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Destiny

Just friends??

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This has probably been posted before, however, I dont feel like doing a search for it:)

Can you be friends with your ex , while still having a boy/girl friend??

I still talk to a few of my ex's and if I had a boyfriend that asked me to stop talking to them, I would. However, there seems to be some debate among my friends about this topic.

Some seem to say that even if their bf/gf asked them to stop talking to their ex, they wouldnt...they see no reason to. I in a way, agree with them, that I can be friends with my ex's without anything happening. I've done it many times before. However, I also believe that if i had a boyfriend, the respect should come along with it, and cut ties with the ex's.

So what brought about this question....

My friends gf refuses to stop talking to her ex, shes saying that theres no danger to the relationship with her bf. He asked me for my advice, and I didnt know exactly what to tell him, because breaking up is not an option.

Any opinions??:tongue:

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it depends on how mature the two people are in the relationship. i had a good friend that i went to school with, we ended up dating for 6 months. i dumped him, now he refuses to call or talk to me, but he will talk and call all our mutual friends on a weekly basis (he's in europe now).

if the ex isn't mature enough to handle it, then forget it, you're better off without his friendship.

but if he can...make sure there are no other reasons other than friendship with him, maybe he's thinking to make a play for you again, or to get with one of your friends, or some other fucked up reason.

good luck.

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I think it all depends. My boyfriend was "best friends" with his ex when we met. He continued being friends with her until she told him one day she wanted to get back. She didnt know about me though (which concerned me but we were just in the beginning stage). I told him I couldnt tell him to stop being friends with her but I wasnt comfortable with the idea. He stopped talking to her though. He has also told me later on that he either had to pick her or me because he still had feelings for her and didnt know if that would stop anything with us from happening. So, I guess if he didnt still haev feelings for her, there wouldnt be any harm but he did what he had to do for himself.

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As long as neither one gets attached to each other again I don't see the problem....BUT talking to an ex can gradually bring back old feelings/emotions which can cause conflict among the new relationship.....Your friend shouldn't have to cut off her ex completely (if they are JUST friends) but keep the communication minimal...

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Originally posted by destiny779

This has probably been posted before, however, I dont feel like doing a search for it:)

Can you be friends with your ex , while still having a boy/girl friend??

I still talk to a few of my ex's and if I had a boyfriend that asked me to stop talking to them, I would. However, there seems to be some debate among my friends about this topic.

Some seem to say that even if their bf/gf asked them to stop talking to their ex, they wouldnt...they see no reason to. I in a way, agree with them, that I can be friends with my ex's without anything happening. I've done it many times before. However, I also believe that if i had a boyfriend, the respect should come along with it, and cut ties with the ex's.

So what brought about this question....

My friends gf refuses to stop talking to her ex, shes saying that theres no danger to the relationship with her bf. He asked me for my advice, and I didnt know exactly what to tell him, because breaking up is not an option.

Any opinions??:tongue:

I agree with you. I would respect my new b/f's opinion. I would stop talking to my ex for my new b/f and i have done it. I would also expect my b/f to not talk to his ex. I just think its unnecessary, you can never really "just be friends" with someone like that. I'm not saying there will always be feelings there, but they will never be a true friend. From experience, staying friends with an ex causes much unneeded drama in the new relationships, and I know i would rather have things good with b/f than having fights over someone who doesnt really matter anymore

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