Jump to content
Clubplanet Nightlife Community

How To Kill Yourself


Recommended Posts

What you'll need:

A tank of helium; helium is widely used to inflate balloons. If the tank holds enough helium to inflate 600 ballons, you'll have more than enough: that's 20 big breaths a minute, times 30 minutes.

A suitable valve; this should be obtained from the same source as the tank. Be careful when opening this valve, as the gas is highly pressurized. Never put your mouth directly on the output nozzle, or serious injury may occur.

An oxygen mask; this can be obtained from a medical supplier. Note that the mask may be designed to mix the gas with air, in which case you must modify it, so that it supplies 100% gas. This can usually be done with duct tape.

A four foot length of rubber tubing; this may come with the mask, otherwise try a hardware store. If the tank's nozzle and the mask inlet have different diameters, try using several different diameters of tubing, each fit within the other, and thoroughly sealed with duct tape.

Instructions:

If you're indoors, open all available windows. Attach the valve to the tank, if it's not already attached. Now attach one end of the tubing to the valve outlet, and the other end to the mask. Test your connections to make sure nothing leaks. Recline or sit, in such a way that you can't fall over, for example in bed or on a sofa, propped up with pillows. Strap the mask onto your face, so that your mouth and nose are covered. Turn on the valve, and breathe normally. Your voice will become high-pitched almost immediately, and in few minutes, you will lose consciousness. Within fifteen minutes, you will be dead, due to asphyxiation. Make sure you will not be disturbed for at least thirty minutes, just to be sure. If you are discovered and revived, you may have permanent brain damage.

Frequently asked questions:

1. A 600-ballon tank is hard to find and/or too heavy, will a 400-balloon tank work?

400 balloons is somewhere between 400 and 800 breaths of helium, depending on the balloon size and your lung capacity. You might want to see how many breaths it takes for you to blow up a balloon, which will give you a better estimate of your capacity. You also need to know how many breaths you take per minute, so time yourself with a wristwatch. Of course this depends on your physical and emotional state: for example if you're upset you'll breathe faster. Let's say you find that it takes you 1.5 breaths to fill up a balloon, and that you take 20 breaths a minute when reasonably relaxed. So:

400 * 1.5 = 600 breaths in the tank.

600 / 20 = 30 minutes.

30 minutes without *any* oxygen would definitely kill you. But the problem is, you'll still be getting some amount of oxygen, because even the best mask doesn't seal perfectly. Let's say you're getting 75% helium:

30 * .75 = 22 minutes.

22 minutes is still enough to do the job, so yes, a 400-balloon tank will work, provided you have a suitable mask that seals well, and provided you don't waste a lot of helium testing your mask and connections. But there's very little room for error, and that's why we recommend a 600-ballon tank: to avoid failure and a high probability of brain damage, you want to be absolutely sure you won't run out of gas.

2. Where can I find a suitable helium tank, and/or an oxygen mask?

You can order an oxygen mask here:

US Med

And helium here (check your local yellow pages too):

helium.net

balloonbouquetsnyc.com

carrboro.com

balloonplace.com

bubblesofjoy.com

redballoon.com

usnovelty.com

track2.com

gasexample.jpgoxygenmask.jpg

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by notallthere

thanks :D SO is your name :tongue:

if you werent so stupid. you would realize its a song, but your ass listens to the final chapter all day long. also you posts about 10 topics a day that make no sense just to get posts. your pathetic!
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by godisadj

if you werent so stupid. you would realize its a song, but your ass listens to the final chapter all day long. also you posts about 10 topics a day that make no sense just to get posts. your pathetic!

I really do though. I have a walkman on right now playing final chapter. Then when I get in the shower I have the shower CD player with it on, then the car in the 5 disc CD changer I have 40 different versions of the final chapter. At the gym I ask them to play the final chapter then I make it threw the week and go to temps and I here final chapter I love final chapter so much final chapter is my life. It will be my wedding song and my funeral song. Your name still is stupid and the shit you post is boring. Stop thinking so highly of yourself cause you aint nuthen but a sheep baaaaaah baaaah

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 6 months later...
Originally posted by kikilicious

how about getting a long rope and hanging yourself? fyi wire works better because it wont break.

I don't know....the whole choking thing is scary for me......gasping for air sux......but it does do the job...and i believe that hanging is one of the most popular ways used today...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by notallthere

What you'll need:

A tank of helium; helium is widely used to inflate balloons. If the tank holds enough helium to inflate 600 ballons, you'll have more than enough: that's 20 big breaths a minute, times 30 minutes.

A suitable valve; this should be obtained from the same source as the tank. Be careful when opening this valve, as the gas is highly pressurized. Never put your mouth directly on the output nozzle, or serious injury may occur.

The funny party about this whole post is the last sentence above.

The thread is explaining how to kill yourself, but it warns you "not to put your mouth directly on the nozzel, or serious injury might occur"

Thats very focking funny!

:D :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 7 months later...

go to any foundery or pipe maker, like griffith pipe, us pipe, both on main st in florence, id stil prefer to get a super strong enzyme and disolve my victim, however if i was to kill myself i would want it fast and fun.. gun, bomb, car, fall, overdose. If your gonna use gas to kill urself use argon, it will do the job fast, 10x heavier then air and will knock u out before u know u cant breath well, and it stays in your lungs so dont plan on coming back.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
×
×
  • Create New...