djmikedr Posted January 3 Report Share Posted January 3 copied from IM: (only removing names)Person AAA: sup how was nyePerson BBB: had the best new years everPerson AAA: nicePerson AAA: why is thatPerson BBB: It was also great closure with the drugsPerson AAA: what do u meanPerson AAA: ur done with drugsPerson BBB: yep, I'm donePerson BBB: its time has come and passedPerson BBB: oh and I helped out a few peeps as well that nightPerson BBB: also made a few’s nightPerson AAA: coolPerson AAA: how did u help themPerson BBB: various ways: direction, opening their minds, bringing up people when they needed it physically and mentallyPerson AAA: well then ur set for the new yr aren't yaPerson AAA: how many pills did u do??Person BBB: 3 :-(Person BBB: wasn’t gonna do any but gf wanted and it was gonna be last for both of us Person BBB: so i said okPerson BBB: actually I just wanted 1 but there was NO k in the housePerson BBB: which actually worked for the benefitPerson BBB: when there’s only e and no k EVERYONES talkative and friendlyPerson AAA: lolPerson AAA: yepPerson AAA: what kind of pills?Person BBB: happy face and stars, like it really matters hahahPerson BBB: what about you?Person AAA: lolPerson AAA: nah i don't take pills anymorePerson AAA: but i did sniff some kPerson AAA: which i don't do normally either but it was therePerson AAA: and i didn't want to drinkPerson AAA: i heard those smile faces are good huhPerson BBB: the e for the most part is mind controlledPerson AAA: what do u mean by thatPerson BBB: I dont get what i used to anymore because its all been done before in my mindPerson AAA: hmmmPerson AAA: yeahPerson AAA: i guess i'd have to agreePerson BBB: I adapt and master pretty most every thing and I learned how to master e and k and schrooms and weed ectPerson AAA: because that's y i don't drop anymorePerson BBB: how long has it been?Person BBB: oh and the things people say : now its like “oh your rollingâ€Person BBB: before it was wow this person really likes mePerson AAA: i dropped 1 at XXX about a month ago but b4 that i had not dropped in a yr and a halfPerson BBB: no shit and how long have you done itPerson AAA: i was dropping when i was 19 to 23Person AAA: i'm 25 nowPerson AAA: i was heavy into it 21 to 23Person BBB: hmmm 4 years, I've noticed 2 years is at the point where it becomes the normPerson BBB: with peoplePerson AAA: i always dropped a lot of bombsPerson AAA: they stopped working the same so i started sniffing mad k with itPerson BBB: at first it was "special occasion"Person AAA: and when that stopped working i stopped taking drugs all togetherPerson BBB: then a monthly thingPerson BBB: then a weeklyPerson AAA: same storyPerson BBB: and then fri and SaturdayPerson BBB: THEN,,, well you knowPerson AAA: at one point it was every other for mePerson AAA: lolPerson BBB: what about "alone?"Person AAA: yepPerson AAA: sure didPerson BBB: thats when i knew it was getting badPerson BBB: the WORST thing i ever did was CrystalPerson AAA: one time i took 6 by myself and sniffed 2 jarsPerson BBB: GOD that is a drug designed by Satin himselfPerson AAA: lolPerson AAA: super crackPerson BBB: but the question is: did it make you feel good?Person AAA: i never touched it myself Person AAA: the 6 pills and 2 jarsPerson AAA: not so much good but fucked upPerson BBB: ahh yesPerson BBB: the I wanna just get FUCKED UP partPerson AAA: i think when i was doing all those pills i was getting very depressedPerson BBB: yepPerson BBB: the more you do the more it takes out of youPerson BBB: then you feel worsePerson AAA: i think when i was doing all those drugs it was almost a suicide attempt do to the xtc abusePerson BBB: the whole "chasing"Person AAA: yepPerson BBB: ever take more to punish yourself?Person AAA: yeahPerson AAA: i've dropped 9 bombs b4Person AAA: sniffed cocPerson AAA: taken shroomsPerson AAA: drankPerson AAA: and sniffed kPerson AAA: all in one dayPerson AAA: i think it was punishmentPerson AAA: i thought i might diePerson AAA: for a timePerson AAA: but i'm done with that portion of my lifePerson AAA: i mean i still smoke weedPerson AAA: and take a bump now and thenPerson AAA: but i know what my limits r Person AAA: peeps ask me to go out every week endPerson BBB: oh god lets see: I did a few e's, k, crystal schrooms AND weed in 2 days in an ongoing thing to take my mind somewherePerson AAA: hell if i did i could get in for free do drugs for freePerson AAA: it's not worth it in the endPerson BBB: I was in a laughing suicidal statePerson AAA: lolPerson AAA: yepPerson BBB: hmmm kinda like the joker i guessPerson AAA: xtc is a fucked up drug to manPerson BBB: ALTHO-Person AAA: it's up there along side crystal crack and heroinPerson BBB: it taugh me so much, I've written hundreds of pagesPerson AAA: yeah i agreePerson AAA: it made me more sensitive i thinkPerson BBB: I've answered theories of life with that stuffPerson BBB: I shall share:Person AAA: opened my heart a little more then my pre e daysPerson BBB: MDR theory of Life #1: Every single person on this earth basically wants these 3 things: 1. to love, 2. to be loved, and 3, to exert control. It all comes down to that.Person AAA: hmmmPerson AAA: i don't know