Guest Clarisa Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 One more point on my going to hell card for laughing at this one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest shannon_coolj. Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 God decided he needed a vacation. One of his aides suggested Venus."Forget it," God said. "I went there 10,000 years ago and got sunburned.Another aide suggested Jupiter. "No way," God replied. "I went there5,000 years ago and froze my arse off". A third advisor suggested Earth."That's the worst," God answered angrily. "I was there 2,000 years ago and they're still accusing me of knocking up some stupid Jewish bitch!"that's so wrong in so many ways... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pod Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 I've already broken most of the Commandments, so it's no skin off my back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Clarisa Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 OOOH, I just passed post 69. Too bad it wasn't physical :'( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ryan2772 Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 OOOH, I just passed post 69. Too bad it wasn't physical :'(dirty, dirty girl! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bcnjunkie Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 God decided he needed a vacation. One of his aides suggested Venus."Forget it," God said. "I went there 10,000 years ago and got sunburned.Another aide suggested Jupiter. "No way," God replied. "I went there5,000 years ago and froze my arse off". A third advisor suggested Earth."That's the worst," God answered angrily. "I was there 2,000 years ago and they're still accusing me of knocking up some stupid Jewish bitch!"too funny ;D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pod Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 A teenager comes home from school and asks her mother "Is it true what Rita just told me? Babies come out of the same place where boys put their dicks?""Yes, dear" replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up and she wouldn't have to explain it to her daughter."But then when I have a baby," responded the teenager "won't it knock my teeth out?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrzyC1414779017 Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 A teenager comes home from school and asks her mother "Is it true what Rita just told me? Babies come out of the same place where boys put their dicks?""Yes, dear" replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up and she wouldn't have to explain it to her daughter."But then when I have a baby," responded the teenager "won't it knock my teeth out?"OMG...I have to remember this one!!!! ;D ;D ;D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest coach Posted May 22 Report Share Posted May 22 Has this one been told, yet?A scotsman and a frenchman were walking down the road when they spied a sheep with it's head caught in the barb wire. The scotsman says, "Pardon me," heads over to the sheep, lifts his kilt, and shag the h**l out of it. When he finishes, he realizes what he's done, and with an abashed look on his face, turns to the frenchmen, and says, "Sorry, me laddie, tis your turn." The frenchman looks concerned and says, "Oui, but won't the barbwire hurt my neck?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pod Posted June 4 Report Share Posted June 4 Up! 8) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ryan2772 Posted June 4 Report Share Posted June 4 Up! 8)that joke sucks, pod. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest r3nz0 Posted June 4 Report Share Posted June 4 Up! 8)LOLThat one cracks me up every time; an oldie, but a goodie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ryan2772 Posted June 4 Report Share Posted June 4 http://www.rit.edu/~jts0422/Movies/Group_X_video.swfbang bang bang! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest VeLeNoRoSa Posted June 5 Report Share Posted June 5 What it is at the back yard of Michael jacksons house???...................................................An abusement park Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest durrtylexx Posted June 5 Report Share Posted June 5 God decided he needed a vacation. One of his aides suggested Venus."Forget it," God said. "I went there 10,000 years ago and got sunburned.Another aide suggested Jupiter. "No way," God replied. "I went there5,000 years ago and froze my arse off". A third advisor suggested Earth."That's the worst," God answered angrily. "I was there 2,000 years ago and they're still accusing me of knocking up some stupid Jewish bitch!" ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;DPod is the winner...LMMFAO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest shannon_coolj. Posted June 5 Report Share Posted June 5 What a Woman Says...What a Man Hears What a woman says:This place is a mess! C'mon, you and I need to clean up, Your stuff is lying on the floor and you'll have no clothes to wear, if we don't do laundry right now!What a man hears:blah, blah, blah, blah, C'MONblah, blah, blah, blah, YOU AND Iblah, blah, blah, blah, ON THE FLOORblah, blah, blah, blah, NO CLOTHESblah, blah, blah, blah, RIGHT NOW Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pod Posted June 5 Report Share Posted June 5 Famous Last Words"What the fuck was that?" Mayor of Hiroshima "That's not a real fucking gun" John Lennon "Who's gonna fucking find out" Richard Nixon "Heads are going to fucking roll" Henry VIII "Any fucking idiot could understand that" Albert Einstein "It does so fucking look like her!" Picasso "How the fuck did you figure that out?" Pythagoras "You want what on the fucking ceiling?" Michaelangelo "You're all fucking liars!" Oliver North "Fuck you, Fuck you, and Fuck you. Who's next?" Eddie Murphy "Fuck a duck" Walt Disney "Why? Because its fucking there" Edmund Hillary "I don't suppose its gonna fucking rain?" Joan of Arc "Scattered showers my fucking ass!" Noah "Who let the fucking woman drive?" Commander of the space shuttle "Challenger" "Where the fuck did all these fucking Indians come from?" General Custer "Where the fuck is all this water coming from?" Captain of the Titanic Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest r3nz0 Posted June 5 Report Share Posted June 5 What do you call someone's else cheese?Nacho cheese.What do you call a dog with no legs?Doesn't matter; he won't come. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest r3nz0 Posted June 5 Report Share Posted June 5 A guy came into a bar one day and said to the barman "Give me six double vodkas."The barman says, "Wow! you must have had one hell of a day.""Yes, I've just found out my older brother is gay."The next day the same guy came into the bar and asked for the same drinks. When the bartender asked what the problem was today, the answer came back."I've just found out that my younger brother is gay too!"On the third day the guy came into the bar and ordered another six double vodkas.The bartender said: "Jesus! Doesn't anybody in your family like women?""Yeah... my wife!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest shannon_coolj. Posted June 5 Report Share Posted June 5 What do you call someone's else cheese?Nacho cheese. :-\ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest r3nz0 Posted June 5 Report Share Posted June 5 :-\Yeah, nacho cheese is whack. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest durrtylexx Posted June 5 Report Share Posted June 5 A guy came into a bar one day and said to the barman "Give me six double vodkas."The barman says, "Wow! you must have had one hell of a day.""Yes, I've just found out my older brother is gay."The next day the same guy came into the bar and asked for the same drinks. When the bartender asked what the problem was today, the answer came back."I've just found out that my younger brother is gay too!"On the third day the guy came into the bar and ordered another six double vodkas.The bartender said: "Jesus! Doesn't anybody in your family like women?""Yeah... my wife!"OUUCH lol.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ryan2772 Posted June 6 Report Share Posted June 6 What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable?The wheelchair. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JMT Posted June 7 Report Share Posted June 7 What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable?The wheelchair.oh my Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pod Posted June 7 Report Share Posted June 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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