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housedog

I need some HELP

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OK I have got myself a little problem. I need some feedback on it.

I known this girl for the last 5 years, she use to go out with a friend of mine. They broke up at 2 different times in the last 2 years, this time it is over. They are having a messy breakup going to court and sueing each other. I am not tryin to get involed in any of that. I really don't hang out with the guy anymore. I have stayed in touch with her we go out like once a month to see Danny T. I also go to the bar she works at and hang out with her.

Ok about a year and a half ago I broke up with my girlfriend and she was broken up with him. I mentioned that we should get together, when we were rolling one nite but she kind of blew it off. Well Sat morning at the club. I opened my mouth again. I should of never taken the last hit, cause when I did, bam I spilled my guts, I told the girl everything. How I felt, how long I liked her, and all the other stuff to make myself look good. So this is going well and she said she likes me too. So all is going well, I really cannot believe I told her, I wasnt planning on telling her. It was I guess I got overwelmed with the hit and just started talking. We even talked about moving away. I think the girl is great and we get along so well.

What do I do about the guy? I have to tell him, he is going to go ape shit? Might even want to fight me, I hope not. But I think I should be the one to tell him, there is no need for him to hear from someone else. I am willing to lose the friend for the girl. I really don't hang out with him anymore, but we talk once in a while. But I am also scared, cause there is an unwritten rule about dating ex's but I dont really want to listen to it. I think this could work.

Now that I told her I want to pursue it, and I see a change in her too calling and texting me more. SO I think we are on th right track. Damm it ihas been a LONG time since I had butterflies in my stomach when I think about someone.

What do you think I should do?

Thanks

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Originally posted by housedog

OK I have got myself a little problem. I need some feedback on it.

I known this girl for the last 5 years, she use to go out with a friend of mine. They broke up at 2 different times in the last 2 years, this time it is over. They are having a messy breakup going to court and sueing each other. I am not tryin to get involed in any of that. I really don't hang out with the guy anymore. I have stayed in touch with her we go out like once a month to see Danny T. I also go to the bar she works at and hang out with her.

Ok about a year and a half ago I broke up with my girlfriend and she was broken up with him. I mentioned that we should get together, when we were rolling one nite but she kind of blew it off. Well Sat morning at the club. I opened my mouth again. I should of never taken the last hit, cause when I did, bam I spilled my guts, I told the girl everything. How I felt, how long I liked her, and all the other stuff to make myself look good. So this is going well and she said she likes me too. So all is going well, I really cannot believe I told her, I wasnt planning on telling her. It was I guess I got overwelmed with the hit and just started talking. We even talked about moving away. I think the girl is great and we get along so well.

What do I do about the guy? I have to tell him, he is going to go ape shit? Might even want to fight me, I hope not. But I think I should be the one to tell him, there is no need for him to hear from someone else. I am willing to lose the friend for the girl. I really don't hang out with him anymore, but we talk once in a while. But I am also scared, cause there is an unwritten rule about dating ex's but I dont really want to listen to it. I think this could work.

Now that I told her I want to pursue it, and I see a change in her too calling and texting me more. SO I think we are on th right track. Damm it ihas been a LONG time since I had butterflies in my stomach when I think about someone.

What do you think I should do?

Thanks

At this point there should be nothing wrong with seeing her. Especially if you and the guy are really not close. I mean I would not date a good friends Ex... But if you are not close with him. Than why not.

About telling him. I think that is the best bet. Cause people tend to react more harsh when they find out VIA someone else. Or by seeing it. Then it looks like you are being kinda shady and hiding it.

Question - Have you and the girl talked about being in a relationship. Or how you 2 actually feel after the night of the club. Cause X can sometimes cause 2 people to feel over emotional.

Obviously you know how you feel because you felt if before this night. But you have to be certain that is how she truly feels when she is not on anything.

I have been through it and I have seen it many times....

Anyway - Good luck...

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Take a chance.. many people encounter feelings like those, but they just choose not to take a chance on it, and its a waste ;)

I would go for it, talk to him first and see what he says...however i dont think he has any right to tell you no because theyre broken up for good and you two barely speak as of now...tell him yourself though before anyone else does or else he really will be mad.

i would also sit down and talk to this girl when you two ARENT ON ANYTHING and make sure you have everything set and straightened out, and also tell her that you're going to speak to him about it.

Good luck:)

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I think you should definietly tell your friend before you continue to persure things with this girl, especially after they've had a 5 year relationship. There is an unrwittin rule about dating ex's..but this relationship looks like it ended kind of messy, going to court and whatnot. I think you should definietly go for it.

And from experience, I've been in almost the same situation. Me and my one of my best friends were rolling one night and next thing i knew he was spilluing his guts to me, and i was telling him i had feelings for him too. I mean i did, but it the feelings werent strong enough that I wanted to act on them and have him know about just yet. But in your situation, that doesn't seem the case. You said she seems to be calling you more, that's good for business. This is a tricky situation, and I wish you the best of luck. Hope you get the girl.... ;)

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