John Kerry Resume

[obby]

NAME: John Kerry

RESIDENCE: 7 mansions, including Washington, DC, worth multimillions.

EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE:

Law Enforcement. I voted to cut every law enforcement, CIA

and defense bill in my career as a US Senator. I ordered Boston to

remove a fire hydrant which I considered unsightly, in front of my mansion,

thereby endangering my neighbors in the event of fire.

MILITARY:

I used three minor injuries to get an early discharge from

the military and service in Vietnam (as documented by the attending

doctor). I then returned to the US, joined Jane Fonda in protesting

the war, and insulted returning Vietnam vets, claiming they committed

atrocities and were baby killers. I threw my medals, ribbons, or

something away in protest. Or did I? My book; Vietnam Veterans

Against the War: The New Soldier shows how I truly feel about the

military. I deplore the military!

COLLEGE:

I graduated from Yale University with a low C average.

Unlike my counterpart George Bush, I have no higher education and did not

get admitted to Harvard nor graduate with an M.B.A

PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:

I ran for U.S. Congress and have been there ever since. I

have no real world experience except that of a gigolo, by marrying rich

women and running HJ Heinz vicariously through my wife Teresa.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS:

As a US Senator I set the record for the most liberal voting

record, exceeding even Ted Kennedy and Hillary Clinton. I have

consistently failed to support our military and CIA by voting

against budgets, thus gutting our country's ability to defend itself.

Although I voted for the Iraq War, now I am against it and refuse to admit

that I voted for it. I voted for every liberal piece of legislation. I

have no plan to help this country but I intend to raise taxes

significantly if I am elected.

My wealth so far exceeds that of my counterpart, George

Bush, that he will never catch up. I make no or little charitable

contributions and have never agreed to pay any voluntary excess taxes in MA, despite family wealth in excess of $700 million.

I (we) own 28 manufacturing plants (Heinz) outside of the

U.S. in places like Asia, Mexico and Europe. We can make more profit from

the cheaper cost of labor in those Countries, although blame George

Bush for sending all of the jobs out of Country.

Although I claim to be in favor of alternative energy

sources, Ted Kennedy and I oppose windmills off Nantucket and Martha's Vineyard as it might spoil our view of the ocean as we cruise on our yachts.

RECORDS AND REFERENCES:

None.

PERSONAL

I ride a Serotta Bike.

My Gulfstream V Jet I call The Flying Squirrel.

I call my $850,000 42-foot Hinckley twin diesel yacht the

"Scarmouche."

I am fascinated by rap and hip-hop and feel it reflects our

real culture.

I own several "Large" SUVs including one parked at my

Nantucket summer mansion, though I am against large polluting inefficient

vehicles and blame George Bush for the energy problems.

PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING IN 2004.

[fresinha12]

doesnt kerry have a JD??? thats way more than an MBA....second what GPA did he have?? I would like to know.

NAME: John Kerry

RESIDENCE: 7 mansions, including Washington, DC, worth multimillions.

EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE:

Law Enforcement. I voted to cut every law enforcement, CIA

and defense bill in my career as a US Senator. I ordered Boston to

remove a fire hydrant which I considered unsightly, in front of my mansion,

thereby endangering my neighbors in the event of fire.

MILITARY:

I used three minor injuries to get an early discharge from

the military and service in Vietnam (as documented by the attending

doctor). I then returned to the US, joined Jane Fonda in protesting

the war, and insulted returning Vietnam vets, claiming they committed

atrocities and were baby killers. I threw my medals, ribbons, or

something away in protest. Or did I? My book; Vietnam Veterans

Against the War: The New Soldier shows how I truly feel about the

military. I deplore the military!

COLLEGE:

I graduated from Yale University with a low C average.

Unlike my counterpart George Bush, I have no higher education and did not

get admitted to Harvard nor graduate with an M.B.A

PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:

I ran for U.S. Congress and have been there ever since. I

have no real world experience except that of a gigolo, by marrying rich

women and running HJ Heinz vicariously through my wife Teresa.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS:

As a US Senator I set the record for the most liberal voting

record, exceeding even Ted Kennedy and Hillary Clinton. I have

consistently failed to support our military and CIA by voting

against budgets, thus gutting our country's ability to defend itself.

Although I voted for the Iraq War, now I am against it and refuse to admit

that I voted for it. I voted for every liberal piece of legislation. I

have no plan to help this country but I intend to raise taxes

significantly if I am elected.

My wealth so far exceeds that of my counterpart, George

Bush, that he will never catch up. I make no or little charitable

contributions and have never agreed to pay any voluntary excess taxes in MA, despite family wealth in excess of $700 million.

I (we) own 28 manufacturing plants (Heinz) outside of the

U.S. in places like Asia, Mexico and Europe. We can make more profit from

the cheaper cost of labor in those Countries, although blame George

Bush for sending all of the jobs out of Country.

Although I claim to be in favor of alternative energy

sources, Ted Kennedy and I oppose windmills off Nantucket and Martha's Vineyard as it might spoil our view of the ocean as we cruise on our yachts.

