

On these occasions you learn not to personalize things. You learn that God

isn't punishing you or failing to answer your prayers. It's just life

happening. And you learn to deal with evil in its most primal state - the

ego. You learn that feelings such as anger, envy, and resentment must be

understood and redirected, or they will suffocate the life out of you and

poison the universe that surrounds you.

You learn to admit when you are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls.

You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we

take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can only

dream about; a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a

long hot shower.

Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself... by yourself, and

you try to make yourself a promise-to never betray yourself. And you hang a

wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind.

And you make it a point to keep smiling, keep trusting, and to stay open to

every wonderful possibility.

Finally, with courage in your heart and with God by your side, you take a

stand, you take a deep breath, and you begin to design the life you want to

live, as best as you can.

--Author Unknown--

[~surreal~]

Beautiful...and so true.

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We are here only if you believe, but believe only if you are certain.