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lollie60

Someone Please Explain This SHit to ME !!!!

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I've been talking, hanigin out + flirting with this bartender at this one restaurant I always eat at since Febuary.

He offered to take me out, we talked on the phone couple of times, even made an attempt to goto the movies .

One time he asked me to spend the nite at his house but I didn't take his offer.

Last week after he got off work - we went to his place and had sex.

He tells me " I'm a great fuck and " I love fucking you".

But the thing is he said he is "seeing someone" - I'm assuming it's an open relationship becuz he fucked me.

So I call him Saturday morn to see if he's available for more fucking but he got other plans -

I tell him look - if you got a gf I'm not gonna chase after you . DO you want to see me again ? Yes or No ?

He says " You knew I had a gf- We'll talk about it . I don't want to say no

:mad:

Why didn't he tell me he had a GF - until I got to his house ? Why did he act like he was into me for one month before fucking me ?? I'm thinkin - since he flirted w/ me a month without saying he had a gf - he must not like her that much ?

I'm just sitting here laughing at myself for playing myself!! This type of shit happens to me ALL THE TIME with men I meet at clubs/bars !!!

Oh did I mention - after we finished fucking he tells me to keep it hush hush down at the bar he works at ! :rolleyes:

MEN IN NYC are soo fucked up !! (women too)

Nobody in this city has respect for relationships anymore !!

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Where are you from that you didn't see this coming? Obviously, especially from your final statement, you're not from around here. Here in the NYC region, you go to bars/clubs to hook up, not much else. You've got a better chance of finding a specific needle in a needle factory than finding a guy worth your time in our bars.

It's sad you had to learn this lesson in this particular way, but at least you learned and will know better next time.

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If this shit happened to me right after meeting him - then NO I don't need no explanation !!!

My question is - what kind of guy waits ONE MONTH - before going in for the kill ?

I live in suburban NJ where people are actually married, have kids, have a white picket fence drive a motherfuckin SUV !!

And I look at relationships like that and go try to find it in motherfuckin clubs/bars inNYC !!!

MAn - for once I acutally thought I was on the right track to a REAL relationship becuz I didn't fuck him on the first date !! HA HA HA HA !!!

:rolleyes: Now I'm back to where I started ! LOL - FUCKIN NYC Gotta Love IT !!! HA HA HA HA HA !!!

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he was an ass for not telling you he had a g/f before you went out.

but if he did tell you before you fucked.....

If he was a good fuck and you had fun, put it under the happy memory department and move the fuck on.

You know you could never have a relationship with him anyway because you would always think he was fucking around.

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Originally posted by trueqwest

Where are you from that you didn't see this coming? Obviously, especially from your final statement, you're not from around here. Here in the NYC region, you go to bars/clubs to hook up, not much else. You've got a better chance of finding a specific needle in a needle factory than finding a guy worth your time in our bars.

.

Well I know guys in clubs are looking for sex but I didn't expect a waiter/bartender who WAITED ON ME to do that shit too ...

SO you're saying I should never date a guy in a club ? I'd rather date guys into nightlife because I like a guy who knows how to have fun.

Around where I am the only men available I can date is the 33 yr. old mailman who still lives with his parents. :rolleyes:

Ok - I'm moving into Manhattan - anyone need a roommate ?

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Originally posted by shroomy

he was an ass for not telling you he had a g/f before you went out.

but if he did tell you before you fucked.....

If he was a good fuck and you had fun, put it under the happy memory department and move the fuck on.

You know you could never have a relationship with him anyway because you would always think he was fucking around.

GOOD call ! I wasn't looking for no relationship - I just wanted to fuck him again.

I HAD TO ASK HIM - " Do u have a gf ??" if I didn't ask he would probably never have said anything.

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Originally posted by lollie60

Last week after he got off work - we went to his place and had sex.

He tells me " I'm a great fuck and " I love fucking you".