RECORDS AND REFERENCES:

None.

PERSONAL

I ride a Serotta Bike.

My Gulfstream V Jet I call The Flying Squirrel.

I call my $850,000 42-foot Hinckley twin diesel yacht the

"Scarmouche."

I am fascinated by rap and hip-hop and feel it reflects our

real culture.

I own several "Large" SUVs including one parked at my

Nantucket summer mansion, though I am against large polluting inefficient

vehicles and blame George Bush for the energy problems.

PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING IN 2004.

[sobeton]

Senator John Forbes Kerry (MA)

Current Office: U.S. Senator

Current District: Junior Seat

Office Seeking: President

First Elected: 11/06/1984

Last Elected: 11/05/2002

Next Election: 2008

Party: Democrat

Committees:

Commerce, Science & Transportation [senate]

Finance [senate]

Foreign Relations [senate]

Small Business and Entrepreneurship [senate], Ranking Member

Background Information

Gender: Male

Family: Wife: Teresa Heinz

2 Daughters: Alexandra, Vanessa

3 Stepsons: John, Andre, Christopher.

Birthdate: 12/11/1943

Birthplace: Denver, CO

Home City: Boston, MA

Religion: Roman Catholic

Education:

JD, Boston College Law School, 1976

BA, Political Science, Yale University, 1966.

Professional Experience:

First Assistant District Attorney, Middlesex County, MA, 1977-1982

Attorney, Admitted Massachusetts Bar, 1976

Lieutenant, United States Navy, 1966-1970

Received Silver Star, Bronze Star, 3 Purple Hearts, 2 Presidential Unit Citations and a National Defense Medal.

Political Experience:

Senator, United States Senate, 1984-present

Lieutenant Governor, Massachusetts, 1983-1985

Democratic Nominee, United States House of Representatives, 1972.

Organizations:

Leader, Vietnam Veterans Against the War

Co-Founder, Vietnam Veterans of America.

Caucuses/Non-Legislative Committees:

Co-Chair, Congressional Vietnam-Era Veterans Caucus

Chair, Democratic Steering Committee

Chair, Hispanic Task Force

Senate New Democrat Coalition

[chris817]

Where did you get this Rush Limbaugh's site?

NAME: John Kerry

RESIDENCE: 7 mansions, including Washington, DC, worth multimillions.

EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE:

Law Enforcement. I voted to cut every law enforcement, CIA

and defense bill in my career as a US Senator. I ordered Boston to

remove a fire hydrant which I considered unsightly, in front of my mansion,

thereby endangering my neighbors in the event of fire.

MILITARY:

I used three minor injuries to get an early discharge from

the military and service in Vietnam (as documented by the attending

doctor). I then returned to the US, joined Jane Fonda in protesting

the war, and insulted returning Vietnam vets, claiming they committed

atrocities and were baby killers. I threw my medals, ribbons, or

something away in protest. Or did I? My book; Vietnam Veterans

Against the War: The New Soldier shows how I truly feel about the

military. I deplore the military!

COLLEGE:

I graduated from Yale University with a low C average.

Unlike my counterpart George Bush, I have no higher education and did not

get admitted to Harvard nor graduate with an M.B.A

PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:

I ran for U.S. Congress and have been there ever since. I

have no real world experience except that of a gigolo, by marrying rich

women and running HJ Heinz vicariously through my wife Teresa.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS:

As a US Senator I set the record for the most liberal voting

record, exceeding even Ted Kennedy and Hillary Clinton. I have

consistently failed to support our military and CIA by voting

against budgets, thus gutting our country's ability to defend itself.

Although I voted for the Iraq War, now I am against it and refuse to admit

that I voted for it. I voted for every liberal piece of legislation. I

have no plan to help this country but I intend to raise taxes

significantly if I am elected.

My wealth so far exceeds that of my counterpart, George

Bush, that he will never catch up. I make no or little charitable

contributions and have never agreed to pay any voluntary excess taxes in MA, despite family wealth in excess of $700 million.

I (we) own 28 manufacturing plants (Heinz) outside of the

U.S. in places like Asia, Mexico and Europe. We can make more profit from

the cheaper cost of labor in those Countries, although blame George

Bush for sending all of the jobs out of Country.

Although I claim to be in favor of alternative energy

sources, Ted Kennedy and I oppose windmills off Nantucket and Martha's Vineyard as it might spoil our view of the ocean as we cruise on our yachts.

RECORDS AND REFERENCES:

None.

PERSONAL

I ride a Serotta Bike.

My Gulfstream V Jet I call The Flying Squirrel.

I call my $850,000 42-foot Hinckley twin diesel yacht the

"Scarmouche."

I am fascinated by rap and hip-hop and feel it reflects our

real culture.

I own several "Large" SUVs including one parked at my

Nantucket summer mansion, though I am against large polluting inefficient

vehicles and blame George Bush for the energy problems.

PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING IN 2004.