LikmyLipz Posted January 11 Report Share Posted January 11 ECSTASYHow you think you behave: Like the beautiful, caring, wonderful person youreally are.How you actually behave: Like the creepy kid at school who always sucked upto the teacher. Those revolting sweaty hugs you inflict upon anyone you meetare disgusting.Likelihood of getting laid: 30%. Sex is not important. It's all about the"vibe".How you feel in the morning: Like you should have gone for the sex.Embarrassment rating: 6/10. Ecstasy makes you say nice things to people thatyou don't like. This can be very embarrassing, particularly if people believewhat you say. Be careful who you give your phone number to. They just mightcall.MARIJUANAHow you think you behave: You're not sure, but you think people could belaughing at you.How you actually behave: Like someone just hit you over the head with an 800kg fridge freezer combination.Likelihood! of getting laid: 60%. If you spend enough time on the couch,anything can happen.How you feel in the morning: Like another joint. And the rest of that pizza.Embarrassment rating: 1/10. You are moving so slowly that it's almostimpossible to do anything stupid.ALCOHOLHow you think you behave: Like the life of the party. You are sexy, funny andeverybody likes you.How you actually behave: Like the death of the party. Your behavior getsprogressively worse as you tell more and more crass jokes, insult thebartender, spill your drink and make a pass at your best friend's date.Likelihood of getting laid: 90% Your sexual standards drop dramatically witheach consecutive drink. If surrounded by others whose standards are alsolowered, then your chances are pretty good.How you feel in the morning: Who did I insult? Where is my car? Why did Isleep with someone from the office? I've never felt this bad before. This! isabsolutely the last time.Embarrassment rating:! 11/10 Not only are you stupid, you are sloppy. Everyonerecognizes this, except you.GHBHow you think you behave: You're in touch with your feelings and absolutelyfucking gorgeous. You're warm and friendly and connect with people, who forthe majority are fucking gorgeous.How you actually behave: You touch your body inappropriately. You touch otherpeoples bodies inappropriately. You have difficulty focusing, walking,standing...Likelihood of getting laid: 120% You'd fuck anything that has a pulse.Actually, that doorknob looks cute too.How you feel in the morning: Great.Embarrassment rating:A) 8/10 You sexually harassed everybody and their doorknob. If you do too much: 20/10 You pass out, you pee yourself, you shityourself, you vomit all over yourself, probably all in public.C) If you mix it with alcohol or downers: 0/10 You're dead.KETAMINEHow you think you behave: Could you repeat! the question? Wait where am I? Whoam I? Gimme a bump!How you actually behave: Like some sort of twisted cross between a deer inheadlights and an unintelligible zombie.Likelihood of getting laid: 1%. Chances are very slim. First you need to workon regaining consciousness, and "discovering" the way out of the club and orto a stall.How you feel in the morning: Like you wish you weren't still insideTwilo/Sound Factory.Embarrassment rating: 0/10 You probably won't be able to pronounce anythingremotely resembling any spoken language, so chances are you won't sayanything embarassing. However, if standing around, mouth wide open, like alawn ornament is your idea of embarassing, change rating to 10/10.COCAINEHow you think you behave: You are smart, irresistible and want to "do lunch"with everyone.How you actually behave: Like an annoying know-it-all who would sell his soulfor the next line of blow! .Likelihood of getting laid: 80% It may be a Jedi Mind! Trick, but when yousincerely believe you are so irresistible, some clueless and insecure typemay actually fall for it.How you feel in the morning: Like the ape man.Embarrassment rating:A) 0/10 if there's more coke in the drawer. 9/10 if there isn't.ACID or SHROOMSHow you think you behave: You are not behaving, but the world around you isputting on a pretty good show.How you actually behave: In reality, it is you putting on the show. The restof the world is behaving the same as ever.Likelihood of getting laid: 20% Even if you actually manage to get throughthe process of selecting a mate, removing your clothes and choosing a sexualposition, you will then have to deal with the challenge of your partnerchanging into a furry animal/the devil/your mother.How you feel in the morning: Either you are climbing the walls wishing thatGod would put an end to your suffering, or you finally understand! Huxley's"The Doors of Perception."Embarrassment rating: 0/10 You either sat on the couch and laughed at the TVall night (even if it was turned off), or you climbed onto a