LatinaZee Posted February 12 Report Share Posted February 12 Originally posted by ou812 Get that mind outta the gutter Zee..........TM=Text Message WHAT? WHAT? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trewguy Posted February 12 Report Share Posted February 12 Originally posted by stardo no i was really trying whats one more weekend for a good buddies b-day:D i don't want to hear that shit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BRIAN1500 Posted February 12 Report Share Posted February 12 1. Tea bag - As you are sitting on a girl's face, repeatedly dip your> > scrotum in and out of her mouth, similar to a tea bag in a cup of hot> > water. An old favorite.> >> > 2. Hot Lunch - While receiving head from a woman, you shit on her chest.> > (a.k.a. the Cleveland Steamer)> >> > 3. The Stranger - Sitting on your hand until it falls asleep and then> > jerking off, eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone else.> >> > 4. Donkey Punch - Banging a girl doggy style and then moments before you> > cum, sticking your dick in her ass, and then punching her in the back of> > the head. This gives a tremendous sensation, but for it to workcorrectly,> > the girl must be knocked out so that her asshole tightens up.> >> > 5. Golden Shower - Any form of peeing on a girl. (aka: watersports)> >> > 6. Pearl Necklace - Well known. Whenever you cum on the neck/cleavagearea> > of a girl, it takes on the look of beautiful jewelry.> >> > 7. Coyote - This occurs when you wake up in the room o! f a nasty skank> > and you know you've got to give her the slip. However, you realize that> > your arm is wrapped around her. Therefore, you must gnaw off your ownarm> > to get out of this situation. Can be very painful.> >> > 8. Purple Mushroom - This occurs when a woman is giving you oral sex and> > you withdraw your penis in order to poke it back into her cheek. Itshould> > leave a lasting impression similar to a purple mushroom.> >> > 9. The Flying Camel - A personal favorite. As she is lying on her backand> > you are hammering her from your knees, you carefully balance yourself> > without using your arms to prop yourself up. You then to flap your arms> > and let out a long, shrieking howl. Strictly a class move.> >> > 10. Double Fishhook - From the doggy-style position, you hook your pinky> > fingers in her mouth and pull back to achieve deeper penetration.> >> > 11. The Ram - Again, you're attacking from behind, when you startramming> > her head against the wall in a rhythmic motion. The ! force of the wall> > should allow for deeper penetration. Very handy for those lulls inpenile> > sensitivity.> >> > 12. Dog in a Bathtub - This is the proper name for when you attempt to> > insert your nuts into a girl's ass. It is so named because it can bejust> > as hard as keeping a dog in the tub while giving it a bath.> >> > 13. The Bronco - Back to reality with this classic. You start by going> > doggy style and then just when she is really enjoying it, you grab onto> > her tits as tightly as possible and yell another girl's name. This gives> > you the feeling of riding a bronco as she tries to buck you off.> >> > 14. Pink Glove - This frequently happens during sex when a girl is notwet> > enough. When you pull out to give her the money, the inside of her twat> > sticks to your hog. Thus, the pink glove.> >> > 15. The Fountain of You - While sitting on her face and having her eat> > your ass, jerk off like a madman. Build up as much pressure as possible> > before releasing, spewing like a ven! erable geyser all over her face,> > neck and tits. (Better in her bed)> >> > 16. New York Style Taco - Anytime when you are so drunk that when you go> > down on her, you puke on her box. Happy trails!> >> > 17. Dirty Sanchez - While banging a girl doggy style, quickly stick 2> > fingers deep into her starfish, then reach around and wipe the residueon> > her upper lip, providing her a mustache.> >> > 18. Western Grip - When jerking off, turn your hand around, so that your> > thumb is facing towards you. It is the same grip that rodeo folks use;> > hence, western.> >> > 19. The Blumpkin - You need to find a real tramp to do this right. It> > involves having her suck you off while you're on the shitter.> >> > 20. The Bismark - Another one involving oral sex. Right before you are> > about to spew, pull out and shoot all over her face. Follow that with a> > punch and smear the blood and jism together.> >> > 21. Jelly Doughnut - A derivation of the Bismark. All you have to do is> > punch her in the ! nose while you are getting head.> >> > 22. Woody Woodpecker - While a chick is sucking on your balls,repeatedly> > tap the head of your cock on her forehead.> >> > 23. Tossing salad - Well known by now. A prison act where one person is> > forced to chow starfish with the help of whatever condiments are> > available, i.e. Jello, jism, etc> >> > 24. The Fish Eye - Working from behind, you shove your finger in her> > pooper. Thereupon, she turns around in a one-eyed winking motion to see> > what the hell you are doing.