gothzane Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 Could you be with an attractive person of your prefrence as best freinds without bringing love or sexual desire into the relationship to completely fuck everything up...and if so...please explain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastyt Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 Yes... because I'm an adult and can exert self control... I've found that sexuality is usually there, somewhere in the beginning, but it's a hump that you can get over... and usually it's not that hard either.I don't see what the big deal is- people act like men and women can't be friends. Then people say they can't get close w/people of the same sex, b/c there's that whole competitive aspect to it. So tell me- who the fuck are you friends with, if that's the case??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gothzane Posted September 12 Author Report Share Posted September 12 Originally posted by tastyt So tell me- who the fuck are you friends with, if that's the case??? My cat? Seriously your right...its just a hump...just have to find where i put that "self-control" thing your talking about....i know i came with one...fuck if i remember where i put it...i think I threw it away...along with my sub-concious and my self-respect....oh well.I get along very well with everyone....just not people that I truely care about...go figure...guess i just need more therapy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimk29 Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 Originally posted by tastyt Yes... because I'm an adult and can exert self control... I've found that sexuality is usually there, somewhere in the beginning, but it's a hump that you can get over... and usually it's not that hard either.I don't see what the big deal is- people act like men and women can't be friends. Then people say they can't get close w/people of the same sex, b/c there's that whole competitive aspect to it. So tell me- who the fuck are you friends with, if that's the case??? I guess there would just be a bunch of lonely people running around. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastyt Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 Originally posted by jimk29 I guess there would just be a bunch of lonely people running around. But there are a lot of lonely people, and this is one of the reasons why. Maybe people just need to expand their horizons a little.Speaking of expanding horizons. We still haven't had that coffee yet, have we? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gothzane Posted September 12 Author Report Share Posted September 12 Originally posted by tastyt Maybe people just need to expand their horizons a little. Explain.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scaredgirl Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 I have more man friends than women and that dosent mean i sleep with all of them maybe with one or two hehehehehh no just joking i agree with tasty so i think yes i have so many gorgeous friends who are male and i love them but as i said i dont have sex with them Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastyt Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 Originally posted by gothzane Explain.... I mean they need to open their mind and realize that these barriers they've constructed are most likely detrimental to their happiness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimk29 Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 Originally posted by tastyt But there are a lot of lonely people, and this is one of the reasons why. Maybe people just need to expand their horizons a little.Speaking of expanding horizons. We still haven't had that coffee yet, have we? no we haven't... and I haven't bumped into you in a while. I had a great latte this afternoon from the french bakery on 23rd and 5th, then sat in the park and read my book, it was a lunch break well spent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phatman Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 i have quite a few lady friends that are extremely attractive (including miss tasty)...if i had a dollar for every time a typical male said, "you havent hit that?" or "you dont want to get with her?" blah blah blah...then when you explain that you're just not attracted to that person or you're just friends you get the standard, "either you're gay or there's something wrong with you"...classic ignorance...not all of us want to fuck every attractive woman we interact with...but even if you get the urge i will say this...we may have primal urges but what separates us from the rest of the animals is that we have control after thought...so control your urges and discover something beyond...my relationship with my roommate epitomizes an opposite sex plutonic relationship and i wouldnt give it up for the best sex possible...know why?...because after the sex, i would only have memories...with her, i have a friend for life and there is no greater value in my book right now...oh...by the way D...i love you... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastyt Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 Originally posted by jimk29 no we haven't... and I haven't bumped into you in a while. I had a great latte this afternoon from the french bakery on 23rd and 5th, then sat in the park and read my book, it was a lunch break well spent. I've been stuck inside all day. Blah! I've never had anything from that bakery, but every morning the croissants are awfully tempting... