They Found my couch!!!

[Evan]

http://dailynews.yahoo.com/h/nypost/20020512/lo/junkies_so_close_yet_sofa_away_from_8m_stash_1.html

JUNKIES SO CLOSE, YET 'SOFA' AWAY FROM $8M STASH

By MARIANNE GARVEY, GARY MILLER and LAURA ITALIANO

Crackheads in one South Bronx neighborhood are huffing and puffing over their crazy luck.

For three weeks, they'd been lounging on a discarded couch on a litter-strewn sidewalk near the Bruckner Expressway, only to learn from Post reporters yesterday that cops found $8 million in cocaine hidden inside.

The news left one homeless woman staring aghast at the pile of beer bottles and broken wood where the already-legendary couch once sat. She was speechless, except for two words, which she repeated again and again.

"Holy f - - -! Holy f- - -!"

The couch cocaine cache - discovered by sanitation workers when they tossed it in their truck and a white cloud exploded from the compactor - weighed a whopping 170 kilos.

Cops are still trying to figure out where the coke came from, why it was hidden in the couch, and how the couch came to be abandoned on East 137th Street in Port Morris.

But maybe it's for the best that no one discovered the drug-drenched divan, noted one homeless woman, who gave her name as Kimberly.

First, there'd be a big party - then, she said, all those overdoses.

"There'd be a bunch of dead homeless people, 'cause we'd be taking it, stealing it, sniffing it," she mused.

"We all get high around here," added a man who gave his name as Yul.

"Whoever put that cocaine in that couch is a dead man," Kimberly snorted. "Check the river."

Evan

[phuturephunk]

. . . That homeless woman is soooo right . . whoever that guy was, he's in the river . . .hell . . his distro guy probably fed him to the ocean while offshoring . . .

. . or so says conventional wizdom . . . . .