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Rules (That Guys Wished Girls Knew)...


cmb1975

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If you think you are fat, you probably are. Do not ask us. We refuse to answer.

Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.

Do not cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then, you are stuck with her.

Birthdays, Valentines Day, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again!

Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it. Do not ask us

what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such

topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation and Nascar.

Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

Shopping is not a sport, and no, we are never going to think of it that

way.

When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

You have enough clothes. You have too many shoes.

Crying is blackmail.

Your ex-boyfriend is an idiot.

Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work. Strong hints do not work. Obvious hints do not work. Just say it!

We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar.

Remind us frequently beforehand.

Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be

any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, that would look good with your dress?

Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what

we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

Foreign films are best left to foreigners.

Check your oil. Please.

Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact,

all comments become null and void after 7 days.

If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us act

like soap opera guys.

If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.

You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done-not

both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months

when we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends like their relationship is SO MUCH better.

ALL men see in only 16 colors, like windows default settings. Peach, for

example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no

idea what mauve is.

If it itches, it will be scratched.

We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading

ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's

wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

What the heck is a doily?

------------------

tinkerbell.gif

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.

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