Corporate Lessons

[b-side]

Corporate Lesson #1

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her

shower when the doorbell rings. After a few seconds of arguing over which

one should go and answer the doorbell, the wife gives up, quickly wraps

herself up in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there

stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she could say a word, Bob says,

"I'll give you $800 to drop that towel that you have on."

After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in

front of Bob.

After a few seconds, Bob hands her 800 dollars and leaves. Confused, but

excited about her good fortune, the woman wraps back up in the towel and

goes back upstairs. When she gets back to the bathroom, her husband asks

from the shower, "Who was that?"

"It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies.

"Great!" the husband says, "Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?"

Moral of the story:

If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your

shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable

exposure.

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Corporate Lesson #2

A priest was driving along and saw a nun on the side of the road. He

stopped and offered her a lift which she accepted. She got in and crossed

her legs, forcing her habit to open and reveal a lovely leg. The priest had

a look and nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily

slid his hand up her leg. The nun looked at him and immediately said,

"Father, remember Psalm 129?"

The priest was flustered and apologized profusely. He forced himself to

remove his hand. Changing gear, he let his hand slide up her leg again.

The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"

Once again the priest apologized, "Sorry, Sister, but the flesh is weak."

Arriving at the convent, the nun got out gave him a meaningful glance and

went on her way.

Upon his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to retrieve a bible and

looked up Psalm 129. It Said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find

glory."

Moral of the story:

If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great

opportunity.

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Corporate Lesson #3

A sales representative, an administration clerk, and the manager are

walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a

Genie comes out in a puff of smoke. The Genie says, "I usually only grant

three wishes, so I'll give each of you just one."

"Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas,

driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." Poof! She's gone.

In astonishment, "Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in

Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply

of pina coladas, and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone.

"OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager.

The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."

Moral of the story:

Always let your boss have the first say.

[ovrdose]

haha corporate lessons with a twist, love the first one.

[anotherway83]

heard the first one and the third one elsewhere...like the second one best