Why didn't he tell me he had a GF - until I got to his house ? Why did he act like he was into me for one month before fucking me ?? I'm thinkin - since he flirted w/ me a month without saying he had a gf - he must not like her that much ?

I'm just sitting here laughing at myself for playing myself!! This type of shit happens to me ALL THE TIME with men I meet at clubs/bars !!!

Oh did I mention - after we finished fucking he tells me to keep it hush hush down at the bar he works at ! :rolleyes:

B]

Sounds like ya got played, typical nyc bartender move. Now are you going to keep your mouth shut or are you going to blow up his spot where he works. That'd be the evil to do, but sometimes things are better off left unsaid.

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No I'm not gonna blow up his spot. Not worth it .

And the funny thing is - he came across as a real down to earth nice guy not a hint of player .

I know a player when I see one. He didn't have any game, no lines, he was real down to earth and just nice then BOOM ! Out of no where shit hits the fan ! LOL

I actually thought he didn't get alot of pussy because he was very unpretentious. Excellant strategy I must say !!

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Originally posted by lollie60

No I'm not gonna blow up his spot. Not worth it .

And the funny thing is - he came across as a real down to earth nice guy not a hint of player .

I know a player when I see one. He didn't have any game, no lines, he was real down to earth and just nice then BOOM ! Out of no wherw shit hits the fan ! LOL

I actually thought he didn't get alot of pussy because he was very unpretentious.

so who cares... u got laid. was the sex good? if yes take it for what it was. if no, be happy u arent fucking him on a more regular basis. in the mean time, meet some more buddies, this way you arent in the position where you give a shit to play little games with guys who have girlfriends...

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Originally posted by lollie60

Well I know guys in clubs are looking for sex but I didn't expect a waiter/bartender who WAITED ON ME to do that shit too ...

hahah usually its the club employees (bouncers, bartenders, promoters, etc) that are the biggest playas of them all :laugh:

and trust me, this isnt just NYC.. this happens all the time.. everywhere

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Originally posted by nycchic24

hahah usually its the club employees (bouncers, bartenders, promoters, etc) that are the biggest playas of them all :laugh:

and trust me, this isnt just NYC.. this happens all the time.. everywhere

AMEN to that. :laugh2:

also, players always seem genuine, that is a big part of the game.

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Why would u turn down his offers to "even go to a movie" yet take the offer to spend the night @ his house knowing he already has a girl? Do u expect him to have respect for u or "a relationship"? And u say it always happens to u w/ men u meet at clubs/ bars? Damn is this your regular routine? Yuck!!!

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Originally posted by trueqwest

...Here in the NYC region, you go to bars/clubs to hook up, not much else...

gotta disagree with that.

i hear that all the time: "people in clubs are just sleazebags looking for ass." well, then does that make me one? my friends don't fall into that category, either. my friends in relationships have met each other when out at clubs; i think that whole "clubs are just for hooking up" line is only perpetuated by people who've been unsuccessful or who've been burned.

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Originally posted by hotbarbiedoll

Why would u turn down his offers to "even go to a movie" yet take the offer to spend the night @ his house knowing he already has a girl? Do u expect him to have respect for u or "a relationship"? And u say it always happens to u w/ men u meet at clubs/ bars? Damn is this your regular routine? Yuck!!!

I didn't turn down his offer to goto the movies. I turn down the offer to goto his house the FIRTS TIME !

He didn't tell me he had a GF til I got to his house.

And I don't fuck guys I meet at clubs all the time. Things never works out with guys I have met in clubs/bars.

DO YOU KNOW HOW TO READ ?

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Originally posted by lollie60

Around where I am the only men available I can date is the 33 yr. old mailman who still lives with his parents. :rolleyes:

:laugh: :laugh: I, too live in Jersey and i must say that....my one neighbor Charlie is 36 and yes...a mailman who lives at home with his parents.

Christ i soooooooo gotta get out of jersey before i become part of this "curse" thats on my street.