> >> > 25. Tuna Melt - You're down on a chick, lapping away, and you discover> > that it's her time of the month. By no means do you stop though. Whenthe> > whale spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face.> >> > 26. The Fur Ball - You're chomping away at some mighty Zena who has amane> > between her legs the size of Lionel Richie's afro, when a mammoth furball> > gets lodged in your throat. You punch her.> >> > 27. The Chili Dog - You take a dump on the g! irl's chest and then titty> > fuck her.> >> > 28. Gaylord Perry - Going to only one knuckle during an anal probe isfor> > wimps. Make this famous knuckle-ball pitcher proud and use multipledigits> > on that virgin corn hole. A minimum of 2 knuckles required (either onone> > finger or on multiple).> >> > 29. The Rear Admiral - An absolute blast. When getting a chick frombehind> > (with both partners standing), make sure you don't let her grab onto> > anything when she is bent over. Then, drive your hips into her backsideso> > that the momentum pushes her forward. The goal is to push her into awall> > or table, or have her trip and fall on her face. You attain the statusof> > Admiral when you can push her around the room without crashing into> > anything and not using your hands to grab onto her hips.> >> > 30. Glass Bottom Boat - Putting saran wrap over the skank's face and> > taking a dump.> >> > 31. Ray Bans - Put your nuts over her eye sockets while getting head.> > You're can is on her forehead! . Yes, it may be anatomically impossible,> > but it is definitely worth a try.> >> > 32. The Snowmobile - When plugging a girl while she's on all fours,reach> > around and sweep out her arms so she falls on her face.> >> > 33. The Dutch Oven - Also well known. Whenever you fart while humping,> > pull the covers over her head. Don't let her out until all movement> > ceases.> >> > 34. Smoking Pole - Self Explanatory. Don't use fire.> >> > 35. Rusty Trombone - Getting the reacharound while getting your salad> > tossed. Also known as milking the prostate.> >> > 36. Turkey Shoot - When you're coming, come on her face and let it drip> > off her chin so it looks like that red shit on the turkey's chin.> >> > 37. Stovepiping - Taking it in the Tush.> >> > 38. Rusty Anchor - After a healthy term of the Stovepiping, therecipient> > gets to enjoy a good fudgesicle.> >> > 39. Sandpiper - A stovepiping on the local beach, desert, or playground> > sandbox. Also known as the Sandblast.> >> > 40! . Lucky Pierre - the middle man in a three way buttfuck. Also knownas> > the french sandwich.> >> >> > 41.Divortex- A mystical place into which old friends are sucked when a> > married couple splits up.> >> > 42.Blump- To suck someone's dick while they are taking a dump.> >> > 43.Bustard- A very rude bus driver.> >> > 44.Cold Faithful- Blowing your visibly-steaming load outside in the> > winter-time, like when you get your cock sucked on a ski-lift.> >> > 45.Grand pappy smash- To beat your meat so hardcore that it starts to> > chafe and bleed.> >> > 46.Esplanade- To attempt an explanation while drunk.> >> > 47.Flatulence- The emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run> > over by a steamroller.> >> > 48.Butt Rodeo- When you're going at it with a girl, you flip her overreal> > fast, start ramming her in the ass and yell as loud as possible "BUTT> > RODEO!" You then see how long you can ride her till she tosses ya off!> >> > 49.Bargoyle- The hideous old hair-spray hag! who seems to live at your> > local watering hole. She usually smokes endlessly, spends hundreds of> > dollars a night on video-poker, and makes sexually threatening commentsto> > frightened college freshmen.> >> > 50.Pasteurize- Once you get her hairy bush pasteurize, you got itlicked!> >> > 51.Beerelevant- A point which does not seem to be particularlyimportant,> > given enough beer> >> > 52.Mangry- Describing the anger of women who are angry at men,> > specifically. "She's such a bitch, she's just plain mangry."> >> > 53.Clitourist- A man who won't stop and ask for directions in bed. ie:> > "Because of his fouled foreplay, Suzy realized that her new boyfriendwas> > no experienced bedroom traveler, but merely a clitourist."> >> > 54.Stuffucking- The act of "stuffing in" your limp, helpless member in> > hopes of getting it up. Potential causes: you're too drunk or she's too> > ugly. (see also; Fugly)> >> > 55.Antlers- Wide, flat, flapjack titties that come to a sharp point atthe> > nipple! s.> >> > 56.The Flying Camel- A personal favorite. As she is lying on her backand> > you are hammering her on your knees, you very carefully move forward and> > prop yourself (without using your arms) on your dick while it is still> > inserted in her vertical seafood taco. You then proceed to flap yourarms> > and let out a long shrieking howl, much like a flying camel. Strictly a> > classy move.