need advice

[FlipsSOE]

alright. i'm going out with this girl, been 1 month and 3 days now. we have not had sex yet, and although it's not that big of deal to me, i believe it's from the info i have told her. she's been with only one guy in her life who she'd been with for 5 years. the night we first met, i was drunk and didn't tell her an exact number of women i had slept with except to tell her it was between 10 and 20. now she always makes fun of me for this. kind of in a degrading way, like omg i can't believe you sort of tone. i really like this girl a lot, and although she knows i have no std's nor any kids etc, lol. i get the feeling in a way shes turned off by my number. how do i make her feel at ease and prove to her that i have changed, and that i am willing to wait as long as it takes for her. this girl is smart, has a good, job, has her head on straight, pretty, sweet, innocent, never done drugs, doesn't go clubbing/ drinking. i don't wanna ruin this, but would hate to think that i might eventually ruin it by her disgust with me. what do i do??

[koky]

no clubbing ?? no drugs ?? DUMP HER NOW !!!

:D J/K ... ITS A TOUGH SITUATION BRO ... BUT IF I WERE YOU ID JUST CONFRONT HER WITH IT AND ASK HER WHATS UP ? SHE OBVIOUSLY LIKES YOU IF SHE IS STILL WITH YOU ... KNOW WHAT IM SAYIN ?

[youarehot99]

I wouldnt take advice from anyone who likes to stare at someone's taint...

[darlok]

FlipsSOE, your da man!! Try tellin her ur very religious... It's a great tactic when it comes to her parents. Or just tell her straight up that your got really tired of all the BS that was out there.

[weyes]

Originally posted by koky

... ITS A TOUGH SITUATION BRO ... BUT IF I WERE YOU ID JUST CONFRONT HER WITH IT AND ASK HER WHATS UP ? SHE OBVIOUSLY LIKES YOU IF SHE IS STILL WITH YOU ... KNOW WHAT IM SAYIN ?

nicely put, koky.

where did you meet her, if you were drunk and she doesn't drink? you don't have to answer that, but it just struck me as odd.

anyway, communication is where it's at. you won't know what's going on in her head unless ya ask .

[tastey]

Originally posted by FlipsSOE

alright. i'm going out with this girl, been 1 month and 3 days now. we have not had sex yet

there you have you answer.

give her a good fucking and a few orgasms, and let her mind do the rest of hallucinating you into her perfect love.

what the fuck is it that people date over 1 month without fucking?? that´s just wasting your time. i thought you are on your search for your perfect partner (aren´t we all?), how can you say you´re combatible when you don´t even know yet if you´re combatible SEXUALLY?? what happens when she SUCKS in bed... when she´s a PRUDE... light out, only missionary style old plain fucking once a week... a cold fish... would you still have the feelings for her you have now?? i bet you not

also, what strikes me is that you come from a place of desperation, which will in the end ALWAYS fuck you up.

i mean seriously, i would have dumped a girl long ago if she´d give me any sort of shit about my past or something. sorry i´m not looking for that. you should have told her to leave right there, and i bet you 100$ she´d have come back apologizing and shit, now knowing that you are a MAN that she can´t do anything she wants to.

YOU MUST ALWAYS BE READY TO LEAVE AT ANY POINT.

i mean you LET HER be disrespectful to you... you LET HER walk over you with NO CONSEQUENCES... AND you stick around... what does that say about you? that you think you don´t deserve respect and that you come from a place of extreme desperation... what will that eventually mean for you? that you´ll get dumped...

i see the same pattern over and over and over again with soooo many guys i know and don´t know... it´s saddening...

LAY DOWN THE FUCKING LAW.

women will absolutely without exception TEST you for your dominance and confidence SEVERAL TIMES and they will NEVER stop... they HAVE too... there are so many potential partners for them they HAVE to test men to weed out the weak... accept that fact and learn to see it...

you failed sooo many tests with this one... the next time... just CALL HER ON HER SHIT. you´ll see the difference in how she looks at you... "aha! there is his boundary! maybe there is REALLY a MAN in there"... however, it is probably too late already... one month of weakness is IME waaaaaaaay to long to NOW lay down the law... she probably has already lost all the respect and attraction she had to you.

i mean, what would you want with her anyway?? she doesn´t share many of the things you do for fun (clubbing, going out, drinking, drugs)... come on, what do you want with her?? sitting at home watching movies with a girl that doesn´t share your hobbies... and that you don´t even FUCK??? this just shows again your desperation... have fuckin STANDARDS man...

peace out.

