tommyarmani Posted May 13 Report Share Posted May 13 I went through a time in my life where low self esteem caused me to not value the giving of myself to others & hence I was a bit whorish. My GF always makes this an issue & I regret my past & shouldn't have to be forced to relive my mistakes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastyt Posted May 13 Report Share Posted May 13 No, and thankfully it doesn't bother him either! Seriously though... what is considered a "high" # of partners varies from person to person... once you've crossed a certain threshold in someone's mind, it could very well change the way they look at you. And that's why you should never ask this question of your partner... unless you're actually willing to deal with the answer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastey Posted May 13 Report Share Posted May 13 hell, she should be glad she has such an experienced lover!anyway, girls NEED something to bitch about you and your relationship... and they need to talk about it to you AND their girlfriends. just give her something thats not so important that she can be upset about (like coming AT LEAST 20 minutes late to every meeting) ... and the issue you don´t want her to be upset about (your past) will quickly fade and be forgotten... you just gotta keep her busy being upset about other not so important things seriously, this works, as fucked up as it sounds Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brandy76 Posted May 13 Report Share Posted May 13 Originally posted by tommyarmani I went through a time in my life where low self esteem caused me to not value the giving of myself to others & hence I was a bit whorish. My GF always makes this an issue & I regret my past & shouldn't have to be forced to relive my mistakes. To ask the question to you, how would you feel if your gf said she was going thru a tough time/feeling down about herself & just slept with every guy, I'm sure you wouldn't like it either. IMO I wouldn't want a guy who slept with tons of girls just for the hell of it, especially since there's so many diseases out there & not just aids. Granted I'm sure many men have slept with more women than vice versa, but I'd rather him not have been a man whore.As someone already said, that ? about sexual partners should just not come up, it's always a sticky topic no matter what the answer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tommyarmani Posted May 13 Author Report Share Posted May 13 Brandy, thanks for your response. I am not proud of my troubled past. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dani672 Posted May 13 Report Share Posted May 13 luckily when my bf and i first met we had the same "habits" we both were open to eachother about it.. and things worked out.. here is a little story..so i had the hots for this guy for a while.. we "dated" for a few weeks here and there.. at the begining of the summer we had stopped talking.. then twords the midle of the summer i met my bf.. the first weekend we hung out he took me to tempts.. i had never been.. so we walk in and who do we see first thing is this guy.. right away.. i was like oh no.. he is going ot say something stupid...5 seconds later i see my bf's face light up and they are hugging!!! and then he was like oh.. hey dani you have to meet my good friend.. i was like.. um.. yeah i know him.. heeheethe moral of the story is.. be honest.. cause its a bigger problem if someone else says something... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetie029 Posted May 13 Report Share Posted May 13 The past is the past.....You can't change the # of partners or mistakes you made......As long as you are safe & check yourself out so your not putting yourself & your partner at risk of anything what should it matter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brandy76 Posted May 13 Report Share Posted May 13 Originally posted by tommyarmani Brandy, thanks for your response. I am not proud of my troubled past. It just seems like you want to hide behind the low self esteem part when it was just you being a horny typical guy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lollib Posted May 13 Report Share Posted May 13 Well, I have actaully slept with more people then my boyfriend and if it were the other way around, it would not bother me at all but for him, it's a different story. And he will ask things about my past and I'm honest and then he will get mad at me. Now, I didnt sleep too many people but I do wish the # was smaller but there are definitely people who have slept with more then me. Tell your girlfriend if she is going to try and make you feel guilty and bad about your past, which has nothing to do with her, then you cant be with someone like that. It isnt fair. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marcid21 Posted May 13 Report Share Posted May 13 when you start getting older, i think it's a give-in that your past is going to be somewhat *crowded*. That dosen't bother me.In fact, I recently dated someone who had a couple years on me...and his experience was somewhat interesting. He knew A LOT about women, and how to treat them....and even better, how their minds worked.Your personality/heart aren't reflected in numbers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
francismhwhite Posted May 14 Report Share Posted May 14 It can and will bother you a little but it shouldnt so if you care about the person then you put it passed you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sigmagal Posted May 14 Report Share Posted May 14 My boyfriend had 2 really long term girlfriends before we met. I have always had boyfriends but I didn’t stay with them that long ( I get bored easily) . My number is significantly higher than his and it really bothered him for a while. WE have been together for years now and all that happened before is in the past. We don’t ever get into it anymore. It took some time to forget but the more of a history that we made together developed, the less what came before mattered. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeg Posted May 16 Report Share Posted May 16 thats life... anyone with a squeeky clean past is lying.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djinnom Posted May 16 Report Share Posted May 16 ....and even better, how their minds worked. hahaha, he's in denial. That is an unachievable goal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djinnom Posted May 16 Report Share Posted May 16 Originally posted by tastey hell, she should be glad she has such an experienced lover!anyway, girls NEED something to bitch about you and your relationship... and they need to talk about it to you AND their girlfriends. just give her something thats not so important that she can be upset about (like coming AT LEAST 20 minutes late to every meeting) ... and the issue you don´t want her to be upset about (your past) will quickly fade and be forgotten... you just gotta keep her busy being upset about other not so important things seriously, this works, as fucked up as it sounds WOW. That's IS pretty fucked up. But strangely, it makes sense! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kkitten Posted May 16 Report Share Posted May 16 I now have a strict no ask no tell policy. There is no right way to answer this question so I don't. All that is important is that however high the number is, you were smart and protected yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
c-luv Posted May 16 Report Share Posted May 16 I stress about this sometimes, but I think its only normal. Especially when you know who some of the people are and see them around alot, thats what gets me most of the time... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scaredgirl Posted May 16 Report Share Posted May 16 Originally posted by brandy76 To ask the question to you, how would you feel if your gf said she was going thru a tough time/feeling down about herself & just slept with every guy, I'm sure you wouldn't like it either. well i dont know if is correct what i would answere but you are looking a perfect example of what you just said "ME"when i was in my teenage time 18 to be precise , i start my sexual life and also going thru a tough time so i was fixing everything with sex .... i wont give details but i have to say I DONT REGRET ALL OF THEM just a few oo and the answere to the question is : I dont care about my partner past ..... but he has some issues about mine ...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nSyNcBaBy Posted May 16 Report Share Posted May 16 Originally posted by joeg thats life... anyone with a squeeky clean past is lying.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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