blueangel Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 be close friends (platonic friends) after a night of casual sex??I don't think that's possible. How can a guy and girl look at each other in a platonic way after that? I mean don't get me wrong . . . I think a guy and a girl can be best friends without the sex thing getting in the way but once you DO cross that sex line . . . there is no more platonic after that, RIGH?? What do you guys think?BlueAngel------------------“Life is the childhood of our immortality." -Goethe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stacychase Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 i think that they can. as a matter of fact, i have a VERY good friend... we took a roll in the hay a couple of times, GREAT SEX... however now we are great friends.. he introduces me to all of his new girlfriends, etc... i do not look at him as an old sex partner, and do not get jealous of him or anything. i think that you both have got to be very, very mature about the whole situation! i would hate to loose him as a friend. however if you want more from that person, i do not recomend trying anything together.------------------Life can only be understood backward, but it must be lived forward. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sariman Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 Personally I don't belive in platonic friendships of any manner between two straight people. Women and men are attracted to each other sexually by nature. The fact that your friends means that your 50% of the way to having a good relationship. Now with a good mature self-control you can control yourself and be just friends, but it's easy to let that guard down. Hell after sex I think it would get even worse. After sex you just couldn't look at the person the same way. I know a million people are going to disagree with me, but you should know first that I have a TON of women friends. Just because they are my friends doesn't mean that I could never see us in a sexual relationship.//sariman------------------P eaceL oveU nityR espect"Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die today!" -- James Dean Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SPHERIC Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 I think it depends on the two people involved, and the level of friendship prior to the actual sex. Although most of the time one of the parties involved probably wanted it to happen for a different reason than the other. It is a very cool thing if both parties are at a level where they can seperate the physical pleasure from the mental commitment! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cesarleo Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 I'm with stacychase on this one. Sounds same as i was thinking although the only GREAT SEX Iv'e had with girls i was friends with were simply ex's...and i don't recommend that!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myrlin Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 AH. This is a good topic.Alright, my opinion.This all comes down to one thing. Honesty. Simply put, as long as the two said people are honest with each other about the situation, you can figure the situation out.If you both agree (and i dont mean on the surface, i mean truly agree) that you do not have emotional attachments to each other, then you can do both.If one or the other, cannot handle the situation because they DO have emotional attachments, then you cannot do both.If one or the other cannot handle the situation at all after the incident, then you cannot do either.Now granted, this isnt a black and white case scenario but this is my opinion. Its a very touchy subject. There are only three real ways for it to end. Either you stay friends, become an "item" or you dont hang out much afterwards.However, I like to think to think that you have to take a shot if you want to, simply because its worse to NOT know then to KNOW. Truth has its merits, no matter how painfull it is. ------------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sariman Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 I think Myrlin has a point. If both people agree... and truly agree not half-ass agree... that this is sex for pleasure and not sex for love then it could work out and friendship could resume as normal. The problem is that most people aren't honest with themselves. //sariman------------------P eaceL oveU nityR espect"Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die today!" -- James Dean Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
edge420 Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 i think so. but maturity is key, #1, and both parties have to have more or less the same level of interest in the other, #2. meaning, one person can't be head over heels while the other is indifferent. i actually beleive that sometimes not having sex makes things worse. tensions build up and there's no outlet. once that obstacle is overcome you can focus on the other more important aspects of the friendship. i know i for one can have sex with someone and then just be friends as long as it's not someone i'm interested in having more of a relationship with. if that's the case it's best not to have sex so that i/they don't get hurt. unless of course they look like elizabeth hurley... then suck it up and do the deed LOL.------------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stacychase Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 thanks myrlin, you sais it better than me. i agree with you completely.------------------Life can only be understood backward, but it must be lived forward. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
