gravity Posted March 16 Report Share Posted March 16 Here is a fairly extensive compilation of some of the extraordinary sexual activities that can be performed by men: 1. Hot Lunch - While receiving head from a woman, you proceed to shit on her chest. 2. The Stranger - Sitting on your hand until it falls asleep and then jerking off, eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone else. 3. Donkey Punch - Banging a girl doggy style and then moments before you cum, sticking your dick in her ass, and then punching her in the back of the head. This gives a tremendous sensation, but for it to work correctly, the girl must be knocked out so that her asshole tightens up. 4. Golden Shower - Any form of dropping piss all over a girl. 5. Pearl Necklace - Well known. Whenever you cum on the neck/cleavage area of a girl - it takes on the look of beautiful jewelry. 6. Coyote - This occurs when you wake up in the room of a nasty wombat and you know you've got to give her the slip. However, = you realize that your arm is wrapped around her. Therefore you must gnaw off your own arm to get out of the situation. Can be very painful. 7. Purple Mushroom - This occurs when a woman is giving you oral sex and you withdraw your penis in order to poke it back into her cheek. It should leave a lasting impression similar to a purple mushroom. 8. The Flying Camel - A personal favorite. As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her from your knees, you carefully balance yourself without using your arms to prop yourself up. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long, shrieking howl, much like a coyote. Strictly a class move. 9. Fishhook - A variation of the shocker in which you pull back towards the pussy after you stick your finger up her anus. 10. The Ram - Again, you're attacking from behind, when you start ramming her head against the wall in a rhythmic motion. the force of the wall should allow for deeper penetration. Very handy for those lulls in penile sensitivity. 11. Dog in a Bathtub - This is a proper name for when you attempt to insert your nuts into a girl's ass. It is so named because it can be just as hard as keeping a dog in the tub while giving it a bath. 12. Felching - A gay activity which I do not condone at all. It occurs when one fag fucks another fag in the ass and then sucks it out with a straw. Only included for those of you who are considering going to jail. 13. Tossing Salad - Another prison act where one person is forced to basically chow asshole with the help of whatever condiments are available, i.e. Jello, olive oil, etc. I'm never going to prison. 14. The Bronco - Back to reality with this classic. You start by going doggy style and then just when she is really enjoying it, you grab her tits as tight as possible and yell another girl's name. This gives you the feeling of riding a bronco as she tries to buck you off. 15. Pink glove - This frequently happens during sex when a girl is not wet enough. When you pull out to give her money, the inside of her twat sticks to your hog. Thus, the pink glove. 16. The Fountain of You - While sitting on her face and having her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman. Build up as much pressure as possible before releasing, spewing like a venerable geyser all over her face, neck and tits. (Better in her bed). 17. New York Style Taco - Anytime when you are so drunk that when you go down, you boot on your box. Happy trails. 18. The Durty Sanchez - A time honored event in which while laying the bone doggie style, you insert your finger into said woman's asshole, pull it out, wipe it across her upper lip leaving a thin, shit moustache. This makes her look like someone whose name would be Durty Sanchez. 19. The Fish Eye - From behind, you shove your finger in her ass (or his if you are in prison). Thereupon she turns around in a one-eyed winking motion to see what the hell you are doing. 20. Tuna Melt - You're down on a chick lapping away and discover that it just happens to be the time of the month. By no means do you stop though. When the whale spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face. 21. Furr Ball - You're chomping away at some mighty trollop who has a mane between her legs the size of Lionel Richie's afro, when a mammoth furr ball gets lodged in your throat and causes you to beat the piss out of her. 22. The Chili Dog - You take a shit on a girl's tits and then proceed to titty fuck her.------------------"The world is a better place because of those who refuse to believe they can't fly." I go places,I interact...(What places?)Certain, clubs. Like, Paradise. It's not bad.It's just that feeling when you can take your shirt off and really dance. When the music owns you. Do you understand? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bre5379 Posted March 16 Report Share Posted March 16 Gary, you are a sicko.Breann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathyo Posted March 17 Report Share Posted March 17 I definitely heard some new ones on that list! Thank you!!!!!!!! Biggest laugh of the day!------------------ ~*~*~Don't use time or words carelessly, neither can be retrieved.~*~*~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carabee Posted March 17 Report Share Posted March 17 thats some sick shit------------------She's got everything she needs/she's an artist/she done't look back/She'll take the dark out of the night time/and paint the daytime black.......DYLAN**THE MUSIC BEE** Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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