> >> > 57.The Flaming Amazon- This one's for all you pyromaniacs out there.When> > you're screwing some chick, right when your about to cum, pull out and> > quickly grab the nearest lighter and set her pubes on fire, then> > extinguish the flames with your jizz!> >> > 58.The Screwnicorn -When a dyke puts her strap-on dildo on her forehead> > and proceeds to go at her partner like a crazed unicorn.> >> > 59.Split pissonality -When you're taking a leak and you get two streams> > out of the one hole!> >> > 60.A Short in the Cord- A "code" phrase used by the common man to referto> > Testicular Tendon Tangle S! yndrome. Ex. "Oh fuck! My nuts are killing> > me... I think I've got a short in the cord."> >> > 61.Old Jism Trail -The stream of semen oozing down the chin and chest of> > someone who has just finished fellating a senior citizen.> >> > 62.Abdicate -To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.> >> > 63.Lymph -To walk with a lisp.> >> > 64.Anal Boot- An anal boot is when you take a pitcher of beer, everyone> > spits in it, someone stirs it with their cock and then the mixture is> > poured through the crack of a man ass into the waiting mouth of theloser> > of a bet or drinking game.> >> > 65.Australian Death Grip- The act of grabbing a woman by the> > haunches/crotch and staring deeply into her eyes until you're slapped or> > kissed. A recommended tactic for very crowded bars. Another great> > opportunity for wagering among friends.> >> > 66.Fumilingus -When a man (or woman) performs cunnilingus on a woman and> > she farts directly in his/her face.> >> > 67.Intoxicourse- Having sexua! l intercourse whilst piss-drunk.> >> > 68.Valsalva -The act of pinching shut (with thumb and forefinger) a> > woman's nose while receiving fellatio; most effective when employed just> > prior to the release point due to the gag reflex and ensuing swallowthat> > the woman is forced to do to continue breathing. A great first dateploy,> > as it sets the stage for what the rules of engagement will be going> > forward.> >> > 69.Insta-gasm -Pre-mature ejaculation at the sight of a beautiful woman.> > ie: "She was so fine, I had an insta-gasm before I could get her clothes> > off!"> >> > 70.Manual Deconstipation -This is where you get out the hand cream andgo> > in manually for the hammerhead by breaking it into smaller chunks and> > pulling it out a piece at a time.> >> > 71.Post Poodum Syndrome -The feeling of depression felt after successful> > removal of a hammerhead. The excitement has passed, and you must nowfind> > something else to occupy your time.> >> > 72.The Homolic Maneuver -Using your pen! is to dislodge an objectblocking> > a choking victim's windpipe.> >> > 73.Pegging - having a female take you in the rear with a strap on.> >> > 74. The UnderDog - after a hard session at the gym, your armpit muscle> > begins to twitch; thus giving you the ability to jerk a guy off withyour> > armpit muscle.> >> > 75. The Twinkler - when you are 69ing a girl and you shove your dickinto> > mouth hard, and you watch her a-hole "twinkle" as she gags.> >> > 76. Angry dragon - This involves the girl giving the guy head and as heis> > about to cum slapping the girl on the back of the head causing the cumto> > come out her nose. Great care should be used to not slap her mouth shut.> >> > 77. Tony Danza - a takeoff of the donkey punch is called the Tony Danza.> > When you are about to cum while doing a girl from behind, you say "who's> > the boss?" and stick it in her ass. Before she says anything you shout> > "TONY DANZA!" and punch her in the back of the head.> >> > 78. Alaskan firedragon - an! other good take off is one of the angry> > dragon that is called the alaskan firedragon. When a girl is giving youa> > blowjob, cum in her mouth unexpectedly and plug up her mouth at the same> > time. Then whisper in her ear "i have syphilis" so she spews it out her> > nose.> >> > 79. The Walrus - when she's giving u a blowjob and u cum in her mouth> > unexpectadly, cover up her mouth and punch her in the stomach.> >> > 80. The Fat Lip - If you get poison ivy and finger a girl, her labialips> > will swell. A la, the fat lip.> >> > 81. Sleeping Bag - If you're going down on a really fat girl, you pullher> > enormous stomach roll of fat over your head.> >> > 82. Hummer Bird - when a girl is giving a guy a hummer, and he'senjoying> > it, she bites on his bird.> >> > 83. Bloody Mary - when a drunk guy is going down on a girl and without> > even realizing it after he's done, he realizes Mary was very Bloody> >> > 84. The Houdini - this maneuver is accomplished while going at it doggy> > style. A! s you feel you are about to cum, you pull out and spit on the> > small of her back (making her think you've finished...). It's at thepoint> > when she turns around when *BAM!* You bust your load in her face (in the> > eye if you've got proper aiming techniques down.) Also known as the Doug> > Hennings and the David Copperfield.> >> > 85. Upperdecking - This one takes practice. This maneuver requires a> > toilet with a tank above it, like the ones in most homes. Instead of> > crapping in the bowl, you shit in the tank (i.e. upperdecking). Nowdon't> > flush. When the following victim flushes, the rancid waste fills thebowl.