Evan Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 Originally posted by wideskies so you're saying that CLASS comes from spending lots of money on yourself?okay, it's clear that you have no real desire to check out the "real world" and the real women out there.have fun being stuck in a rut! NO. Nothing to do with money. But about presenting yourself to show the guy that you took time and effort to look good for him. it goes the other way too. I know if I showed up on a date wearing something I just threw on, the girl would think that she wasn't worth the effort.Evan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wideskies Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 Originally posted by Evan NO. Nothing to do with money. But about presenting yourself to show the guy that you took time and effort to look good for him. it goes the other way too. I know if I showed up on a date wearing something I just threw on, the girl would think that she wasn't worth the effort.Evan as rackham pointed out, you don't need to spend lots of money to take care of yourself.if you only care about the cost of everything (ie, a $100 haircut that looks the same as a $20 haircut is better simply because it's $100...)it sounds like you wouldn't want to date a woman who hadn't spent lots of money doing something that would take less. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evan Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 Originally posted by wideskies as rackham pointed out, you don't need to spend lots of money to take care of yourself.if you only care about the cost of everything (ie, a $100 haircut that looks the same as a $20 haircut is better simply because it's $100...)it sounds like you wouldn't want to date a woman who hadn't spent lots of money doing something that would take less. Not at all. You don't need to get a haircut for every date. But I kow girls who have colored their hair, gotten highlights, got blown out, etc.. before a date with a guy they really liked.I have dated women who have shown up in dresses on dates. i had a date last week where the girl showed up with jeans and a low cut t shirt. But I got farther with the girl who wore the dress cause I KNEW that she wanted to be with me because of all her effort. Girl's don't usually come out and say directly to a guy "I want you". You need to read their hints. if she leans in towards you, asks you about yourself, has hand contact, etc. The getting ready for a date thing is just a good start.Are you telling me that you NEVER spent extra time than normal getting ready for a date with somone you really liked? Myabe bought new clothes for the date? New shoes? New underwear?Evan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rackham Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 Originally posted by Evan It's called CLASS. Some girls have it. Obviously, other girls don't. There are girls that will ponder for hours what to wear, and others who don't give a fuck (like u) and wear whatever comes out of your closet. The last girl i dated looked like a princess, dressed like a princess, as well as made her own money so she didn't need me to provide her with this.Evam I think you need to reconsider what sort of "class" you're looking for. Just because a girl gets $100 haircuts doesn't make her classy... it just makes her willing to spend $100 on a haircut.I'd rather that a girl dress cleanly, not overdone, and wow me with her PERSONALITY, rather than the amount of money she spends on herself... She doesn't have to spend hundreds of dollars to show me she's interested in me... just being friendly is a good start! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastyt Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 *breaks vow to exit thread*I'd just like to point out that some people involved in this thread are very happily involved. Others, are not. Perhaps there's a reason for this. Maybe some people might want to reconsider that which they consider important in a partner/relationship.Just some food for thought. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evan Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 I don't ask a girl how much she spent on herself before the date. Nor do they tell me. But if I notice the girl's hair is different, or she has a new dress, or just looks unbeleiveable, I KNOW she got prepared for me instead of "just throwing something on"Evan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evan Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 Originally posted by tastyt *breaks vow to exit thread*I'd just like to point out that some people involved in this debate are very happily involved. Others, are not. Perhaps there's a reason for this. Maybe some people might want to reconsider that which they consider important in a partner/relationship.Just some food for thought. Hey.. It's not my fault. I'm looking. Got a date with a new prospect on Friday night. That is till SexxybabyD asks me out. Evan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rackham Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 Originally posted by Evan I don't ask a girl how much she spent on herself before the date. Nor do they tell me. But if I notice the girl's hair is different, or she has a new dress, or just looks unbeleiveable, I KNOW she got prepared for me instead of "just throwing something on"Evan Is it not possible for a woman to look good for a date without getting all done up in expensive clothing and makeup?I for one want to be with somebody who I think is beautiful whether or not she's wearing makeup!Again, maybe your difficulties have something to do with the criteria by which you're judging women... give the dressed down ones a chance -- I GUARANTEE you that you'll find many of them to be quite genuine and worth knowing! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wideskies Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 Originally posted by rackham I think you need to reconsider what sort of "class" you're looking for. Just because a girl gets $100 haircuts doesn't make her classy... it just makes her willing to spend $100 on a haircut.I'd rather that a girl dress cleanly, not overdone, and wow me with her PERSONALITY, rather than the amount of money she spends on herself... She doesn't have to spend hundreds of dollars to show me she's interested in me... just being friendly is a good start! i guess Evan isn't looking for personality, after all. he's more interested in the outside of the package. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evan Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 Originally posted by wideskies i guess Evan isn't looking for personality, after all. he's more interested in the outside of the package. <sigh? What are you guys NOT understanding. I have dated all types of girls. I'm not that shallow. BUT AGAIN. Girls do NOT usually come out and say how they feel about a guy directly. You need to read signals. Getting prepared and made up for a date is one of the goddamned signals. The girl could be chubby and plain looking. But IF she got made up, I know that she is attracted to me. This is a NORMAL thing. Maybe the girls u have dated weren't interested so never got made uo for you. Maybe you only dated broke college girls who couldn't afford to take care of themselves. All the business women I dated would nopt leave the house without preparing for a significant while for a date with me. It's NOT about the physicall. But about the motion.Evan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wideskies Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 let me elaborate...Evan, women who define themselves through extensive rituals of image preparation might value those same material attributes (ie what types of clothes and car you have, how much money you have in general, etc) in a partner.so if you seek out those image-driven types, don't be surprised by the negative aspects of their personalities.i also wouldn't want to date someone who doesn't make an effort to be healthy, clean, and appear interested in me-- but that doesn't require expense and obsession. