housedog Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 Just a little warning to BE CAREFUL, and not stupid like I was! So my gay ass got busted for a pill this past Sunday Morning heading to theSound Factory S&M party. Before anyone freaks I got off with a Disorderly Conduct Violation, nocriminal record and just have to take a Drug Treatment Readiness program next week. Sadly my next courtdate is the June 30th, the Monday after pride....*sigh* Anywho, the skinny on the 26 hours spent in custody: My friend and I were walking down 46th street towards Sound Factory, me in S&Mgear and her dressed as a naughty nurse with a bright blue wig on....of course asking to getstared at! So we decided to take our pills before we got inside, since we didn't want to gothrough the searching. We stop half a block away from SF and make a joke about undercover cops (oh theforeshadowing! I see a guy stare at us (not unusual considering the outfits) and walk into thebuilding next to us. He had keys and all. So my friend unwraps the pills and hands me one and thenext thing I know, the guy from the building bum rushes her, flashes his badge and demand she handover what she has. Then 3 other undercovers materialize from the fucking thin air and are allover her. I freak out and drop my pill on the floor. The cuff her and then turn their attention on me, standing off to the side smoking a cigarette. They ask "So, what you got?" Me: "Nothing, I'm just smoking a cigarrete, no idea what you're talking about"(of course play dumb, what else was there to do?) They look around on the floor find the pill and then cuff me too. I had an open orange juice container, and they ask me if there is K in there. Ok a little aside, what a fucking stupid question....who the fuck puts K in g'damn orange juice? Shouldn't I have baked that shit first??? If he asked about G, then maybe, freaking idioticnarcs...know your damn drugs! He proceeds to spillout the juice...there goes breakfast! They ask if we have anything else, because we will be searched. I say no but amstashing half a gram of coke and 2 little bags of tina crumbs which i have hidden in a hiddenpocket in my leather shorts. They search out pockets and our bags, find my friends cuffs that werepart of her outfit and look all puzzled and then pull out my id. So now I have 4 undercover copslooking at my id, looking at me all puzzled and looking at my friend all puzzled over the cuffs: Officer 1 to Officer 2: "Check this shit out" hands id over...and then theyplay show and tell amongst each other. Officer 2: "So you lost a lot of weight huh?" Me: "yes" Them: "Wow, how much, you look great!" Me: "125, thanks" Them: "Dayuuumm!" ok, wtf, i'm sitting on 46th street in cuffs and rubber at 8 am in the morning,can we please fucking get this shit over with and get me in a car off the fuckin street andnot dicuss my weigth loss, there's a freaking time and a place, this was neither! Then the cops who have the paddy wagon come up and say " Club Kids huh?" Icould have clobbered her. "So what was going on in Sf?" Me: "S&M party, but i somehow didnt make it in" She was not amused. Anywho, took us to a long ass grey van with tinted windown where there wasanother poor poor soul in the back who had been busted before us. I'm freaking out at this point, not sure what I've been charged with....afelony, a misdemeanor, nothing? no idea....no one told me. But my friend and I decide no usefreaking out, cant solve anything we just have to deal with the situation at hand. So then we prettymuch start laughing at the whole situation, from the ridiculous outfits to the fact that we are goingto have to march into the general prison population in aforementioned outfits...oh this shitonly happens to us! The guy in the back started bitching....My cuffs are too tight, when the hellare we going to get out of this van, i wasnt smoking weed!!! officers: deal, sometime around noon, well your K'ed out! him: my shoulders hurt, 4 more hours???!?!?!?!?, but i got booked for weed, idont even fucking smoke weed, i hate that shit!! poor kid, fucked for weed, doesnt even do it! oh the irony.... Drive around for a couple of hours, time crawling by, fuck that...it had fuckinstopped. Then they pick up another juicer from SF and stick him next to me. This kids bugginthe fuck out. Sweating profusely, not really all with it. I ask him if hes alright...noresponse, then he finally speaks up and says he needs to water.... They first say..."This ain'tMcdonald's we dont do requests" but when they finally look at him, realize he really needs somewater. So at one point, there are 2 cops clawing their way through the van, one recuffing theguy in the back so he would shut the fuck up and and the other lady, taking off the guys jacketgetting him some water....oh the comotion on 34th street. The hot dog vendor next to us got anice little show! Then they turn to me and my friend..."What the hell's wrong with you, neitherof you have been complaining?" Me: "Well, acutally i'm in rubber, and the sweat is begininng to pool on theseat, could you unzip me?" Her: "what?!?!?!?? me: "uh, rubber?" her: "Oh, S&M, right...." proceeded to unzip me My friend: "Acutally could, you pull my skirt down, i'm a bit exposed, andbutton me???" oh its just got way to comical Cop: "what about the cuffs? oh, never mind S&M, you must be used to it" thenturns back around. WTF...must be used it???...at this point I turn to my friend and wonder whatthe hell they think of us, besided the fact that they think were are a couple....morons! The guy next to me (mark) is fidgeting and complaining the whole time and thelady cop says: "If I find anything in the van, I'm giving you another charge!" I'm thinking: "SCORE!!! YES!!" Drive around for a couple more hours and then pick us this poor fuck for havinga roach so fucking small you couldnt even see it. he had stepped 4 steps out of his apartmentbuilding, and them bam, royaly fucked by undercover. The finally take us to the precinct on 54th st. Park at the end of the theblock. Let me set the situation for you: Sunday the 28th, 12:30 in the afternoon, beautiful day, sunny, perfect 72degrees and