Jump to content
Clubplanet Nightlife Community

UN FOCUSES ON TURMOIL IN AMERIJKANISTAN


Recommended Posts

After two decades in which social and financial inequalities widened amidst

unsustainable speculative development, the country of Amerijkanistan held presidential elections this week.

The two leading candidates were both drawn from a tiny elite, both spent vast sums on propaganda, and both have claimed victory. Experts on Amerijkanistan recall the history of violent revolution, civil war and more

recent political violence and assassinations, resignations, impeachments,

sexual scandals and corruption in this emergent republic, and recommend that the UN supervise its elections until the country stabilizes.

"It is struggling to emerge from years of political polarization and turmoil" said a World Trade Organization spokesperson, "and its long-suffering people deserve our support."

"One side of the country declared results before voting had finished in another part" he explained. Moreover, he went on to spell out that the southern province of 'Floridalandia,' in which the leadership struggle is being fought, is run by the brother of one of the candidates, whose

father had previously ruled the entire country, having risen through his control of

the nation's intelligence/security apparatus. Their family is based in a part of the country in which secessionist feelings have long run strong and which was only incorporated into Amerijkanistan after a border war.

Experts on Amerijkanistan argue that the UN should go in to run education programs, disarm the population, relieve the malnutrition and environmental problems caused by adherence to a staple diet of cheese and burgers, democratize the police forces and above all halt the further

development of war machinery. "This country has used dangerous weapons in the past

and often threatened to do so again. But with our help, modernization, and a stress on human development, it may have a more stable future and join the ranks of the civilized international community" he said.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
×
×
  • Create New...