dgmodel Posted December 21 Report Share Posted December 21 when you experience it, its a wonderful feeling... i cannot even articulate my thoughts about it, just curious if anyone has ever had an issue or lingering problem thats been looming for years and then out of nowhere theres closure... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iamme Posted December 21 Report Share Posted December 21 i hear ya. curious...is this related to a former significant other? those are the worst.i have had very little closure on too many things in my life. some pretty big. my sister went through a couple of the same things and she reacted pretty badly to them and it has changed her quite a bit...unforunately not for the best. these things can just knaw on you and your emotions for far too long. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magilicuti Posted December 21 Report Share Posted December 21 werd Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizlissa Posted December 21 Report Share Posted December 21 I don't know how to do closure.I've had some crazy things to deal since my memory pretty much starts, and I never learned to deal, I don't think you have skills to when you're so young.When bad things happen in my life I push them into a little dusty closet in the back of my brain and promptly forget how to get there again.This is incorrect. The therapist says, "Melissa, you better believe you WILL deal with these issues if you haven't yet."Perhaps this is why I spent a few years partying and moving/schooling all over the place.Greatest lesson I learned though, "wherever you go, there you are." Can't escape yourself.Closure, still haven't quite attained. Cause I still can't find that damn closet. I think I'm at least in the right hallway now, though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dgmodel Posted December 21 Author Report Share Posted December 21 Originally posted by iamme i hear ya. curious...is this related to a former significant other? those are the worst.i have had very little closure on too many things in my life. some pretty big. my sister went through a couple of the same things and she reacted pretty badly to them and it has changed her quite a bit...unforunately not for the best. these things can just knaw on you and your emotions for far too long. no in regards to different issue regarding a family member... however there was a girlfriend of mine who i was madly in love with and at the time the feeling was mutual, and due to poor timing and a few other factors we seperated it always was hard for me to deal with and at some times now i reminisce however i attained closure with her not too long ago (maybe a year or so) and the next day it felt as if the weight of the world was lifted off my shoulders and for the first time in years i felt alive... its a crazy thing to read, and believe me its a crazy thing to say but those who can relate know exactly what i mean... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dgmodel Posted December 21 Author Report Share Posted December 21 Originally posted by mizlissa I don't know how to do closure.I've had some crazy things to deal since my memory pretty much starts, and I never learned to deal, I don't think you have skills to when you're so young.When bad things happen in my life I push them into a little dusty closet in the back of my brain and promptly forget how to get there again.This is incorrect. The therapist says, "Melissa, you better believe you WILL deal with these issues if you haven't yet."Perhaps this is why I spent a few years partying and moving/schooling all over the place.Greatest lesson I learned though, "wherever you go, there you are." Can't escape yourself.Closure, still haven't quite attained. Cause I still can't find that damn closet. I think I'm at least in the right hallway now, though. you say young, simply out of curiousity how old are you? as for the second part the partying, thats exactly how i dealt with my situation regarding one of my ex's i drank it away, but only to find that once i ran out of liquor the prob was still there... the best way to cope or over come is it accept and move on... bottom line, like you said you cant escape yourself, you can hide, you can avoid but no matter where you go or in what state of mind youre still you... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizlissa Posted December 21 Report Share Posted December 21 Originally posted by dgmodel you say young, simply out of curiousity how old are you? as for the second part the partying, thats exactly how i dealt with my situation regarding one of my ex's i drank it away, but only to find that once i ran out of liquor the prob was still there... the best way to cope or over come is it accept and move on... bottom line, like you said you cant escape yourself, you can hide, you can avoid but no matter where you go or in what state of mind youre still you... I'm 22. My life has been a lil' wacked since I was 1, basically all of my memory. My father's struggled with liver, kidney, colon, and a million other diseases that almost took him from us 3 times, so my whole life has sort of ridden on a shifting tide of dad's sick, dad's okay, dad almost died, dad's okay.I think the fact that he always would get at least improved just made me think that everything in life was that way, so I just don't deal with things and expect them to get better eventually. Which is probably why I think my grandparents are just on a very extended vacation, lol..Hence, who needs closure if things will make themselves better.Which is horribly flawed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghhhhhost Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 shit im sorry.its crazy how u think u have problems until something serious comes up.....something that dwarfs all of the lil problems u had before. i just realized that this year...everything becomes secondary or tertiary...ur primary thoughts r fixated on the problem at hand..and it seems to get worse and worse as the days go on. sux ass Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
