pookie23 Posted October 16 Report Share Posted October 16 For all of you fair weather Yankee fans sitting at home and gloating over your victory, I'd like you to really, truly think about why you like these Yankees. Moreover, I'd like you think about why you should hate them. Here, I'll help you out: 1) Derek Jeter. Is this guy really that good looking? I don't get it. Perhaps I'm jealous, or perhaps I'm letting my hatred of his team blind me, but I really think I'm being objective when I say that this guy looks like a f*cking alien. Tino Martinez? Not a bad looking dude. Paul O'Neill? Handsome, I'd say, in a rugged, alcoholic Irish sense. But Jeter? I mean, c'mon. If the guy wasn't a baseball player and he was hanging out in some sh*tty a$$ under-17 club in Rockland County, not one girl in the bar would turn her head unless they thought someone was filming Cocoon 3. 2) Joe Torre. Yeah we get it. You're a nice guy. A good manager. You cry when your team wins. But who the fu#k picks their nose this much? My mom says it's unfair to have a camera on you in the dugout when you don't know people are watching. Agreed. Yet, you could have a camera on me 24 hours a day and maybe you catch me picking a boog three times. This guy does it six times every half hour. Buy yourself a kleenex you ugly creep. He looks like someone who might molest my little cousin on Halloween. People who look like him are the reason my mom used to go through my Halloween candy to make sure there were no razor blades. 3) Luis Sojo. Yeah, this guy's awesome. He looks like he should be a busboy at the Burrito Loco. If this guy eats one more chalupa he's gonna f*cking explode. 4) Jose Vizcaino. He should be working with Luis Sojo. Nice glasses dipsh%t. 5) Roger Clemens. This guy's a piece of work. They say he's not a "real Yankee." That the rest of the Yankees shouldn't be judged by his idiotic personality/behavior/mentality. Bull * . He's the prototypical Yankee. A mercenary superstar who only cares about money and acts like a total a$$hole. He should be the new Yankees logo. Get rid of the "NY" symbol. Just a giant picture of Clemens throwing shattered bats at players and hitting them in the heads with 100 mile an hour baseballs. And Kissing Babe Ruth's monument before the game? F- you Clemens. I hope the monument has herpes. 6) Bernie Williams. Here's a pretty guy. Not only did he fall off the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down, but then he hit the ground and got really disfigured. And to compensate for his looks, he's got the most outgoing personality this side of Adam Hirschberg. This is a guy you can really get behind and root for. 7) Andy Pettite. Kind of like him actually. Still a homo. 8) El Duque. Oh don't even get me started here. The Cuban refugee. What a story! For the rest of the year, every night before I go to bed, I promise to fall to my knees and pray to God that this guy gets deported and spends the rest of his days rotting away in a Cuban jail cell decorated only with posters of Fidel Castro and cigars. And what kind of name is El Duque? I'd like to make a big Duque in his mouth-ue. 9) Mariano Rivera. Hate this guy as much as any of the others. Maybe he should try eating something. This dude spits and loses six pounds. I heard someone poured champagne on him after they won and he slid down a sewer drain and drowned. 10) Yankee fans. Without bias, I find you all to be the most insuferable, fair weather, ignorant fans in the world. Know this: no matter how many championships you win, you have a BORING, UNLIKABLE, UN-EXCITING TEAM. If I was a Yankee fan myself I would find it hard to root for them. May they all rot in hell. I'm thru with this subject - Let's go Mariners!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mfiorellino Posted October 16 Report Share Posted October 16 Hey genius, Jose Vizcaino doesn't play for the Yankees anymore. Get your shit correct. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bxbomb Posted October 16 Report Share Posted October 16 Hate on Hayta....one more mistake, Clemens wipes his sweat on Babes forehead(he doesnt kiss it). Please come correct if your gonna make a feeble attempt at disparaging one of the greatest dynasties in sports history. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystalmethod Posted October 16 Report Share Posted October 16 Spragga,Suck it.BTW - everyone of them has rings... even Luis Sojo who hits clutch singles.I know you're doing this just to get us annoyed, you're failing miserably... I think its hilarious. Cya at the meetup, playa. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
synderella420 Posted October 16 Report Share Posted October 16 Spragga will you just get over this jealousy already!!! lol!!And please dont ever insult that qt Jeter!!!: :tongue: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pookie23 Posted October 16 Author Report Share Posted October 16 Originally posted by synderella420 Spragga will you just get over this jealousy already!!! lol!!And please dont ever insult that qt Jeter!!!: :tongue: OKAY...THAT'S IT!!NO NIPPLE GAME FOR YOU!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
synderella420 Posted October 16 Report Share Posted October 16 lmaooooo!!! :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
illlogik Posted October 16 Report Share Posted October 16 LOL i am fuckin on the ground laughing my ass offf!!!! that shit was funny as hell!!! "BORING, UNLIKABLE, UN-EXCITING TEAM" where the hell do you get off saying this??? explain more..Jeter is destined to be a hall of famer. Another Yankee legend, as proved with his recent extremely athletic plays. El Duque- means "the kid"Vizcaino, come on man u must not know what your talking about!Joe Torre, who cares if he pick's his shit. A real baseball player wouldn't give a fuck who was watching.. Its all about picking your nose, hockin lougies, dippin, and grabbing your privates!Roger Clemens is a fuckin role model. The man is soo dedicated its not even funny. Hes an animal, he does what he has to do to win ball games, and he wins!Mariano Rivera - second on the Yankees' all-time saves list with 165 (Dave Righetti is the leader with 224) and had recorded 30 or more saves in each of his last four seasons (tying Righetti for most 30-save seasons by a Yankee)Converted 36-of-41 save opportunities....the list goes on and on and onMariners! pahhhleazzzzAs someone else has said in a previous thread, your just Jealous because your FLushing Faggots cant' win!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crystalmethod Posted October 16 Report Share Posted October 16 HehheI coined that term, Flushing Faggots (No disrespect on the offensiveness of the term.) I guess we could using Flushing Fucks tooFlushing Freaks?Flushing Fools? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
illlogik Posted October 16 Report Share Posted October 16 Originally posted by crystalmethod HehheI coined that term, Flushing Faggots (No disrespect on the offensiveness of the term.) I guess we could using Flushing Fucks tooFlushing Freaks?Flushing Fools? hahah yeah it was you!! good shit bro Freaks, Fools, Faggots it all works. :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JonStephen Posted October 16 Report Share Posted October 16 One memo to Jeter fans..................Nomar is better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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