> > If you play your cards right, it may ferment> >> > 86. Journey into darkness - This is the most disturbing of all. Itentails> > shitting into another person's asshole. Not for beginners.> >> > 87. Rocky Balboa - dont shower for 2 weeks, then diarrhea down herthroat> > at any point during sexual contact.> >> > 88. Rocky Balboa Title Punch - same as the Rocky Balboa, but in ! that> > non-showering 2 weeks all you eat is corn.> >> > I don't usually do this, but I have to give credit to Sascha and Zachfor> > the next 2. I'm only doing this because they are my bosses kids...> >> > 89. The McDonald's Quick Draw - Get your girlfriend to talk dirty intothe> > intercom, making the order guy start to beat off. Then while pulling upto> > the window, have her give you falatio till you are about to blow your> > beefy chunk-load. Upon pulling up to the window, tell your girl friendto> > yell "Draw!". Then on "three", both you and the guy blow your loadseither> > on her or eachother.> >> > 90. Uncle Jemima - the typical dirty chef at your local Denny's or other> > low-class food establishment who occasionally becomes disgruntled, and> > takes out his frustration on your meal, via "the ass wipe" or the"French> > Toast Strut" seen in Road Trip.> >> > 91. Airtight - this is where a girl has a cock in each of her threeholes,> > hence, airtight.> >> > 92. The Throne of Lightning - ! This is done by fucking a girl while you> > shit in a toilet. When you're going to blow your load, turn her over and> > dunk her head in the toilet, while she's bobbing for your turd plummet a> > river of semen in her ass. Not to be confused with "Ride the Lightning,"a> > Metallica album> >> > 93. Abe Lincoln - You're getting a girl up the ass and give her a swift> > donkey punch to the back of her head, knocking her unconscious. You then> > turn her around and jerk off and blow your load all over her face. Then> > you shave her beaver and take the clippings and spread it where youjizzed> > on her, making a beard that looks like good ol Honest Abe's.> >> > 94. Thanksgiving - Just like the holiday, Thanksgiving is when you do a> > girl and then she puts her two big butt cheeks on your face like holiday> > hams. An overcooked thanksgiving is similar to this but instead of just> > putting the cheeks on your head she farts on it too.> >> > 95. Emeril - When your'e doing a chick doggy style (either hole) a! ndyou> > pull out, cum in your hand and then while you throw it on her back you> > yell "BAM", Emeril style, hence the name.> >> > 96. Zombie - Right before you come while getting a blowjob, you withdraw> > from her mouth, and shoot her in the eye unexpectedly. This causes herto> > stumble about the room feeling around for a towel. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LatinaZee Posted February 12 Report Share Posted February 12 ahhhhhh!!THAT HURT JUST READING IT:mad: HEY....PULL MY FINGER!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stardo Posted February 12 Report Share Posted February 12 Originally posted by Reeni hey when are you coming to gazebo? im actually going to be in bayridge for valentines at the precinctim hanging out with the poor cops that have to work on valentines day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reeni Posted February 12 Report Share Posted February 12 lol idk what it is about bayridge cops but there soo hot:drool: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hdog Posted February 12 Report Share Posted February 12 you know it is bad when you have your pic posted under a thread called lets post useless crap! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stardo Posted February 12 Report Share Posted February 12 Originally posted by hdog you know it is bad when you have your pic posted under a thread called lets post useless crap! awwwww you wont think that way when hunnie puts that pic under hottie of the month next month suga plums:D REeni - I dont know but my girlfriends boyfriend is a bayridge cop and he is Lebanese and french. All i can say is mmmmm mmm mmm mmmm mmmm. He is so handsome. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeys24 Posted February 12 Report Share Posted February 12 700:D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hunnie818 Posted February 12 Author Report Share Posted February 12 Originally posted by joeys24 700:D Ha ha!!! You made it!!!! Congrats!!! (im still gonna kick your ass ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ninadd Posted February 12 Report Share Posted February 12 This cat is cool Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeys24 Posted February 12 Report Share Posted February 12 Originally posted by hunnie818 Ha ha!!! You made it!!!! Congrats!!! (im still gonna kick your ass ) thanks dollface:kiss2: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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