OFFICE JOKE--FUNNY SHIT

[ggg13]

TOP 10 WAYS TO BE THE FUNNIEST GUY IN YOUR OFFICE

10. Keep telling the same person they have bad breath even if they

don't,

and then punch them in the face.

9. Announce in a meeting that you have AIDS. After everyone gives you

the

sympathy remarks, tell everyone you were kidding and call them a bunch

of

queers.

8. Before a meeting, fill your mouth with custard. In the meeting

pretend

you're hocking up a loogie, spit it into a glass and hand it to the

person

next to you and say "BEAT THAT!"

7. Inform a male co-worker that he would make a good hooker, then piss

in

his coffee and tell him he needs a good ass fucking.

6. Always walk around with a big smile and keep one hand down the front

of

your pants.

5. Answer every question with " Fucked if I know...", then call the

person

next to you a racial slur that doesn't even match their race.

4. Brag about the fact that you carry a gun, and keep playing with your

nuts. Get them really sweaty and go around shaking everyone's hand.

3. Run down the hall with your dick out spraying piss everywhere

yelling "It

wont stop! God help me it wont stop!" Then when it does, look down and

say,

"Oh! I must have broken it."

2. Ask to borrow a co-worker's expensive pen. Bring it to the bathroom

and

stick it up your ass - return it to the person and tell them that it

smells

bad and tell them to smell it. When they say that it smells, say "It

should

- I had it up my ass!"

1. Shit on your office floor and when someone comes in and sees it,

tell

them it's the fake rubber kind. When they try to pick it up and realize

that

their hand is full of real shit - embarrass them in front of everyone.