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gothzane Posted September 12 Author Report Share Posted September 12 Do you think having a wide variety of friends dilutes the pressure of intimate relationships?Originally posted by scaredgirl I have more man friends than women and that dosent mean i sleep with all of them maybe with one or two hehehehehh no just joking i agree with tasty so i think yes i have so many gorgeous friends who are male and i love them but as i said i dont have sex with them Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastyt Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 Originally posted by gothzane Do you think having a wide variety of friends dilutes the pressure of intimate relationships? Great question! It absolutely does! You can't depend upon your significant other for everything. It limits your own experiences, and it's not at all fair to your partner. I've been a person's "everything" before, and it is stress like you couldn't imagine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gothzane Posted September 12 Author Report Share Posted September 12 Very well said....you have my humble applause.Im not sure where im going with all of this...somethings buggen me and im knawing at it till it goes away...so far...youve all been a big help.Originally posted by phatman i have a friend for life and there is no greater value in my book right now...oh...by the way D...i love you... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimk29 Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 Originally posted by tastyt Great question! It absolutely does! You can't depend upon your significant other for everything. It limits your own experiences, and it's not at all fair to your partner. I've been a person's "everything" before, and it is stress like you couldn't imagine. Thats the problem that I am having right now. My girl isn't feeling 100% emotionally, she said that there are some things she wants to talk about but doesn't feel like she can talk to me about them. She talks to me about most everything and it seems to be more that she isn't sure what is bothering her than the fact that she can't talk to me. But its this overwhelming pressure to have to try and get her to open up, and she keeps telling me how she feels isolated. Its not fair to have this weight on my shoulders that I can't do anything about. I can't be everything, and these are the times that one needs other close friends to confide in, if for no other reason than the fact that they can give you further insight. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimk29 Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 Originally posted by tastyt I've been stuck inside all day. Blah! I've never had anything from that bakery, but every morning the croissants are awfully tempting... give in to your temptations one of these days, they make a great croissant, a very good baguette and a terrific latte... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gothzane Posted September 12 Author Report Share Posted September 12 Tell me about it :screams:Lets throw up a "for instance" here...Lets say youve been someones "everything" and youve givin them everything and more...to a fault of sacrifice. And youve fallen for that someone hard in all aspects....as a friend, lover, protector and whatnot. But now you introduce others into the picture to expand experiences. So the person youve been "everything" doesnt need you anymore and you feel like a teacher that lost a student....a mother that lost a son....you just feel lost...unapreciated. Where do we go from here?Originally posted by tastyt Great question! It absolutely does! You can't depend upon your significant other for everything. It limits your own experiences, and it's not at all fair to your partner. I've been a person's "everything" before, and it is stress like you couldn't imagine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gothzane Posted September 12 Author Report Share Posted September 12 Bingo exactly what i needed to hear...thanks a bazillion.Originally posted by jimk29 . I can't be everything, and these are the times that one needs other close friends to confide in, if for no other reason than the fact that they can give you further insight. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimk29 Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 Originally posted by gothzane Bingo exactly what i needed to hear...thanks a bazillion. no worries... I do what I can Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimk29 Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 So Tasty,whats up with our coffee? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wideskies Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 Originally posted by tastyt I've been stuck inside all day. Blah! I've never had anything from that bakery, but every morning the croissants are awfully tempting... yum! i LOVE warm chocolate croissants. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastyt Posted September 12 Report Share Posted September 12 Originally posted by jimk29 So Tasty,whats up with our coffee? When it slows down a little and I start getting out at a normal hour we'll have to grab some. Which will hopefully be by the middle of next week. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimk29 Posted September 13 Report Share Posted September 13 Originally posted by tastyt When it slows down a little and I start getting out at a normal hour we'll have to grab some. Which will hopefully be by the middle of next week. Sounds like a plan... Why you so busy? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastyt Posted September 13 Report Share Posted September 13 Originally posted by jimk29 Sounds like a plan... Why you so busy? Well, the biggest part of my job is coordinating our participation in trade shows... and they run from last weekend thru the middle of October... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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