fierydesire Posted July 21 Report Share Posted July 21 Do you think this is the best remedy to get over an ex or the like?Or is it ok if you see them after things end on an occasional basis, say once a week, once a month at places you used to frequent . . . Personally out of sight out of mind is better for me, I'm realizing, just seeng that person may not be good for my mental state But at the same time . . . are you really supposed to drop everything and everyone b/c you guys are no longer together k so I guess I don't know which one is better Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chula22 Posted July 21 Report Share Posted July 21 Well Honestly that approach works for me for many things.INCLUDING an ex. I dont know to say that that is the best way for everyone to deal but it is for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phatman Posted July 21 Report Share Posted July 21 ...i like to make a voodoo doll of my ex's and staple it to the wall so i can do various things to it...spit, punch, burn, etc... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
naughtybabe Posted July 21 Report Share Posted July 21 Out of sight out of mind has its good and bad...Just when you seem to be doing fine and you think you are over them you bump into them and you totally get fucked up... This always happens to me... I think Im moving on and getting over the ex and then I see them somewhere and all the feelings I thought where no longer then surface back and I become a mess because they are feelings I dont want to feel anymore.. Sometimes I wish I was immune to having any feelings..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phatman Posted July 21 Report Share Posted July 21 Originally posted by naughtybabe .. Sometimes I wish I was immune to having any feelings..... ...leave that to us men... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fierydesire Posted July 21 Author Report Share Posted July 21 phattie: wackjob haha Wendy: Ugh I agree . . . sometimes I wish feelings would disappear at that point . . but without them would be worse. Also those feelings that rush back jusr fucken suck, like I thought I was over, obviously I was mistaken. . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
naughtybabe Posted July 21 Report Share Posted July 21 Phattie : Im gonna cut you!! lolZehra : Dont confuse what you feel now for what you once felt..All those feelings that you are feeling are nothing but memoriesof the good times you had.. Someone once told me how whenwe are in relationships we always seem to just wanna remember the good times and that this is why break up's become so hard..Think about it this way.. Whether it was your choice or his to end the relationship... The relationship was suffering, if you guys were meant to be you still be with him.. He was yet another stepping stone for you to get to the one.. I know how you feel but all I can say to you is to keep yourself busy.. You know Im here for you at the drop of a dime.... We can go running or out for drinks!! or better yet make fun of Cack's that should not be cacks :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phatman Posted July 21 Report Share Posted July 21 Originally posted by naughtybabe Phattie : Im gonna cut you!! lol ..for what?...joking?...i'll spank you......we all tend to romanticize our feelings when time and distance are established after an event, experience, relationship, etc...we also sometimes do that during an experience/relationship - i.e. the conquest post...you have to concentrate long and hard on what IS as opposed to what it APPEARS to be...not an easy task... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fierydesire Posted July 21 Author Report Share Posted July 21 Originally posted by naughtybabe Phattie : Im gonna cut you!! lolZehra : Dont confuse what you feel now for what you once felt..All those feelings that you are feeling are nothing but memoriesof the good times you had.. Someone once told me how whenwe are in relationships we always seem to just wanna remember the good times and that this is why break up's become so hard..Think about it this way.. Whether it was your choice or his to end the relationship... The relationship was suffering, if you guys were meant to be you still be with him.. He was yet another stepping stone for you to get to the one.. I know how you feel but all I can say to you is to keep yourself busy.. You know Im here for you at the drop of a dime.... We can go running or out for drinks!! or better yet make fun of Cack's that should not be cacks :laugh: thanx babes your the best I def know what your saying and if only this was said to me a year ago . . . but now the feelings I had for him are bundled up in a memory, with no regrets but obviously I know if we were made for each other we would still be together . . . In a way I'm glad that things ended b/c it helped me grow and see things in a different light that I may not have seen if I stayed with him . . . so I guess there is always the good and bad of anything that ends . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dgmodel Posted July 22 Report Share Posted July 22 Originally posted by fierydesire Do you think this is the best remedy to get over an ex or the like? what if it has the converse effect??? like absence makes the heart grow fonder... sometimes it is the best cure other times it isnt... typically when that approach is taken youre away from the person, and only have good thoughts of them then after a while you "Brainwash" yourself into thinking this person is amazing.. you tend to push out the bad memories and only focus on the goodones and you create this superhuman... who never was... its hard to explain id need to talk to you in person to really explain but you can get the idea of what im saying... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
naughtybabe Posted July 22 Report Share Posted July 22 Originally posted by dgmodel what if it has the converse effect??? like absence makes the heart grow fonder... sometimes it is the best cure other times it isnt... typically when that approach is taken youre away from the person, and only have good thoughts of them then after a while you "Brainwash" yourself into thinking this person is amazing.. you tend to push out the bad memories and only focus on the goodones and you create this superhuman... who never was... its hard to explain id need to talk to you in person to really explain but you can get the idea of what im saying... This is the person who told me about how we sometimes only keeping the good memories... He so smart!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marcid21 Posted July 22 Report Share Posted July 22 wait....hold the phone.....I agree with what Marko said about the reverse effects....but.....I don't understand why distance has to be in extreme's...If you have *friends* that are in somewhat of the same circle as the other....aren't there steps u can take to avoid this other person?I dunno, maybe that's my naieve way of thinking....but, it's a pretty big sacrifice to give up others as well....no? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fierydesire Posted July 22 Author Report Share Posted July 22 Marko: I see what your saying and it is true to some extent . . . but I do remember all the negative things, however the positive def lingers more . . . but alas with time things do fade and stay treasured within my heart and soulMarci: why would I intentionally take steps to avoid the person? that just seems dumb to me wouldn't it just be better not to even go out to the same places and yea its a sacrifice to give up others . . . so what are you saying now I'm lost Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastyt Posted July 22 Report Share Posted July 22 Originally posted by fierydesire Marci: why would I intentionally take steps to avoid the person? that just seems dumb to me wouldn't it just be better not to even go out to the same places and yea its a sacrifice to give up others . . . so what are you saying now I'm lost But- not going to certain places IS intentionally taking steps to avoid the person.Anyway, the whole "absence makes the heart grow fonder" theory proposed by Marko- it's the exact opposite for me!!! But then again, I normally stay in relationships way past their expiration date, so by the time I exit I'm already sick of the situation. So when I'm out... if I think about things at all... it's usually nothing very good that comes to mind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetie029 Posted July 22 Report Share Posted July 22 Originally posted by fierydesire Do you think this is the best remedy to get over an ex or the like?Or is it ok if you see them after things end on an occasional basis, say once a week, once a month at places you used to frequent . . . Personally out of sight out of mind is better for me, I'm realizing, just seeng that person may not be good for my mental state But at the same time . . . are you really supposed to drop everything and everyone b/c you guys are no longer together k so I guess I don't know which one is better Out of sight out of mind is the best policy.......But it's tough when the other person shares the same circle of friends as you or frequents the same places ect....WHo's to say YOU should have to compromise a part of your social life b/c that's not necessary...but at the same time seeing the person as little as possible will make it much easier to deal w/ when seeing them in the future...Believe me I know Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sexxichikk Posted July 22 Report Share Posted July 22 out of sight out of mind, is def. the way to go. Sometimes its just hard, esp if you do have the same group of friends! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
guest00901 Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 Leave em alone....walk away...and never look backbest way:aright:But the best way to get over one guy with with another Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.