phuturephunk Posted February 14 Report Share Posted February 14 . . .any suggestions on how to torture my minions? . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeg Posted February 14 Report Share Posted February 14 start out be delegating all your shitwork to them. Call them "chief" and "sport" respectively. If they need help, instead of just telling them the answer, tell them where to find it, but vaguely and without giving too much away.Take a 2 hour lunch, and takea cig break every 45 minutes. Come in late, Leave early.Call it a day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeg Posted February 14 Report Share Posted February 14 oh, and fire any of the ones with romantic plans tonight... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
senorfern Posted February 14 Report Share Posted February 14 Originally posted by joeg Call them "chief" and "sport" respectively. Do what my head trader does...he calls everybody bitches. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuturephunk Posted February 14 Author Report Share Posted February 14 . . well I came in late already . . and I've already had 3 smoke breaks since 8:45 when I got here . . . I'm leaving at 2 to go to a meeting at 3 up on main campus . . . I pretty much get to dick around for an hour then go home an hour before I usually do . . . . . shit work has already been reassigned to the hot girl up on main campus who conveniently decided not to get back to me yesterday on an urgent issue because she was too busy gabbing with one of the boys in the department . . . She will now have to suffer through several hours of paperwork because of me . . . . .. . . Remember Kids, DONT FUCK WITH ME!!! . . . BWAAAHHAAAHAAAAHAAAHAAAHAAA! . . . . . . . . . . . .I fucking hate Valentines Day . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeg Posted February 14 Report Share Posted February 14 maybe you just need to have a "CLOSED DOOR MEETING" (WINK WINK, WINK WINK) with that hot girl... that'll brighten your day, sport! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuturephunk Posted February 14 Author Report Share Posted February 14 Originally posted by joeg maybe you just need to have a "CLOSED DOOR MEETING" (WINK WINK, WINK WINK) with that hot girl... that'll brighten your day, sport! . . . FUCK THAT . . . . . . we're you not listening about what I said when Tits and Ass overrule Logic and Reason . . .. . .You're slipping son . . . . tighten up!!! . . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeg Posted February 14 Report Share Posted February 14 Originally posted by phuturephunk . . . FUCK THAT . . . . . . we're you not listening about what I said when Tits and Ass overrule Logic and Reason . . .. . .You're slipping son . . . . tighten up!!! . . . . ok, threaten to fire her ass, when she begs for her job and says she'll do "ANYTHING" to keep it... take her up on it... then fire her anyway...THERE, SLIPPING MY ASS. I'll RULE THIS COMPANY WITH AN IRON FUCKING FIST GOD DAMNIT!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuturephunk Posted February 14 Author Report Share Posted February 14 Originally posted by joeg ok, threaten to fire her ass, when she begs for her job and says she'll do "ANYTHING" to keep it... take her up on it... then fire her anyway...THERE, SLIPPING MY ASS. I'll RULE THIS COMPANY WITH AN IRON FUCKING FIST GOD DAMNIT!!!!! . . . once again, you're not listening . . . I DO NOT DO THINGS LIKE THAT . . . I DO NOT TAKE ADVANTAGE OF WOMEN IN THE OFFICE PLACE, EVEN IF GIVEN THE CHANCE . . . . . I will fuck with you , I will be an asshole . . . . I will be the most cold, calculating machine that you can think of . . . One of the many beautiful offshoots of being able to kill my emotions on a moment's notice . . . I will belittle you . . I will work you harder than you ever thought you could be worked . . . . . . I will bear down on you till you scream . . . .. . . . I will bear down on you until your only wish is to have never seen my face . . . I will be your definition of TYRANT . . . . . . but no sex . . . . Succumbing to sex is like admitting that you lose . . . I will not violate that area . . . . . . . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeg Posted February 14 Report Share Posted February 14 all work and no play makes jack (errr mike) a dull boy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuturephunk Posted February 14 Author Report Share Posted February 14 . . . Dull? . . I think not . . . . . . . . . I got judged to be "warm-assertive" on the personality scale . . so that means that I'm usually loud, driven and colorful . . . . . . OH HOW THEY (my minions) ARE LEARNING THIS TODAY . . . . . . . they will feel my wrath . . . . . . . . . . . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeg Posted February 14 Report Share Posted February 14 I pitty your poor subordinates... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuturephunk Posted February 14 Author Report Share Posted February 14 Originally posted by joeg I pitty your poor subordinates... . . . PITY THEM? . . . . . . Laugh at them!! . .. . . . . They will all burn in the beautiful light that is my competance .... FUCK THEM . .. . . . .. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuturephunk Posted February 14 Author Report Share Posted February 14 . . . you will be delighted to know that I have intercepted all office deliveries and had them locked up until the conclusion of today's business . . AND I've reprimanded 2 employees who were wearing pink . . . . . .HUZZZAAAHHH!!! . . . the ONE DAY A YEAR I GET TO BE A COMPLETE ASSHOLE!!! . . . BWWAAAAHAAAAAHAAAAA . . . . . . . . . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuturephunk Posted February 14 Author Report Share Posted February 14 . . . COME ON PEOPLE . . . where are all my drippy sappy believers out there? . . where are all the wussy's who will tell me that everythings great in the land o fucking sunshine and that I shouldn't be mad on a day like this?. . .. . WELL??? . . . . yeah I thought so . . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scoob-e Posted February 14 Report Share Posted February 14 just do what that boss in office space did, that guy was very annoying Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeg Posted February 14 Report Share Posted February 14 YOU LOCKED UP THE PACKAGES, LOL, I'M LITERALLY LAUGHING OUT LOUD!!!!I think your going to get me fired, my coworkers are probalby wondering what the fuck is so funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuturephunk Posted February 14 Author Report Share Posted February 14 Originally posted by scoob-e just do what that boss in office space did, that guy was very annoying . . . too fucking passive . . I want my presence to be FELT . . PAINFULLY!!! . . . . . . . . . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goagirl63 Posted February 14 Report Share Posted February 14 What exactly is your position and who are you to even think about treating people like tThat?!!!!!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuturephunk Posted February 14 Author Report Share Posted February 14 Originally posted by goagirl63 What exactly is your position and who are you to even think about treating people like tThat?!!!!!!!!!!! . . . God . . and yes I can . . . tee hee hee . . . . . . . . . . . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tottallyoff Posted February 14 Report Share Posted February 14 I call my head trader a bitch.... :D:D:D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuturephunk Posted February 14 Author Report Share Posted February 14 Originally posted by tottallyoff I call my head trader a bitch.... :D:D:D . . THAT's the spirit, YOU GO MIKEY!!!. . . . . . . . . . :laughing: . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chrisbugg Posted February 14 Report Share Posted February 14 Be nice to your underlings. If you are nice to them maybe something nice will happen to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goagirl63 Posted February 14 Report Share Posted February 14 Simply--------Your an ASS!!!! You sound like my last boss, he enjoyed being an ass! I sued him for lots of money and won !!! Keep up those tactics and you will find yourself in the same position! Hehehehehe!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phuturephunk Posted February 14 Author Report Share Posted February 14 Originally posted by goagirl63 Simply--------Your an ASS!!!! You sound like my last boss, he enjoyed being an ass! I sued him for lots of money and won !!! Keep up those tactics and you will find yourself in the same position! Hehehehehe!!! . . . I think not . . I know the rule book like the back of my hand . . and like I said before . . sexual harrasment doesn't even exist to me meaning : I don't do it, I don't condone it , nor will I let it slide from other people . . . I've been quite prompt at getting jokers who do it fired before . . . . . now as far as being a tyrant is concerned . . . well . . there's nothing in the rule book that bans me from doing it . . . so this ONE day a year I will . . . it's the only day I actually act like an asshole . . the other 364 I'm a pretty laid back helpful guy . . . . . . read my posts in the archive . . you'll see . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.