risa06 Posted December 27 Author Report Share Posted December 27 I think they def CAN....as long as they can put what happend behind them and they don't think of eachother as "friends w/ benefits"...they will be friends..... I'm sure...Lola------------------"I don't want you to love me........" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dstgeorge2 Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 Yes I belive they can, but it must be stated before that the sex is just that sex. But if one (or both) of the 2 people has deeper feeling for the other this will just cause them pain. Almost as if you where playing with thier heart.Dan------------------"You all laugh at me becasue I'm differant, I laugh at you because your all the same." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bungee Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 OK, not being cocky here but once I bang a girl, that's all she would think about when we hang. She would find sneaky little ways to get me back to her place and bang again. Then either she wants to get married or us be 'bang' buddies. Then she starts crying and that's when I say bye bye to the banging. So the answer to your question is 'NO', not possible.------------------Sticks and Stones may break my bones..but..words..can't..hurt..meeeee...so there Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carabee Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 Of course its possible. Maturity is the Key word! If you trust someone and you need to get a little crazy and you can both understand that afterwards there should be no discomfort than, go for it. But to a lot of peeps, crossing that line means never goin back......you have to really be honest.My love lay in the fault of my palm....I looked around and saw how it longed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
princess0621 Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 Most people start out as friends before it progresses to something more which it usually does but hope that it doesn't fall apart otherwise you lose what was a good friend.------------------ <A HREF="/cgi-bin/redir.cgi?url=http://members.tripod.com/~gifs123/tigger.gif" TARGET=_blank>http://members.tripod.com/~gifs123/tigger.gif</A> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SPHERIC Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 Originally posted by risa06:I think they def CAN....as long as they can put what happend behind them and they don't think of eachother as "friends w/ benefits"...they will be friends..... I'm sure...Lola[/quoteYou sound as if this has happened with you???? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myrlin Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 Originally posted by carabee:Of course its possible. Maturity is the Key word! If you trust someone and you need to get a little crazy and you can both understand that afterwards there should be no discomfort than, go for it. But to a lot of peeps, crossing that line means never goin back......you have to really be honest.Exactly. Problem with alot of people nowadays, if you see my occasional rants, is that its non existant. People are afraid to be honest, afraid to hear the truth and being mature sometimes puts you on the bad side. Honestly truly makes many things better. You cannot be honest 100% of the time, I wont say that but you sure as hell can make situations better. We are all guilty of not saying everything from time to time but as often as you can, do the best you can. **grins** ------------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blueangel Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 Originally posted by myrlin:If one or the other, cannot handle the situation because they DO have emotional attachments, then you cannot do both.But our emotions are not always that clear in our minds all the time, Claudio. What if you really meant it when you said I can handle it. And you really want the friendship to just stay as friendship. But how can you hang out with her/him and continue being very close friends without EVER thinking back at the THE NIGHT. I just don't think it's possible.Once the sex comes into play . . . you can't go back to being PLATONIC friends.BlueAngel------------------“Life is the childhood of our immortality." -Goethe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artful Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 It depends on the respective personalities of the parties involved as well as ideally sitting down and honestly discussing the proposition.I'd submit that if you find the other person especially attractive that you'd need a couple of those "sessions" to kinda work them outta your system.......just as a reality that does exist.(an example of one of many things)And I also submit that it depends on the connection the two of you share within that friendship. Not every friend is put into the same catagory. You have friends that are closer to being an acquaintance...friends that you pour your heart out too... and there's also that inexplicable bond that is like a link that some people share. Some consider this a form of karma.A cute friend is probably the best or one of the best one-night-stand possibilities... simply because there is a level of comfortability that is established that you would not have with a complete stranger.The easiest to walk away from would probably be when there's no sexual chemistry. Yes yes... you may have been attracted to one another to a point initially, but after the thing's over with you may no longer desire sex with him/her.I think this would be the ideal situation to going back to a friendship. Been there, done that, and you're not especially looking to do it again.....But there are probably as many realities in this area as there are varieties in people.So, yes, it is possible. If it is possible for you, should such a situation arise? , well you'll find that out AFTER....------------------ <I'm a Fire-starter><Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee!!> <I got the glow, baby!!Can ya feel it?!? Now back up and give me some dancin' room!!>--- When the Artful speaks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the-id Posted December 27 Report Share Posted December 27 no, at least not close friends------------------No bullshit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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