building, triedto fly and died.CRYSTAL METHHow you think you behave: A little: You are self-confident, sexy, full ofenergy and everybody wants you. A lot: Everybody is looking at you "funny",they make jokes about you and comment on your shortcomings, all of them. Youcan hear crystal clear (that's why it's called that way...) everythingnegative said about you, even if it is whispered into someone's ear at theother end of a crowded dance floor and the music pumping.How you actually behave: You are frantically looking around either to hook upor because you hear things and you dance two beats where there's only one.Likelihood of getting laid: A little: 100% You either hook up or go to a sexclub. A lot: 0% until you stop being sketchy,! if you stop being sketchy.(Then you go to a sex club.! )How you feel in the morning: What morning? You're still going or looking fordowners. But two days later stay away from tall buildings.Embarrassment rating: A little: 0/10 You think you're "it", but you don'ttell anybody ("cause they know..."). A lot: 0/10 to 10/10 Everybody is meanto you, but you don't tell anybody ("cause they know..."). Then you tell yourfriends and get pissed off at them for trying to tell you you're imaginingthings ("cause they don't know..."). Then you get sloppy and uncoordinatedand break things as you get mad at people for telling you what to do ("causethey don't know...").XOXOXO MWWWWWWWWWAHZ ------------------~LiPz~ aim:LikmyLipzicq:101504929"if g-d hates freaks so much, then why did he create them? Freaks are like gormet dishes in SoHo restaurants. Cucuembers with lemon mousse on salmon baked with chocolate. It dosen't make sence. Its inedible. But some chef keeps comming up with more and more bizarre combinations. And theres always people to eat them."/>http://hometown.aol.com/lipzlipzlipz/LIPZ.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quanto_magnus Posted January 11 Report Share Posted January 11 LOL!!That was pretty good... ------------------ Hugha.k.a. ibhugh, Bryan Adamsemail: ibhugh@yahoo.comaolim: hugesk8r Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rad_Z Posted January 11 Report Share Posted January 11 OMFG!!!!HAHaHThat is freaking hilarious stuff right there and soooo true! Did you come up with all of it or is there some web page or something?Rad_ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LikmyLipz Posted January 11 Author Report Share Posted January 11 Originally posted by Rad_Z:OMFG!!!!HAHaHThat is freaking hilarious stuff right there and soooo true! Did you come up with all of it or is there some web page or something?Rad_ someone emailed it to me...he wont tell me where he got it from.. ------------------~LiPz~ aim:LikmyLipzicq:101504929"if g-d hates freaks so much, then why did he create them? Freaks are like gormet dishes in SoHo restaurants. Cucuembers with lemon mousse on salmon baked with chocolate. It dosen't make sence. Its inedible. But some chef keeps comming up with more and more bizarre combinations. And theres always people to eat them."/>http://hometown.aol.com/lipzlipzlipz/LIPZ.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ggfella4 Posted January 11 Report Share Posted January 11 definatly very funny. i really enjoyed that. very true.peace out,gianni------------------AIM: GGFELLA4EMAIL: iannuzzi4@yahoo.com HOMER DANCING TO JOINTS!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trancedkitten Posted January 12 Report Share Posted January 12 hehe....true,true....-=*TrancEdkittEn*=- =^..^=------------------ ::::::Trancin' Is a Way Of Life:::::: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eviljav666 Posted January 12 Report Share Posted January 12 NO DOUBT!!!!!!!!!!!!! LIPZ that WAS GOOD.........~~~~~<<<<<<<#~~ KILL......KILL......KILL......... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lexxxi Posted January 12 Report Share Posted January 12 RALMFFAO!!!!That is outrageously funny. If you ever find out where your friend found this you have to tell us!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lmsadc69 Posted January 12 Report Share Posted January 12 I just want to say thanks for throwing the Jedi Mind Tricks reference in there... they absolutely blow up.. Trinity is like my favorite song.. that or genghis khan. ~~------------------ "Happy the man, and happy he alone, he who can call today his own, he who, secure within, can say, 'Tomorrow do thy worst, for I have liv'd today'." - Horace"Be excellent to each other." - Rufus"Para no morir, tiene que bailar." - Ricky Martin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gonzojournilist Posted January 12 Report Share Posted January 12 that was hilarious! ------------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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