everyone, their mom and their dog from Iowa are out and about in midtown and my office isfreaking 2 blocks down. Out steps my friend in a nurses outfit and a bight blue wig, looking like aprostitutes in cuffs. Next comes 4 men, 1 with K all over her nose, another one with coke all overhis nose, the poor bastard wiht the roach, and me in rubber. They fuckin chain us together and march us down the block into the precinct.... With Blake, Muffy and their dog snookums from Iowa watching as we marching inshackles. Ok of all the situations i have been in, that right there was the down rightmost embarrassing situation. Did they really need the damn chains???? They take us to a small holding cell, strip search us, take mugshots andfingerprints to process us to take us to central booking downtown. I was wearing bicep bands, and theofficer strip searching me askes "what are you trying to be wonder woman or something?" Cutthe damn comments i'm not in the damn mood! But at least he let me change into the tshirt in mybag, i was not looking forward to walking into a holding cell in central booking with othermen, wearing rubber.... The lady cop says to me and my friend: "You too have been our model prisoners, why cant everyone be like you?" Me: "Oh, thanks! I'll make sure to tell my mom that when I recount this story!" get fuckin real! Meanwhile, Mark goes to get finger printed, and Mike says to me: "Dude, that guy is totally stashing, he keeps stuffing baggies down the seat,and everytime I see him throw something down, I kick it back up, thats fucked up yo!" Me: "Really?!??!?!?" Mark comes back and mike goes to get printed and Mark says " You, that bro istrying to pin baggies on me, I'm not stashing man, I dont have any baggies!" Me: "Really?!?!?!!?! thats fucked up yo!" By the time we get out of the precinct its 4pm, they re-chain us so Blake,Muffy and Snookums can get a good look again and march us back down the block to the van and down tocentral booking, before which we were warned by our arresting officers...."dont mess with thewomen over there, they are a bunch of bitches" Thanks, i'll keep that in mind, while i twiddle mythumbs for 14 more hours! Oh what a mess central booking is: They search you again, take a mug again and take you to for a medicalquestionaire which goes along the lines of: Them: "Are you alerigic to anything" Them: "Do you take any medications?" Them: "Smoke?" Them: "Alcohol?" Them: "Drugs?" Me: "NO!" what the fuck do you think i'm freaking here for....we all answered no. What adumb fucking question....stupid government strikes again! *sigh* They take us to a holding cell, which has metal benches, and teal floors andwalls. Feed us stale bologne sandwiches but dont fret, you vegetarians, they have stale peanutbutter (no jelly) sandwiches for you....all served with koolaid!! it was just like a picnick! woo hoo. and a steel toilet with a divider which cut off mid thigh...thanks for the cover guys, nono really, you shouldnt have! Sit around for a couple of hours, try to sleep with my jacket balled up as mypillow, bed, best friend?? Then they move us to another cell, this time smaller, with more people...fewmore hours there....then the tell us...oh the judge went home, you are stuck here for thenight. I almost lost my shit right then and there. i was going insane, stir crazy i tell you.those of you who know me, know i cant sit in one place for too long...i fidget, get bored needmore stimulation. Teal walls, 26 inmates, and steel benchs DO NOT classify as stimulation. Then the cops get another bright idea, to move us to another holding cell, thistime even smaller....oh geez, now only half of us can lay down, the rest get to stand andglare at the snore-ers wondering what we can do to get them to stop fucking snoring....Sometime around 3 am they give us breakfast....cereal...called Complete...now with 8 more vitaminsand minerals than before....woo hoo! BY this time i'm so bored i'm almost in tears. But toamuse myself, i read every single thing on the milk carton and cereal box, memorizing how to spellthe really hard ingredients. making sure to quiz myself later. Then with just enough to dozeoff into sleepy land, they bust in, wake us all up and come mop the floor with this industrialshit which would cause an elephant to pass out from asphyxiation. So, we are cranky, bored,irritable, half stoned, since people have smoking up like its their home, half high from the inhalantsthey slopped on the floor, and not able to sleep on the damn floor cause its wet and making us allnauseated....oh the fun! Finally at 8 am I see my lawyer....the case has been brought down to theviolation....just sign up for the class and i'm scott free. Get the hell out of court at 10 am monday morning. Relishing in my freedom andlaughing my ass off, when reunited with my friend, at the past 26 hours that crawled by slowerthan my grandma trying to cross an 8 lane highway. The freedom felt a bit wierd...i was wigginout when i left the court room and realized that no one was following me or controling my everymove. Cant imagine what it feels like after a longer incarceration. Although the converstationsof "so whatcya in for??" "fuckin bloomberg" were kinda amusing. But never again! Lessons learned: 1. Do your shit at home! in private 2. Its easier to get shit into central booking than it is to exit. I mean icould have walked into county with bags of shit and no one would have known. 3. Act nice to cops....they processed my friend and I first...since we were soquiet 4. Narcs have no idea what the fuck the drugs they are dealing with are 5. BE CAREFUL all's well that ends well! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rdancer Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 im glad everything worked out for the better, even though it seemed to be going downhill from the moment you were caught....I hope you learned this life lesson well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ecpolo521 Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 Thats one hell of a story I must say. Good thing charges were lowered. Everybody, BE SAFE AND BE CAREFUL. F*$k the cops, F*$k Bloomberg! