mugwump Posted December 11 Report Share Posted December 11 The following questions and answers were collated from SAT tests givenin Springdale, Arkansas in 2000 to 16 year old students! (Don't laughtoo hard - one of these may be the president someday.) Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar. Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe todrink. A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists. Q: How is dew formed? A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire. Q: What is a planet? A: A body of earth surrounded by sky. Q: What causes the tides in the oceans? A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All watertends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in thisfight. Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections? A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election. Q: What are steroids? A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs. Q: What happens to your body as you age? A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental. Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty? A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery. Q; Name a major disease associated with cigarettes. A: Premature death. Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? A: Keep it in the cow. Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (E.g., abdomen.) A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the boraxand the abdominal cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity containsthe five bowels, A,E,I,O and U. Q: What is the Fibula? A: A small lie. Q: What does "varicose" mean? A: Nearby. Q: What is the most common form of birth control? A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium. Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section." A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome. Q: What is a seizure? A: A Roman emperor. Q: What is a terminal illness? A: When you are sick at the airport Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature? A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas. Q: What does the word "benign" mean? A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight. Q: What is a turbine? A: Something an Arab wears on his head. Q: What is a Hindu? A: It lays eggs. :shake: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeg Posted December 11 Report Share Posted December 11 LOL, theres no way.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
georgym Posted December 11 Report Share Posted December 11 Q: What is a planet? A: A body of earth surrounded by sky. that is hilarious. i didn't too too well on my sat's (1060) but ended up getting a 3.2 at a respectable school. GO FIGURE Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xtotaleclipsex Posted December 11 Report Share Posted December 11 I don't remember the SAT's having questions like that?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeg Posted December 11 Report Share Posted December 11 yeah, I don't remember the SATs being open-ended.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuturephunk Posted December 11 Report Share Posted December 11 . . . WE'RE DOOMED!! . . . . . . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maximman Posted December 11 Report Share Posted December 11 Originally posted by mugwump Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar. hahha... just keep reading that one until you get it... :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
remy5150 Posted December 11 Report Share Posted December 11 Originally posted by maximman hahha... just keep reading that one until you get it... :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: yeah mustard's not a season Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maximman Posted December 11 Report Share Posted December 11 Originally posted by remy5150 yeah mustard's not a season it's the salt and pepper that CRACKS me up... hahhaha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xwave3000 Posted December 12 Report Share Posted December 12 I really don't get the joke. Maybe you're posting on the wrong board. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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