trancedkitten Posted December 19 Report Share Posted December 19 Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeezethese dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out"?How about the first guy to try a chicken egg? Do you consider him brave?How many tries before he cooked it?Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horriblecrisp which no decent human being would eat?If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut,whycan't he fix a hole in a boat?Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don'tpoint to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they aregoing to look up there anyway?Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They'reBothdogs!What do you call male ballerinas?Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?Why ARE Trix only for kids?If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, whydidn'the just buy dinner?Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'?If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? (Come on say it!)If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made fromvegetables,then what is baby oil made from?If a man is talking in the forest, and no woman is there to hear him, ishestill wrong?Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billionstarsin the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wetpaintsomewhere,you have to touch it to make sure?If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad atyou,but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?If it's a 50 mph wind, and you drive your car 50 mph downwind, if youstickyour head out the window, do you feel the wind?Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the sametune?Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?(I'll bet you sang those two songs above just to see if the tune was thesame!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fineones Posted December 21 Report Share Posted December 21 The only reason i read the whole thing was so i didnt repeat one of yours ...but by the time i got to the bottom i fucking forgot...ERRRrFINEROCKS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
georgym Posted December 21 Report Share Posted December 21 If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?YES YES !! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
liqidtouch Posted December 24 Report Share Posted December 24 Originally posted by trancedkitten Who was the first person to ........ to see if the tune was thesame!) OMG i cant stop laughingthats too funnyand sorry to say but the that says (If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?)is actually a slaves songit was created be a slave -Jimmy is the slave masterand the whips back then were made of corn husks-this was a song for the slave movement against their masters-get it"my masters gone away" means since he couldnt controll them anymore-he was extrodited as a terrable master.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dgmodel Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 Originally posted by trancedkitten Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeezethese dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out"?How about the first guy to try a chicken egg? Do you consider him brave?How many tries before he cooked it?Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horriblecrisp which no decent human being would eat?If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut,whycan't he fix a hole in a boat?Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don'tpoint to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they aregoing to look up there anyway?Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They'reBothdogs!What do you call male ballerinas?Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?Why ARE Trix only for kids?If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, whydidn'the just buy dinner?Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'?If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? (Come on say it!)If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made fromvegetables,then what is baby oil made from?If a man is talking in the forest, and no woman is there to hear him, ishestill wrong?Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billionstarsin the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wetpaintsomewhere,you have to touch it to make sure?If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad atyou,but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?If it's a 50 mph wind, and you drive your car 50 mph downwind, if youstickyour head out the window, do you feel the wind?Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the sametune?Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?(I'll bet you sang those two songs above just to see if the tune was thesame!) lmao!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dgmodel Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 Originally posted by liqidtouch OMG i cant stop laughingthats too funnyand sorry to say but the that says (If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?)is actually a slaves songit was created be a slave -Jimmy is the slave masterand the whips back then were made of corn husks-this was a song for the slave movement against their masters-get it"my masters gone away" means since he couldnt controll them anymore-he was extrodited as a terrable master.... you are correct... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dgmodel Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 Originally posted by fineones The only reason i read the whole thing was so i didnt repeat one of yours ...but by the time i got to the bottom i fucking forgot...ERRRrFINEROCKS ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dgmodel Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 this is one i thought of the other day...if ppl say some womens vaginas smell like fish, do fishes vaginas smell like humans?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
liqidtouch Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 ok ok this is one i forgot to put in:We all know that we DRIVE on the PARKwayand PARK in a DRIVEwaybut why do we walkFORWARD on a SIDEwalk? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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