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maximman Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 nice entry. kept me interested the whole time... at least i'll know what to expect if i ever get arrested. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jaysea Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 hahahahahahahahahahathat was fucking classic, Great Story, it COULD OF BEEN ALOT WORSE, Atleast u werent doing runWay in your cell,And did anyone else find this kinda exotic?Tell the truth, u liked being stripped out of your rubber HUH?All Serious n shit> Bummer, happy your ok tho,me< Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hotcheme Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 what a story.... you had me laughing at points. glad you are ok now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sexxyme Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 Great story heheGlad you and your friend are ok Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hotcheme Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 wake us all up and come mop the floor with this industrial shit which would cause an elephant to pass out from asphyxiation i think that is my favorite part of the whole thing... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waaaaa Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 hahaha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twilo Beauty Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 LOLLLOLLLLOLKDude, I just told everyone in my office what happened to you! They are all laughing their asses off! LOLLLLLLOLThanks for the story. Glad things went rather decent for you. -iliana :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
edwardt Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 DAMN!!!!!!!!! Sorry to hear that.. I was in SI booking ones and it wasn't pretty.. I can only imagine how you felt And what you said about EXIT it's true too.. Last week we went with my friends not only that I was asked to take my shoes off the guy was massaging my balls for 5 min.. I was like would you like me to unzip so you can do a better job Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
housedog Posted May 2 Author Report Share Posted May 2 To Let everyone know, This happen to 2 friends of mine, not me. I just recieved the email from him, and thought you would all enjoy it.Like he said Watch out and be careful. Everytime I go to Vinyl for Danny, I smoke an L to the head, right outside my car. I got to change it up and do something different. There is NO WAY in HELL I want to get caught smoking in public and go thru this shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ecua626 Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 Originally posted by edwardt DAMN!!!!!!!!! Sorry to hear that.. I was in SI booking ones and it wasn't pretty.. I can only imagine how you felt And what you said about EXIT it's true too.. Last week we went with my friends not only that I was asked to take my shoes off the guy was massaging my balls for 5 min.. I was like would you like me to unzip so you can do a better job stop lying u wanted him to touch u in all sorts of ways he he:tongue: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
edwardt Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 Originally posted by ecua626 stop lying u wanted him to touch u in all sorts of ways he he:tongue: LMAO!!! I KICK YOU!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ecua626 Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 Originally posted by edwardt LMAO!!! I KICK YOU!!! jew kicked my dog?btw that story had me crackin up...... at least u laughed about it?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
edwardt Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 Originally posted by ecua626 jew kicked my dog?btw that story had me crackin up...... at least u laughed about it?? NO NO NO it was u who kick my dog! no not really, cause i know how that kid felt and trust me it aint funny when you in his shoes! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beverage10 Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 Gee I wonder who this was Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
housedog Posted May 2 Author Report Share Posted May 2 This is the craziest thing I have heard. I feel so bad for them. I am glad it all turned out ok. But those 26 hours must been very LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGOriginally posted by Beverage10 Gee I wonder who this was Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
squirt111 Posted May 2 Report Share Posted May 2 thats a sick story... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris817 Posted May 3 Report Share Posted May 3 At least you did not take anything before being busted.I could not imagine being arrested trippin balls!!I would bug the fuck out Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djmikedr Posted May 3 Report Share Posted May 3 wow. good reading!I have a similar story, dont really want to share it publically tho - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nSyNcBaBy Posted May 3 Report Share Posted May 3 Officer 1 to Officer 2: "Check this shit out" hands id over...and then theyplay show and tellamongst each other.Officer 2: "So you lost a lot of weight huh?" Me: "yes"Them: "Wow, how much, you look great!"Me: "125, thanks"Them: "Dayuuumm!"ok, wtf, i'm sitting on 46th street in cuffs and rubber at 8 am in the morning,can we pleasefucking get this shit over with and get me in a car off the fuckin street and not dicuss my weigth lossLOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ecua626 Posted May 3 Report Share Posted May 3 Originally posted by squirt111 thats a sick story... sicker than the one of me and u .................ummm i wont get there...he he lol jk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weed247 Posted May 3 Report Share Posted May 3 THAT STORY WAS GREAT.IT WAS SO DAM FUNNY.I DIDNT KNOW ,IT WAS THAT HARSH.THANKS FOR THE INTERESTING THREAD:laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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