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In ur life one day... out the next....

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A friend and i were talking the other day.... just lookin back at memories and shit.... and we thought of something....

everyone u meet... everyone u talk to... everyone u date... becomes a part of ur life... and helps develop u as a person. these people make up who u r... because certain situations with these people will help u to discover different things about urself... and its amazing... how someone can be a part of ur life for however long... and then, for whatever the reason might be, they just arent anymore. granted, people break up... people fight and certain circumstances make it difficult to remain in each other's lives... but we were just talkin about how sad it is sometimes... that someone who helps make u who u r... might eventually act like they dont even know who u r.... its just weird i guess, how things change. and i know things happen for a reason... and its hard sometimes to be friendly once something goes bad, but it just sucks i guess... when someone who spent time as a part of ur life, just acts like they dont even know u exist, and vice versa.

i know its life... but its weird right?

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Yeah, it's weird... I learned some valuable lessons this past year, people you expect to always be there for you can at any moment *poof* and vanish into thin air... it's sad, but people are sketchy like that... it forces you to seriously reevaluate who your real friends are, and sometimes you can't help but wonder if there is truly such a thing as a "real" friend. :(

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I've thought of this often myself, having gone through a good amount of losses of friends and loved ones for my 23 years here.

But the hardest part (also most important) is ACCEPTANCE of the loss and Realizing that something else will take that place of the absent individual.

I'm being hurt very much so as we speak by someone i spent 2 years with. I don't even think she knows what she's doing, but i have no choice but to move on. I can appreciate the memories and take so much that i have learned from being with her, but all good things must come to an end, and we move on to the next adventure.

But i also enjoy calling up someone i haven't spoken to in a while and saying what's up. Time heals most wounds...

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Indeed....peoples needs , desires, and ambitions sway in a chaotic pendelum. Im sure theres some art form masked away behind it all and yet most of the time when it comes to people that we thought were kindred...and now they are almost out of reach....we feel confused...and are left wanting.

Then again we took the steps to lead our lives this way and we can take the steps to make the necessary changes.

What I find amusing...through personal experience and from what I see in others is that when a relationship begins to falter

the first reaction is complete system shutdown...people back away from that type of drama...instead of charging into it..with raised flags proclaiming true intentions.

:flame:

Basicly...it can work if your willing to work for it....if not

well then you have plenty of servings of "what if?"

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Originally posted by gothzane

Basicly...it can work if your willing to work for it....if not

well then you have plenty of servings of "what if?"

SO TRUE!!!

On my side, im always willing to charge in, willing to make things work. However the other person in my saga is lazy and doesn't want to get caught up in too much. Very light, flaky type.

Im crisp and willing :)

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Everyone that you come in contact with in your life helps shape the person that you have come to be, with past relationships, both with friends and boy/girlfriends, its at times upsetting because all the time that you have spent with this individual, in the end a good majority of the time, you are no longer friends with this person. Just think about all the good times and yes, bad times also, and then think about how you are no longer friends with this person, it kinda makes you feel like all the time that you spent with this person, has gone away to nothing, you almost feel like you are in withdrawal. When you were with your boyfriend/girlfriend all the good times that you shared and common intrests, this is a good time between the two of you. When you break up and then come incontact after the break up, the two individuals act asthough they dont even know eachother, THIS I DONT UNDERSTAND. Why do people have to act this way twards eachother, maybe there are ill feelings still there, but time does heal most wounds. :(

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Originally posted by randall16

Everyone that you come in contact with in your life helps shape the person that you have come to be, with past relationships, both with friends and boy/girlfriends, its at times upsetting because all the time that you have spent with this individual, in the end a good majority of the time, you are no longer friends with this person. Just think about all the good times and yes, bad times also, and then think about how you are no longer friends with this person, it kinda makes you feel like all the time that you spent with this person, has gone away to nothing, you almost feel like you are in withdrawal. When you were with your boyfriend/girlfriend all the good times that you shared and common intrests, this is a good time between the two of you. When you break up and then come incontact after the break up, the two individuals act asthough they dont even know eachother, THIS I DONT UNDERSTAND. Why do people have to act this way twards eachother, maybe there are ill feelings still there, but time does heal most wounds. :(

yea i know... its not even like the time spent with that person was a WASTE.... it just sucks that even after being so close with someone.. u cant even be civil with one another after a while... even AFTER time has healed... u know?

