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The following is an actual question given on a University

of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student

was so profound that the professor shared it with colleagues,

via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the

pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or

endothermic (absorbs heat?) :confused:

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's

Law, (gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is

compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in

time, so we need to know the rate that souls are moving into

Hell and the rate they are leaving. I think that we can safely

assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. No

souls, therefore, are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, lets look at the

different religions that exist in the world today. Some of

these religions state that if you are not a member of their

religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one

of these religions, and since people do not belong to more

than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the

number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell

because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature

and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has

to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at

which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure

in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of

souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop

until Hell freezes over.

So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by

"Teresa" during my freshman year, " ...that it will be a cold

day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the

fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations

with her, then, #2 cannot be true, and, thus, I am sure that

Hell is exothermic and will not freeze.

The student received the only "A" given :aright:

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