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The all-new Florida Barbie Doll


Guest slamminshaun

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Guest slamminshaun

Mattel recently announced the release of limited edition Barbie dolls for the South Florida market.

Boca Raton Barbie

This princess Barbie is only sold at the Town Centre Mall. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired foreign lap dog named Honey, a cookie cutter dream house with lawn service. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic ex-husband Ken comes with a Porsche.

Coral Springs Barbie

This modern-day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar minivan and matching gym suit. She gets lost easily and has no full-time occupation or secondary education. Traffic Jamming cellphone sold seperately. Can swear in English and Spanish. Available at Target.

Riviera Beach Barbie

This recently parolled Barbie is available with 9mm handgun, a bowie knife, a '78 El Camino with dark tinted windows and a meth lab kit. This model is only available after dark and can only be bought with cash, preferably small bills, unless ur a cop, then we don't know what ur talking about.

Acreage Barbie

This model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a classic Metallica t-shirt and a tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She comes with a six pack of Coors Light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's ass when she's drunk. Purchase her pick-up truck seperately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free. Available at Big Lots and Dollar General Stores.

Palm Beach Barbie

This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card set and country club membership. Also available are Shallow Ken and Spanish-speaking Nanny.

Lake Worth Barbie

This tobacco chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased Beer-gut Ken out of Lake Worth Barbie's house(discontinued). Her emsemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, strawberry lipgloss and a see-through halter top. Comes with Barbie's Dream Double-wide Trailer. Available at Walmart...cheap.

Ft. Lauderdale Barbie

This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie wears leopard print Spandex and drinks cosmopolitans to new age music with friends at the martini bar. Comes with percocet prescription and botox injections.

Lantana Barbie

This Barbie now comes with a stroller, infant doll and bible. Optional accessories include a G.E.D. and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his '79 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant. Available at any Christian bookstore.

Delray Beach Barbie

Is pregnant, drives a new Ford Excursion, and is perfect in every way. Worships the sun by day and strolls down Atlantic Avenue by night. We don't know who Ken is because he's always in North Florida or Georgia on hunting or business trips. Delray Barbie aspires to be Boca Raton Barbie. Not cheap, but, still very naive.

South Beach Barbie/Ken

This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or subtracting "snap-on" parts.Likes to experiment. Comes with bikini and club wear(sunglasses can be worn with both). Techno music collection and glow sticks included. South Beach Rave Club sold seperately for all night fun!

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Guest r3nz0

Conservative Barbie

This princess Barbie is specifically targeted for fags' date=' such as Shaun, who are not only very conservative in their political views, but also love the cock like it's going out of style. This Barbie comes with its own penis, which can easily be placed in her mouth for pure sucking bliss. This is the gift a whole family can enjoy. Batteries not included.[/quote']

Wow! :o

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Guest lulamishka

Conservative Barbie

This princess Barbie is specifically targeted for fags, such as Shaun, who are not only very conservative in their political views, but also love the cock like it's going out of style. This Barbie comes with its own penis, which can easily be placed in her mouth for pure sucking bliss. This is the gift a whole family can enjoy. Batteries not included.

Wow! :o

LOLOL!! :D

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Guest slamminshaun

Conservative Barbie

This princess Barbie is specifically targeted for fags, such as Shaun, who are not only very conservative in their political views, but also love the cock like it's going out of style. This Barbie comes with its own penis, which can easily be placed in her mouth for pure sucking bliss. This is the gift a whole family can enjoy. Batteries not included.

Wow! :o

LOLOL!! :D

Go right ahead and encourage him. ::)

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Guest junglesmacks

Conservative Barbie

This princess Barbie is specifically targeted for fags, such as Shaun, who are not only very conservative in their political views, but also love the cock like it's going out of style. This Barbie comes with its own penis, which can easily be placed in her mouth for pure sucking bliss. This is the gift a whole family can enjoy. Batteries not included.

Wow! :o

LOLOL!! :D

somehow i don't think that even "conservative" quite grasps the depths of head-up-the-ass-ness that said subject retains..

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Guest slamminshaun

somehow i don't think that even "conservative" quite grasps the depths of head-up-the-ass-ness that said subject retains..

fuot1s.jpg

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Riviera Beach Barbie

This recently parolled Barbie is available with 9mm handgun' date=' a bowie knife, a '78 El Camino with dark tinted windows and a meth lab kit. This model is only available after dark and can only be bought with cash, preferably small bills, unless ur a cop, then we don't know what ur talking about.

[/quote']

hahaha for real

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