vampienyc10 Posted January 26 Report Share Posted January 26 Sorry girls but this is hilarious !How many men does it take to open a beer?None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.Why do women have smaller feet than men?It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?When she starts her sentence with "A man once told me. . ."How do you fix a woman's watch?You don't. There is a clock on the oven.Why do men fart more than women?Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?The dog of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?A woman who won't do what she's told.I married Miss Right.I just didn't know her first name was Always.I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her.What do you call a woman who has lost 95% of her intelligence?Divorced.Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.It is called Wedding Cake.Marriage is a 3 ring circus:Engagement Ring, Wedding Ring, Suffer-Ring.Our last fight was my fault: My wife asked me "What's on the TV?"I said, "Dust!"In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created Man and rested. Then God created Woman. Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.Why do men die before their wives?They want to.------------------AIM vampie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gravity Posted January 26 Report Share Posted January 26 Fucking hilarious... sending this along to all my biaaatches so they finally understand ------------------"The world is a better place because of those who refuse to believe they can't fly." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vampienyc10 Posted January 26 Author Report Share Posted January 26 Shit Gary, now I KNOW it IS funny if YOU say so !! LOL!! How are you hun !!! Have a nice weekend!------------------AIM vampie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stompy Posted January 26 Report Share Posted January 26 damn, im stil cracking upwk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
j303j Posted January 26 Report Share Posted January 26 lmao!!!!! best thing i read all day. ------------------ IM LIKE JIMMY WALKER, DYNAMITE!!!!!!pistol packin, monkey drinkin, no money bum, im from jersey cause that's where im from!!!!AOL J303J Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeydollaz Posted January 26 Report Share Posted January 26 yay ,,, hi vampie ! you are truely man's best friend we love you come to limelight tonight ! call me !------------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gravity Posted January 27 Report Share Posted January 27 Originally posted by vampienyc10:Shit Gary, now I KNOW it IS funny if YOU say so !! LOL!! How are you hun !!! Have a nice weekend!I'm good...and I'm glad you recognize that I set the standard for what is and what isn't. Whats your weekend plan?------------------"The world is a better place because of those who refuse to believe they can't fly." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vampienyc10 Posted January 27 Author Report Share Posted January 27 Who knows...how about you ???------------------AIM vampie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lexxxi Posted January 27 Report Share Posted January 27 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAThat is some funny shiot!!! ------------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
musiclover Posted January 27 Report Share Posted January 27 That was great shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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