As far as yer "fucked the bartender" scenario.....

what i guess no one who posted thought of is: DAMN THIS GIRL MUST BE SMOKIN....

...or maybe just have a butta-face® and a tight pussy.

But straight-up..here's the deal....

You did and didn't get played.

If u turned down an offer to go to the his house the 1st time...yet accepted an offer to go to his house the 2nd time...then u should know that there is an increased risk that yer gonna get yer pussy fucked that night.

Now...what i wanna know is that....couldn't u tell from being at his house/apartment that he had a bitch? i mean they may live together so u didnt see anything obvious like maxi pads in the bathroom....tons of female haircare products in the bathroom....the tv remote set to fav. channels: Lifetime, Ch. 4, Ch 11, Ch. 7...or even if he didnt live with her im sure he fucks her in that same bed u got fucked in..and even more so...women usually have a scent or im sure perfume could be scented on the bed no?

ok even more so...the point of why he waited a month is because he was prolly contemplating wheather or not he really liked u or just really wanted to fuck u.

Now he prolly is having problems with his GF and has been weighing out the decision to break it off with her...co-incidentall while meeting u.

So he goes...and he decides to fuck u, only to see for himself...if he really is strong enough to emotionally detach himself from his current girl.

If he randomly fuck a girl...that says to him he has the confidence to move on and get rid of this nagging girlfriend of his.

BUT!!!!!

though u may be a good fuck..that could be all he see's in u.

Now granted he is definitely a good playa with fantastic game...cause for him to sweet talk u a month also means he really wanted that pussy.

There actually are belive it or not some genuine men left out there.

I consider myself one.

But there are also imposters who consider themselves one but really are scumbags.

Now his down to earthness and non-interest in sex was prolly because he was more interested to see if he could function normally outside of this relationship....so BAM!...he talks to u for a month and feels it out and says to himself "Wow....i can actually meet women" So once he feels this confidence then he wants to know "well ok...if i can talk to a girl while i have a girlfriend...i wonder if i can fuck one too cause then that just would tell me that i am worthy to meet another girl.

Reason being is that....for guys and girls..when they get deep into a relationship and sometimes almost "TOOOO DEEP" they feel trapped and lose tremendous confidence and feel basically like "shit...i wish i could break up with them so bad but i just can't...it would be too much of an emotional roller coaster."

Well my friend..you happened to be this bartender's emotional roller coaster...and he happended to take it for a ride.

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How can you tell I'm hot or buttaface/tightpussy by this post ? lol

He was a photographer - outside his bartending job. He took pics of fashion models and shit like that.

And I think he sweet talked to me for a month because he had had other pussy and was in no rush or he just played very cool and Smoooooooooooth.

He also told me his father died few years ago and that he enjoys snorting cocaine . YA think he got issues ?? LOL

I just think he's an inescure little boy who misses his father. I'm used to dating older MEN who know how to treat a woman.

I never knew how 2faced people can be til I actually hung out with him outside his bar. At the bar - he was soooo fuckin nice - then outside he did a complete 360 - like Dr. Jekeyll and Mr. Hyde.

And the fucked up thing is because he was soo smooth I can't even be mad at him.. LOL

What ever happenedo genuinely liking people ? DOes shit like that exist in NYC ???

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Originally posted by lollie60

Well I know guys in clubs are looking for sex but I didn't expect a waiter/bartender who WAITED ON ME to do that shit too ...

SO you're saying I should never date a guy in a club ? I'd rather date guys into nightlife because I like a guy who knows how to have fun.

Around where I am the only men available I can date is the 33 yr. old mailman who still lives with his parents. :rolleyes:

Ok - I'm moving into Manhattan - anyone need a roommate ?

I wouldn't seriously look for a relationship-type in bars or clubs.

Go to Bookstores, supermarkets, parks, etc... those are the best places to meet people who want a serious thing.

Bars and clubs are good for hooking up, and gettin some play. Maybe 1 out of 10 actually lead to true working relationships.

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