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Originally posted by randall16

When you were with your boyfriend/girlfriend all the good times that you shared and common intrests, this is a good time between the two of you. When you break up and then come incontact after the break up, the two individuals act asthough they dont even know eachother, THIS I DONT UNDERSTAND. Why do people have to act this way twards eachother, maybe there are ill feelings still there, but time does heal most wounds. :(

It's because the feelings are either still there, or they are gone but still your shared past makes things awkward and uncomfortable.

Call me cold, but I have little to no interest in maintaining contact with most (all?) of my old flames.

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Originally posted by tastyt

It's because the feelings are either still there, or they are gone but still your shared past makes things awkward and uncomfortable.

Call me cold, but I have little to no interest in maintaining contact with most (all?) of my old flames.

:laugh: me either. i dont think we are cold, just realistic.

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Originally posted by tastyt

It's because the feelings are either still there, or they are gone but still your shared past makes things awkward and uncomfortable.

Call me cold, but I have little to no interest in maintaining contact with most (all?) of my old flames.

you're not cold.....some people just deal with things differently..

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:(ive had too many ppl in my life that i once cared about walk out on me. ive lost alot of ppl that i thought were true friends. and honestly im scared to let the ppl that are important to me now drift away. nothing means more to me than keeping my loved ones close to me. cuz i think right now i need them more than ever before

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Originally posted by gothzane

Im the opposite...I want everyone away in their own place where they belong....I want people to move on...to ascend.

:flame:

im the same way... i want people to be where they belong... but if they are a loved one, then of course ill want them close to me too... no one says that just b/c a person has to move on from a relationship they might have once had with u.. that means that they now cant be a part of ur life anymore... make sense? :confused:

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Originally posted by linabina

im the same way... i want people to be where they belong... but if they are a loved one, then of course ill want them close to me too... no one says that just b/c a person has to move on from a relationship they might have once had with u.. that means that they now cant be a part of ur life anymore... make sense? :confused:

Yes, it does :)

but say you were intimately involved with a person, and it was the right situation at the wrong time. Either one of them wasn't ready for a commitment, or u were both not set as individuals. You two both go your separate ways, but without much closure on the relationship. Is it possible to rekindle that again in the future (yeah im talking about me :rolleyes:

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No matter how a realtionship ends, good or bad, whether they were a lover of a friend, I learn from it. Everyone touches your life for a reason. Everyone comes into it for a reason. Even with the neagativer you have to find positive...........

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Originally posted by randall16

When you break up and then come incontact after the break up, the two individuals act asthough they dont even know eachother, THIS I DONT UNDERSTAND. Why do people have to act this way twards eachother, maybe there are ill feelings still there, but time does heal most wounds. :(

people deal with things diffferently. seeing the other person is a reminder of what was, and doesnt help in getting over it and moving on. it takes time to move on for some people.

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Originally posted by gmccookny

Yes, it does :)

but say you were intimately involved with a person, and it was the right situation at the wrong time. Either one of them wasn't ready for a commitment, or u were both not set as individuals. You two both go your separate ways, but without much closure on the relationship. Is it possible to rekindle that again in the future (yeah im talking about me :rolleyes:

of course u can rekindle... if u 2 meet again somewhere down the line and feelings still remain, then shit- go for urs!!! ;)

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Originally posted by bigpoppanils

people deal with things diffferently. seeing the other person is a reminder of what was, and doesnt help in getting over it and moving on. it takes time to move on for some people.

:unhappy:

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