phatman Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 EVER WONDER.......1. Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards: NAIVE2. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?3. OK.... so if the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the "Jags" and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs," what does that make the Tennessee Titans?4. If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea...does that mean that one enjoys it?5. There are three religious truths:a. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.b. Protestants do not recognize the Pope asthe leader of the Christian faith.c. Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or at Hooters.6. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?7. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?8. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?9. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?10. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?11. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?12. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted,cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?13. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?14. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?15. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?16. I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me ....they're cramming for their final exam.17. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? toothpicks?18. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?19. If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?20. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.21. Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?22. If a cow laughed, would milk come out of her nose?23. Whatever happened to Preparations A through G? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dgmodel Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 LMAO... :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: ...LMAOwhere is that from??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phatman Posted February 11 Author Report Share Posted February 11 ...came through from a friend via email...doesnt cite source but some are hilarious... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dgmodel Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 definately funny shit... lol... i saw some of those before... i think the worst conversation in the world would happen if that person and i got together and started talking... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
guest00901 Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?hmmmmmmm ask Koester:idea: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djprotege Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 Originally posted by sexxybabyd What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?hmmmmmmm ask Koester:idea: Honda commercial Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
guest00901 Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 Originally posted by djprotege Honda commercial Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djprotege Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 Originally posted by sexxybabyd just sayin thats where it came from Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladyshady Posted February 11 Report Share Posted February 11 Originally posted by phatman 11. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one? .. lmao.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lolahotass Posted February 12 Report Share Posted February 12 :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reeni Posted February 12 Report Share Posted February 12 and the answer to 15 is there eye brows:D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fkornre Posted February 12 Report Share Posted February 12 :laugh: :laugh: gr8 thread... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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