fouroneone Posted February 5 Report Share Posted February 5 Kaydup -How many comps and drink tickets did they give you to make that flyer? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stymie Posted February 5 Author Report Share Posted February 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unclefester401 Posted February 5 Report Share Posted February 5 Originally posted by stymie Girl: HiBoy: helloBoy: who is this?Girl: just a someone?Boy: A someone I know?Girl: nopeBoy: Then why the hell are you bothering me?Girl: well sorrrrrryGirl: I just wanted to chat with youBoy: why?Girl: nevermind your an assholeBoy: Hey wait a minuteGirl: yes?Boy: look I'm sorry. I'm just a little paranoidGirl: paranoid?Boy: yesGirl: of what?Girl: me?Boy: No. I'm in hiding.Girl: LOLBoy: Don't fucking laugh at me!Boy: This shit is serious!Girl: What are you hiding from?Boy: The cops.Girl: gimme a fucking breakBoy: I'm serious.Girl: I don't get itBoy: The cops are after me.Girl: For what?Boy: I'm wanted in three statesGirl: For???Boy: It's kindof embarrasing.Boy: I had sex with a turkey.Boy: Hello?Girl: You are fucking sick.Boy: Send me your picture.Girl: why?Boy: so I know you aren't one of them.Girl: One of what?Boy: The cops.Girl: I'm not a cop i told youBoy: Then send me your picture.Girl: hold onBoy: Hurry up.Boy: Are you there?Boy: fuck you, cop!Girl: Hey sorryGirl: I had to do something for my mom.Boy: I thought you were trying to find a picture to send to me.Boy: When really you were notifying the authorities.Boy: Weren't you!?Girl: thats not itBoy: Then what?Girl: I don't want to send you the picture cause I'm not prettyBoy: Most cops aren'tGirl: IM NOT A FUCKING COP YOU DICKHEAD!Boy: Then send me the picture.Girl: fine. What's your e-mail?Boy: Just send it through here.Girl: alright *PIC*Girl: Did you get it?Boy: Hold on. I'm looking.Girl: That was me back in mayGirl: I've lost weight since then.Boy: I hope soGirl: what?!?Girl: that hurt my feelings.Boy: Did it?Girl: Yes. I'm not that much smaller than that now.Boy: Will it make you feel better if I send you my picture?Girl: yesBoy: Alright let me find it.Girl: kksBoy: Okay here it is. *PIC*Girl: this isn't you.Boy: I'll be damned if it ain't!Girl: You don't look like that.Boy: How the hell do you know?Girl: cause your profile has another picture.Boy: The profile pic is a fake.Boy: I use it to hide from the cops.Girl: You look like the Farm Fresh guy lolBoy: Well, you look like you ATE the Farm Fresh guy....Boy: Not to mention all the groceries.Girl: Go fuck yourselfBoy: I was going to until I saw that pictureBoy: Now my dick won't get hard for a week.Girl: I shouldn't have sent you that picture.Girl: You've done nothing but slam me.Girl: you hurt me.Boy: And calling me the Farm Fresh guy doesn't hurt me?Girl: I thought you were bullshitting me!Boy: Why would I do that?Girl: I can't believe that cops are after youBoy: I can't believe Santa lets you sit on his lap..Girl: FUC YOU!!!Boy: You'd break both of his legs.Girl: You're a FUCKing asshole.Girl: I've been teased my whole life because of my weightGirl: and you make fun of me when you don't even know meBoy: Ok. I'm sorry.Girl: No you aren'tBoy: You're right. I'm not.Boy: HAARRRRR!Girl: I'm done with youBoy: Aww. I'm sorry.Girl: I'm putting you on ignoreBoy: Wait a secBoy: We got off on the wrong foot.Boy: Wanna start over?Girl: NoBoy: I'll eat your pussyGirl: You'll what?Boy: You heard me.Boy: I said I'd eat your pussy.Girl: I thought you said you couldn't get it hard after seeing my pictureBoy: Do I need a hard-on to eat your pussy?Girl: I'd like to know that the man eating me out is excited yesBoy: Well I'm not like most men.Boy: I get excited in different ways.Girl: Like what?Boy: Do you really wanna know?Girl: I don't knowBoy: You have to tell me yes or no.Girl: I'm afraid toBoy: Why?Girl: causeBoy: cause why?Girl: well lets seeGirl: you say you have sex with turkeys. You call me fat. then you wanna eat me utGirl: doesn't that seem strange to you?Boy: NopeGirl: well its strange to meBoy: Fine. I won't do it if you don't want me toGirl: I didn't say thatBoy: So is that a yes?Girl: I guess so.Boy: Ok. I need your help getting excited though.Boy: Are you willing?Girl: What do you need me to do?Boy: I need you talk like a pirate.Girl: ???Boy: When I start to go limp... you say "HARRRR!!!"Boy: ok?Boy: Hello?Girl: You can't be seriousBoy: Oh yes I am!Boy: It's my fantasy.Girl: this is retardedBoy: Do you want it or not?Girl: Yes I want it.Boy: Then you'll do it for me?Girl: sureBoy: Ok. Here we go.Boy: I gently remove your panties and being to massage your thighs.Boy: You get really juicy thinking about my tounge brushing up against themBoy: I softly begin to tounge your wet pussy.Boy: I run my tounge up and down your smooth slit.Girl: mmmm yeahBoy: uh oh ...going limp.Girl: HarBoy: You gotta do better than that!Boy: Your picture was really bad.Girl: HARRRRRRRRRRRRBoy: Ahhhh. Much better. I feel your pussy get more moist with every stroke.Boy: I softly suck on your clit bringing it in and out of my mouth.Boy: Your juices run down my chin as your scent makes its way to my nose.Boy: I begin to feel empowered by your femininity.Girl: mmmmmm you are goodBoy: I feel your thighs tighten as I suck harderBoy: going limpGirl: HARRRRRRRBoy: Mmmm I grab your swelling buttocks in my hands.Boy: You begin to sway back and forth.Boy: going limpGirl: this is stupidBoy: ...still limpBoy: Do it!Girl: HARRRRRRRRRRRRRBoy: I turn you around to lick your asshole.Boy: I pry apart that battleship you call your ass.Boy: I see shit nuggets hanging from the hair around your asshole.Girl: WTF?!?!?Boy: They stink really bad.Girl: OMG STOP!!!Boy: I start to get fed up with your ugly assBoy: I tear off your wooden peg leg.Boy: I ram it up your ass.Girl: YOURE A FUCKING PYSCHO!!Boy: Then I pour hot carmel over your head.Boy: And turn you into a fucking candy apple...Boy: I kick you in the face!Girl: FUCK YOU ASSHOLE!!Boy: The celluloid from your cheeks hits the side of the cabin...Boy: Your parrot flys away.Boy: ...going limp again.Boy: Hello?Boy: Say it!Boy: HAARRRRRR!!!!!!!!!! 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ras67 Posted February 5 Report Share Posted February 5 argh.... not again!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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