Jump to content
Clubplanet Nightlife Community

FUNNY


Guest shannon_coolj.

Recommended Posts

Guest shannon_coolj.

Anyone got any good jokes?

I haven't heard any in a long time...

The last one I heard was -

Why was the blonde snorting lines of Sweet and Low?

She thought it was Diet Coke!

;D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 80
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Guest r3nz0

Why did Michael Jackson start the race 30 seconds late?

He wanted to come in a little behind.

;D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest pod

All my good ones are ethnic jokes!

Why doesn't Mexico have a Summer Olympics team this year?

Because everyone that can run, jump, and swim is in the United States.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest r3nz0

oh shit renzo...that was too much..lol......

lmao.....cant breath... ;D

still cant breath.... ;)

;D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest bcnjunkie

All my good ones are ethnic jokes!

Why doesn't Mexico have a Summer Olympics team this year?

Because everyone that can run, jump, and swim is in the United States.

;D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest r3nz0

Why can't Ray Charles read?

Because he is black!

Oooooooooh pod, you're treading in dangerous waters there. :P

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest pod

Hey, you heard about the

new Italian Tires?

Dago round.

Dago through mud.

Dago through snow.

Dago everywhere.

And when Dago flat, Dago

Wop, Wop, Wop...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest pod

Three pregnant woman were happily knitting in

a doctor's waiting room.

After a while, one of them put down her wool and

swallowed a pill.

"If you don't mind me asking," the woman next to

her said, "What was the tablet you just took?"

"Iron," the woman replied. "I don't want my baby

to be anemic."

The mum-to-be smiled, stopped knitting, then popped

a tablet of her own.

"I take calcium," she explained. "I want my baby

to have strong bones."

A few minutes later, the third expectant mother laid

her needles aside and emptied half a bottle of medicine

down her throat.

"It's Thalidomide," she volunteered. "I don't know

how to knit sleeves!"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Clarisa

Why are married women heavier than single women?

- Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.

- Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.

THIS IS SO TRUE. ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest shannon_coolj.

Why are married women heavier than single women?

- Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.

- Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.

THIS IS SO TRUE. ;)

lol ;D ;D ;D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest r3nz0

Why did God give women orgasms?

So they would have something else to moan about. 8)

What's the difference between a leather shoe and a woman with herpes?

If you had to, you could eat the leather shoe. 8)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Clarisa

How does a man show he is planning for the future?

He buys two cases of beer.

THAT ONE CRACKS ME UP ;D :D ;D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest r3nz0

How does a man show he is planning for the future?

He buys two cases of beer.

THAT ONE CRACKS ME UP ;D :D ;D

Hey, wassup with the guy-bashing? :P;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Clarisa

Just for that I'll lay out another one....

Man says to GOD: Why did you make the woman so beautiful?

GOD says: So you can love her.

"But GOD" says man, "why did you make her so dumb?"

GOD said: So she can love you.

;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest r3nz0

A woman standing naked in front of a bedroom mirror says to her husband, "Honey, I look fat, ugly, and pale. Give me a compliment to cheer me up."

The husband thinks for a second and replies, "At least there's nothing wrong with your eyesight." :P

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest LeVeL

These are all women Jokes............

Why do women have smaller feet than men?

It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows

them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.

Why do men fart more than women?

Because women can't shut up long enough to

build up the required pressure.

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?

The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...

×
×
  • Create New...