SPYGIRL3 Posted March 16 Report Share Posted March 16 The Five Levels of DrinkingLEVEL 1: It's 11pm on a weeknight, you've had a few beers.Just as you get up to leave because you have to work the next day, one of your friends buys another round -- one of your *unemployed* friends. Here, at level one, you think to yourself, "Oh come on, this is silly, as long as I get seven hours of sleep, I'll be fine."LEVEL 2: It's midnight. You've had a few more beers.You've just spent 20 minutes arguing against the use of artificialturf. You get up to leave again, but at level two, a little devil appears on your shoulder. And now you're thinking, "Hey! I'm out with my friends! What am I working for anyway? These are the good times! Besides, as long as I get five hours of sleep, I'm cool."LEVEL 3: 1am. You've abandoned beer for tequila.You've just spent 20 minutes arguing FOR the use of artificial turf. And now you're thinking, "Our waitress is the most beautiful woman I've ever seen!" At level three, you love the world. On the way to the bathroom, you buy a drink for the stranger at the end of the bar just because you like his face. You get drinking fantasies (like, "Hey fellas, if we bought ourown bar, we could live together forever. We could do it. Tommy, you could cook."). But at level three, that devil is a little bit bigger... and he's buying. And you're thinking, "Oh, come on, come on now. As long as I get three hours of sleep... and a complete change of blood, I'm cool."LEVEL 4: 2am. And the devil is bartending.For last call, you ordered a bottle of rum and a Coke. You AREartificial turf! This time, on your way to the bathroom, you punch the stranger at the end of the bar just because you don't like his face! And now you're thinking, "Our busboy is the best looking man I've ever seen." You and your friends decide to leave, right after you get thrown out, and one of you knowsan afterhours bar. Here, at level four, you actually think to yourself, "Well... as long as I'm only going to get a few hours sleep anyway, I may as well stay up all night! Yeah! That'd be good for me. I don't mind going to that board meeting looking like Keith Richards. Yeah, I'll turn that around, makeit works for me. And besides, as long as I get 31 hours sleep tomorrow, I'm cool."LEVEL 5: 5am.After unsuccessfully trying to get your money back at the tattooparlor ("But I don't even know anybody named Simon!"), you and your friends wind up across the state line in a bar with guys who have been in prison as recently as... that morning. It's the kind of place where even the devil is saying, "Uh, I gotta turn in. I gotta be in Hell by nine." At this point, you're all drinking some kind of thick blue liquor, like something from a Klingon wedding. A waitress with fresh stitches comes over, and you think to yourself, "Someday I'm gonna marry that girl!"One of your friends stands up and screams, "WE'RE DRIVIN' TO VEGAS, BABY!!!!!"-- and passes out. You crawl outside for air, and then you hit the worst part of level 5----the sun. You weren't expecting that were you? You never do. You walk out of a bar in daylight, and you see people on their way to work or worse, jogging. And they look at you and they know. And they say, "Who's Simon?" Let's be honest, if you're 19 and you stay up all night, it's like a victory -- you've beat the night. But if you're over 30, then that sun is like God's flashlight. We all say the same prayer and then, "I swear, I will never do this againas long as I live!" And some of us have that little addition, "and this time, I mean it!" :blown: :blown: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
echostar Posted March 16 Report Share Posted March 16 so true.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SPYGIRL3 Posted March 16 Author Report Share Posted March 16 THe other night, my friend said let's go to AC, I got some time, I don't have to work till 9 am....Mind you it was 1 when he had this great .... It was too funny:laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misk Posted March 16 Report Share Posted March 16 that is ssooooo me it's not even funnY!!((minus the turf thing and wanting the waitress))......ESPECIALLY on friday's...since i must be at work at 7:45 on sat! ick!........like...i always say....why make the money if i am not gonna go out and have fun ....and the whole night i am thinking...ok..now i will get 5 hours..now 4 hours ..of sleep....((btw...last night i got 3 1/2)).......i think i am a raging alcoholic Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SPYGIRL3 Posted March 17 Author Report Share Posted March 17 Originally posted by misk that is ssooooo me it's not even funnY!!((minus the turf thing and wanting the waitress))......ESPECIALLY on friday's...since i must be at work at 7:45 on sat! ick!........like...i always say....why make the money if i am not gonna go out and have fun ....and the whole night i am thinking...ok..now i will get 5 hours..now 4 hours ..of sleep....((btw...last night i got 3 1/2)).......i think i am a raging alcoholic I have done many sleepless night, especially when I worked retail.... It was hell, try being nice to people who you wanna kill!!! What do you do that you have to work on Saturdays?I think I am a getting there. # of us went out Thursday, from 9 until 2, we hit 3 bars and spent a grand total of 60 bucks all night. We were all quite silly!!!!! Gotta love knowing the bartenders:tongue: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misk Posted March 17 Report Share Posted March 17 i'm a hairdresser.....sucks but.......the money is good!! yea....i had one of those friendly bartender nights fri....did a lil local bar hopping....just sucks the next day when i am still drunk and have to work on clients....and we all know...not everyone is pleasant to work with!! or like when i am hungover.....it always seems thats the day ALL the clients with annoying voices come in.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SPYGIRL3 Posted March 18 Author Report Share Posted March 18 Originally posted by misk just sucks the next day when i am still drunk and have to work on clients....and we all know...not everyone is pleasant to work with!! or like when i am hungover.....it always seems thats the day ALL the clients with annoying voices come in.... I have friend who is and feels the same way!!!!!! I hear your pains:blown: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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