gwyllion Posted November 15 Report Share Posted November 15 Just out of curiosity.... My ex of 9 months just informed me that his new girlfriend (of 8 months) can't stand when we talk. Dude... they both live back in Ohio where nothing could even potentially happen between he and I - so what's her problem??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
georgym Posted November 15 Report Share Posted November 15 And the fact that they're in O-HI-O just makes her worries more wacky! Me and my ex shall remain friends for as long as i know...But then , there''s still that "possibility" that we'll get together which we've both acknowledged. Maybe that's what's buggin his g/f.There's always gonna be that jealousy there... how often do you guys speak? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gwyllion Posted November 15 Author Report Share Posted November 15 We talk very infrequently. Maybe twice a month for like 5 or 10 minutes. Actually, I went up to visit where his girlfriend lives (my brother lives there and we visited for his birthday) last month and asked if he would mind meeting up quickly. I even mentioned meeting his girlfriend. Unfortunately, he had something to do out of town that weekend (moving into a new apartment), but thought he could possibly make it up to visit for a little. So, I call him and he's still at home 1 hour 1/2 away. No big deal... I knew it would be difficult and I wasn't bummed at all. But then he goes and tells me today that when I called him then that his new girl totally bugged out on him and has been giving him a hard time about us keeping in touch since they've been together.I feel shitty for even posting this, but these are his words:" I have to tell you something that has been bothering me for a while. When you called from, Laura flipped out on me. I knew she wasn't comfortable with me seeing you. It's a shitty situation, but I understand where she is coming from. I would not be pumped if she was in touch with an old boyfriend. She is an awesome girl, and she is really sensitive about stuff like that. It has been hard for me to deal with because I care about you as a friend, but I get a lot of shit for keeping in touch with you. I just wanted to let you know. I have been trying to figure out stuff, and it has been hard for me to deal with. I hope that you understand."So what am I to do? Never speak to him.... I think it might be easier. I don't want to feel like I'm making his life a living hell like it probably already is..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
georgym Posted November 16 Report Share Posted November 16 Well, i'm glad to see you're taking this well... For me, it was tough to even hear my ex had dated a few guys after only one month of out breakup (i guess that's how things go )I wouldn't show much care for this guy if i were you. he sounds confused, and it would only make it worse for you guys calling each other up like that..his girl will feel left out-See, i've been the one callin my ex lately, and i'm gettin fed up with it...why not lay off calling him for like one month, and then just call and wish him a Merry Christmas when that time rolls around---his new fiance can't blame you for calling then, and it will get the point to his girl that you two aren't an "item" anymore -Hope this helps Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fierydesire Posted November 19 Report Share Posted November 19 current b/fs or g/fs will always be jealous. I don't know why but perhaps they think that something can always occur. Imean think about it you were with that person before the new one came along..It is a jealousy thing. I was a bit jealous when my ex talken to his ex but I had every right b/c when we broke up the asshole went back out with that skank:mad: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuturephunk Posted November 20 Report Share Posted November 20 . . If she's willing to come out and say to him that it bothers her and he's willing to accept that, then I would say that you should tell him that you two can't speak anymore. . I know that sounds hard, but think about it . . like he said, he would be bugged out if she was talking to an ex who is a friend. He's gotten the same reaction from her, so the only option is to tip yall's hats and say good day . . It's the only way that won't involve a nasty fight that could lead to a breakup and unhappiness to all parties involved. . . I guarantee she understands that you two are friends, but all to often the "friends" scenario turns into the "secretive fuck-buddies" scenerio, even if you two are several states away from each other . . It's a whole system of trust that has to be maintained and unfortunately, you being involved doesn't foster that system . . . . Just a thought . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jamaica Posted November 26 Report Share Posted November 26 He hates it, but i was with my ex for 3 years. So we have a lot of history together, but it's over. And we only talk about bullshit anyway:tongue: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flying_high Posted November 27 Report Share Posted November 27 Ok, I don’t think jealousy has necessary to do with the fear of them ending up together again (even if it’s only in a sexual sense). I rather think (at least that’s how it seems to be for me) that the thought and imagination of the one you love with some other person really bugs people out. I’m a very jealous person (unfortunately….I wish it wasn’t so) and I’m also very visual. So the problem is that I have those images in my head every time an ex is mentioned. I know it is stupid and totally unnecessary, as I’m not feeling really threatened by an ex…it’s just that image that I have trouble dealing with. So, I do understand your ex’s new girlfriend although I’m not quite sure that she wants him to end the contact with you. See, I’m really bugged out sometimes and my baby and me have had talks about it too (long and detailed). Still, I would never ever want him to break up any contact he still has with any of his ex-girlfriends. They are a part of his past and as much as it troubles me, it’s a fact I have to face and learn to deal with. Maybe you should not talk to him too frequently and maybe give the both of them some time to strengthen their relationship. Also, email is a good way of staying in touch without showing “too much closeness and involvement in each other’s life”…just a thought.Good luck though and I hope everything works out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gwyllion Posted November 27 Author Report Share Posted November 27 Thanks kids.... It's hard to accept the fact that some people just don't get it. In fact, I've just decided to give up. No more talking to him... It's just not worth my time. I have more important things to deal with than a bugged out girlfriend. (Perhaps she's heard about what happened on 9/11???) I just realized that if he has a problem with it too, then it's his loss - not mine. So sorry I gave him 3 yrs. of love, support, and total sacrifice - I guess it meant nothing to him. Two can play that game. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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