siceone Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 clousure is just a masochistic need for being hurt on more time by the person that we thought loved us but really didn't so that they can hammer in that fact so that we can let go of all that is good inside us that we once associated with our fomer significant other. Closure is to make up for the weakness inside us all; to make up for the lack of strength needed to pull the cold sinewy fingers of anguish and bitter needing that the empty void in our once warm beds has created. Closure is just a reminder of our own failings. But more importantly a warning that our warm little heart are not impervious and that they will be made to bleed over and over by people we love. Closure is the burning reminder in the back of our skulls of our human weakness and a reminder of the need for a purging of fire in order begin again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iamme Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 humans have lots of problems. we're fucked up in the head. and the drugs dont help Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
solbeam Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 Originally posted by iamme humans have lots of problems. we're fucked up in the head. some more than others...it is better to walk away with closure than to live with the burden of the past...I'm learning that now more than ever Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizlissa Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 Originally posted by iamme humans have lots of problems. we're fucked up in the head. and the drugs dont help unless it's of the kind prescribed by a licensed professional.siceone, without closure though blood would just continue to purge itself from the heart until it shriveled up.. and we were incapable of feeling much of anything.. at least when we come to terms with things, sure we can prepare ourselves for more potential loss/pain, but we also allow room for things that will possibly enhance our lives and make it positive.so i guess it is necessary. I wonder if.. the sooner you are able to get over things, the better? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghhhhhost Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 thats the only way to go about it...i learned the hard way..just say fuck it..and move on..."bad day..fuck it" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizlissa Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 correction: the sooner you are able to bring closure to things, the better?i/e the case of a loved ones death, etc. How do you really do that? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
solbeam Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 Originally posted by mizlissa correction: the sooner you are able to bring closure to things, the better?i/e the case of a loved ones death, etc. How do you really do that? In terms of death, can that kind of closure be forced? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizlissa Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 Originally posted by ghhhhhost thats the only way to go about it...i learned the hard way..just say fuck it..and move on..."bad day..fuck it" lolSeen the movie Memento?clean slate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghhhhhost Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 Originally posted by mizlissa correction: the sooner you are able to bring closure to things, the better?i/e the case of a loved ones death, etc. How do you really do that? its kinda fucked up to say..but ive seen first hand where people just want the person to die because it would ease the suffering on everyone around them...as much as u may love that person...the suffering their dying may cause will never parallel the relief felt upon that individuals death. u can chastise me all u want for this...but im all for euthanasia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghhhhhost Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 Originally posted by mizlissa lolSeen the movie Memento?clean slate. i wish life had a restart button Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
solbeam Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 Originally posted by ghhhhhost i wish life had a restart button seriously but with my luck i'd end like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day...living the same fucked up day over and over... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghhhhhost Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 ahahhaah...i hear that shit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizlissa Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 Originally posted by solbeam seriously but with my luck i'd end like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day...living the same fucked up day over and over... :laugh: so is the lesson to be happy with what we have because surely it's better than that?Ashton Kutcher has a movie coming out next year called "Butterfly Effect," that sounds reallly good. My roommate saw the preview for it when he went to see the LOTR, I guess in the movie Ashton's girlfriend dies and somehow he's given the ability to go back in time and change things, but each time he does, things get worse.. she still dies but I guess each time things get more fucked up and she dies in a more horrible way.. like the second time she's addicted to drugs, and more friends die...okay this is a horrible synopsis. But it seemed relevant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fineones Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 i just saw this thread...and recently ive been thinking about it allot..i actually im very good with 'closure' and 'moving on' but i wish other ppl were the same way....it would make life so much easier and relieve all the stress on the situation...everyone in my family is that way and i hate it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fineones Posted December 22 Report Share Posted December 22 i just saw this thread...and recently ive been thinking about it allot..i actually im very good with 'closure' and 'moving on' but i wish other ppl were the same way....it would make life so much easier and relieve all the stress on the situation...everyone in my family is that way and i hate ithaha get over it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glowgrlnyc Posted December 23 Report Share Posted December 23 Originally posted by ghhhhhost its crazy how u think u have problems until something serious comes up.....sux ass exactly....everytime I think I have a problem or just depressed about something....I think about my father losing the battle to cancer....and just with that one single thought...I realize I have NO PROBLEMS at all... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iamsamurai Posted December 23 Report Share Posted December 23 Wurd, no problems, only challenges. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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