if i agreePerson AAA: some peeps could give a shit less about being loved or lovingPerson AAA: some peeps only give a shit about one thingPerson AAA: moneyPerson AAA: that's all they wantPerson AAA: that's all they needPerson AAA: and i'd say that's a good portion of today's societyPerson AAA: i mean people like urself and iPerson AAA: i'd say ur correctPerson BBB: deeper down inside it comes down to lovePerson AAA: hmmmPerson AAA: or hatePerson BBB: I've had lots o money but when you feel people dont like you , it takes over any monetary valuesPerson AAA: love easily turns to hate my manPerson BBB: only when there is lack of lovePerson BBB: example:Person BBB: in a club, as long as there are equal or more women, men never have a problem with each other because everyone has "something", when there is a shortage, men become aggresive and competitivePerson AAA: this truePerson AAA: so women equal us outPerson AAA: that's why they're there Person AAA: is what ur sayingPerson AAA: i don't know thoPerson AAA: i mean i was with jenn for almost 7 yrsPerson BBB: you were with Jenn? hmmmPerson BBB: oh thats right, thats how we talkinPerson AAA: yepPerson AAA: and i haven't been with a girl in a whilePerson AAA: but i don't think there's any lack of love with mePerson AAA: i mean i really don't want a girl at allPerson AAA: jenn was alot to handlePerson AAA: i was too i'm surePerson BBB: thast how you learn tho isnt it?Person AAA: but some people just hatePerson AAA: even with lovePerson AAA: my boy everyone loved himPerson BBB: hate isnt natural, its teh lack of love that causes those behavioursPerson AAA: i mean everyonePerson AAA: but he was filled with hate and self loathingPerson AAA: all he cared about was moneyPerson AAA: and it killed himPerson AAA: literallyPerson BBB: people usually like what they see visually and percieve mentallyPerson BBB: about a personPerson BBB: his desire for money may have been out of lack of lovePerson AAA: love is a chemical reaction in the brain Person BBB: I felt that way years agoPerson AAA: some people lack those chemicalsPerson BBB: I coun'nt attain love, so i attained money and was proud of myself in that fashionPerson BBB: everything is a chemical reaction in the brainPerson AAA: but this kid could obtain love Person AAA: anywherePerson AAA: any timePerson AAA: he had a a familyPerson AAA: friendsPerson AAA: loversPerson AAA: everythingPerson BBB: love is different for some peoplePerson AAA: but the luster of gold Person AAA: blinded himPerson AAA signed off at 9:30:50 PM. 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rdancer Posted January 3 Report Share Posted January 3 Im BUGGING OUT :eek: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
godfatherbam Posted January 3 Report Share Posted January 3 what the hell was that all about???? :confused: :confused: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djmikedr Posted January 3 Author Report Share Posted January 3 Originally posted by godfatherbam what the hell was that all about???? :confused: :confused: That was a just simple conversation about drugs that says alot. Like about how total strangers have gone through the same exact things.Towards the end of the messege, the content started going in another direction, but I didn't want to "edit" anything.I guess either people understand it because your "at" that point, or you dont because you havent reached "that" point yet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gambitrah Posted January 3 Report Share Posted January 3 Originally posted by apotheosis That was a just simple conversation about drugs that says alot. Like about how total strangers have gone through the same exact things.Towards the end of the messege, the content started going in another direction, but I didn't want to "edit" anything.I guess either people understand it because your "at" that point, or you dont because you havent reached "that" point yet. word to that..partied for almost 10 years and did more then my fair share of drugs and other things...im past that phase in my life now but i look back at it and have a lot of 'what if's.what if i went to college right after HS instead of slingin ills..would i be better off with that 'higher' education or in the long run am i better off with the 'street' education and the friends i have now...think of what i could have spent all that loot on instead of this or thatyoull make yourself go crazy with what if's and i should haves...fuck it..water under the bridge go forward... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rdancer Posted January 3 Report Share Posted January 3 Its just weird how drugs seems to work in parallel with people. My shit was the same way with that, and I have mastered the art of rolling just like the convo explains.I can control my rolls, when you can do that its just a bad thing. I think im going to relax a bit with all the shit I do , I want my seratonin back I dont feel accomplishments.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
princesslolita Posted January 4 Report Share Posted January 4 scary .... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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