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastey Posted July 23 Author Report Share Posted July 23 Originally posted by tastyt *breaks vow to exit thread*I'd just like to point out that some people involved in this thread are very happily involved. Others, are not. Perhaps there's a reason for this. Maybe some people might want to reconsider that which they consider important in a partner/relationship.Just some food for thought. yes, and some people have different standards than others.about the clothing. if i walk around with a girl i want to PROUD of her. i look and dress good too, always. i get a HIGH around hot women that made themselves hot for *me*. expensive clothes aren´t really important though. i´ve been with women (for a short time) that had very expensive clothes but no real sense of style. you don´t need to have expensive clothes, but ON THE GIRL, it should ooze style and sexyness. thats whats important. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rackham Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 Originally posted by Evan <sigh? What are you guys NOT understanding. I have dated a;; types of girls. I'm not that shallow. BUT AGAIN. Girls do NOT usually come out and say how they feel about a guy directly. You need to read signals. Getting prepared and made up for a date is one of the goddamned signals. The girl could be chubby and plain looking. But IF she got made up, I know that she is attracted to me. This is a NORMAL thing. Maybe the girls u have dated weren't interested so never got made uo for you. Maybe you only dated broke college girls who couldn't afford to take care of themselves. All the business women I dated would nopt leave the house without preparing for a significant while for a date with me. It's NOT about the physicall. But about the motion.Evan. I think your definition of "taking care of herself" differs significantly from mine. To me, "taking care of herself" has more to do with whether she takes care of her mind and body.If a girl wants to spend time with me one-on-one, I assume she finds me at least remotely interesting. I judge the rest on appearance and personality. By appearance, I mean, do I find her attractive? She doesn't have to be made up for me to find her attractive. In fact, it's much better if she's NOT covered in makeup, so I can see what she looks like naturally! By personality, I mean, are we intellectually and emotionally compatible? I'll never get to know that if I reject her outright based on how "done up" she is.Like tastyt said, you might want to consider that some of us are in very stable and fulfilling relationships... we didn't get there by misjudging people... we got there by making the *right* judgement calls! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evan Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 For example, I mentioned the girl last week who didn't get made up for our date. By the end of the date, I felt that she was just trying to get a free dinner. In fact, I am pretty sure of that. Why put any expense in hersalf when all she has to do is put on jeans and go get a free dinner in a nice restuaraunt. Get my drift.Evan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rackham Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 Originally posted by Evan For example, I mentioned the girl last week who didn't get made up for our date. By the end of the date, I felt that she was just trying to get a free dinner. In fact, I am pretty sure of that. Why put any expense in hersalf when all she has to do is put on jeans and go get a free dinner in a nice restuaraunt. Get my drift.Evan How about this... don't do YOURSELF up so much... don't give out an aura of having lots of money... then maybe you'll find a girl who's interested in YOU, and not just your ability to buy her dinner! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wideskies Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 Originally posted by Evan For example, I mentioned the girl last week who didn't get made up for our date. By the end of the date, I felt that she was just trying to get a free dinner. In fact, I am pretty sure of that. Why put any expense in hersalf when all she has to do is put on jeans and go get a free dinner in a nice restuaraunt. Get my drift.Evan did you even read my last reply? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evan Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 It's not about me looking for a girl that wants my money. i have dated girls that thought I was close to broke. BUT, I knew that they wanted me by the way they got ready. As for a girl using me dfor dinner, that happenes all the time to everyone. The girls are never gonna admit it to a guys face. But I know dozens of girls who have gone out with a guy not because they were interested, but because they had nothing better to do and got a nice meal out of it. I see how my friends dress for one of these "chumps" and how they dress for a guy they like. As for the comment about likeing their girl to look good. I also feel that way. I know the opposite is true too. When a girl introduces me to her friends, I know she wants me to look good and make a good impression.Get out of the mentality that making yourself look good is degrading in ANY way. Looking good for somone compliments you and tells you that you are WORTH the effort.Evan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wideskies Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 ...you've completely missed the points we've been making.oh well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rackham Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 I've never been used for dinner. Not once. Never. I never put myself in a situation where I can be used like that.I don't want to be with a woman who dresses like a bum, but I also don't want to be with a woman who won't present me to her friends if I'm wearing slacks and a t-shirt. I'm getting the impression that what you consider "looking good" is completely unrealistic and has everything to do with money!For someone who's obviously having trouble with women, you sound unduly sure of yourself and critical of the suggestions that are being made. You might want to consider that before you tell us that we have the wrong mentality... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastyt Posted July 23 Report Share Posted July 23 Originally posted by tastey yes, and some people have different standards than others.about the clothing. if i walk around with a girl i want to PROUD of her. i look and dress good too, always. i get a HIGH around hot women that made themselves hot for *me*. expensive clothes aren´t really important though. i´ve been with women (for a short time) that had very expensive clothes but no real sense of style. you don´t need to have expensive clothes, but ON THE GIRL, it should ooze style and sexyness. thats whats important. I understand that people have different standards, and I for one am an extremely picky bitch who refused to stoop below mine! But the whole point is that if you expect someone to *look* high maintenance, you best expect her to *act* the part as well. And not bitch about it when that turns out to be the case! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.