[FlipsSOE]

Originally posted by tastey

there you have you answer.

give her a good fucking and a few orgasms, and let her mind do the rest of hallucinating you into her perfect love.

what the fuck is it that people date over 1 month without fucking?? that´s just wasting your time. i thought you are on your search for your perfect partner (aren´t we all?), how can you say you´re combatible when you don´t even know yet if you´re combatible SEXUALLY?? what happens when she SUCKS in bed... when she´s a PRUDE... light out, only missionary style old plain fucking once a week... a cold fish... would you still have the feelings for her you have now?? i bet you not

also, what strikes me is that you come from a place of desperation, which will in the end ALWAYS fuck you up.

i mean seriously, i would have dumped a girl long ago if she´d give me any sort of shit about my past or something. sorry i´m not looking for that. you should have told her to leave right there, and i bet you 100$ she´d have come back apologizing and shit, now knowing that you are a MAN that she can´t do anything she wants to.

YOU MUST ALWAYS BE READY TO LEAVE AT ANY POINT.

i mean you LET HER be disrespectful to you... you LET HER walk over you with NO CONSEQUENCES... AND you stick around... what does that say about you? that you think you don´t deserve respect and that you come from a place of extreme desperation... what will that eventually mean for you? that you´ll get dumped...

i see the same pattern over and over and over again with soooo many guys i know and don´t know... it´s saddening...

LAY DOWN THE FUCKING LAW.

women will absolutely without exception TEST you for your dominance and confidence SEVERAL TIMES and they will NEVER stop... they HAVE too... there are so many potential partners for them they HAVE to test men to weed out the weak... accept that fact and learn to see it...

you failed sooo many tests with this one... the next time... just CALL HER ON HER SHIT. you´ll see the difference in how she looks at you... "aha! there is his boundary! maybe there is REALLY a MAN in there"... however, it is probably too late already... one month of weakness is IME waaaaaaaay to long to NOW lay down the law... she probably has already lost all the respect and attraction she had to you.

i mean, what would you want with her anyway?? she doesn´t share many of the things you do for fun (clubbing, going out, drinking, drugs)... come on, what do you want with her?? sitting at home watching movies with a girl that doesn´t share your hobbies... and that you don´t even FUCK??? this just shows again your desperation... have fuckin STANDARDS man...

peace out.

i hear what ur saying, and thanks everyone for the advice, but it's just this girl is a very good girl. we knew each other in hs, and even hung out a bit then. so almost 2 months ago, i was at a local bar and we spotted each other out. she was just basically playing chaffeour for her friend who is about to get married soon and going through a tough time accepting it, so drinks quite heavily all of a sudden (totally diff story). so anyway, thing about her is she's a good girl. like a REALLY GOOD GIRL. i'll admit, i have never met anyone like her, and the fact that she won't just have sex with me makes me have a whole lot of respect for her. i've never met a girl who i've had this much difficulty with as far as having sex with. but again, i guess its the kind of girls i'd been used to meeting. club girls with drug problems and whole slew of other issues. this girl is diff, she was never into that, doesn't know that lifetsyle, and truth be told i completely hate that lifestyle(although i was part of it several years back) but i just turned 24, getting my career jumpstarted, grad school etc. i wanna be tied down to a wholesome girl that i can actually bring to my parents house, lol. someone who i may have a future with. she tells me shes been with one dude and i believe her. i'll admit, she is a PRUDE. but it doesn't bother me; my only problem is, i wanna make her understand that although i've had a few more sexual partners than her, she shouldn't feel pressured into hurrying into it with me. and that what i did before is no refelection of who i am now.

ps tastey- i don't do drugs, go clubbing, go out- so yea, we do have common interests, and in that a large attraction lies. and trust me- i could show u e-mails she sends me at work(like everyday) telling me how much she likes me, thinks about me, misses me etc.

i'm confused.

[lollie60]

why don't both of you try drinking some GHB and themake love to her anus ?

Both of you guys are uptight !

[nSyNcBaBy]

Originally posted by tastey

there you have you answer.

give her a good fucking and a few orgasms, and let her mind do the rest of hallucinating you into her perfect love.

what the fuck is it that people date over 1 month without fucking?? that´s just wasting your time. i thought you are on your search for your perfect partner (aren´t we all?), how can you say you´re combatible when you don´t even know yet if you´re combatible SEXUALLY?? what happens when she SUCKS in bed... when she´s a PRUDE... light out, only missionary style old plain fucking once a week... a cold fish... would you still have the feelings for her you have now?? i bet you not

also, what strikes me is that you come from a place of desperation, which will in the end ALWAYS fuck you up.

i mean seriously, i would have dumped a girl long ago if she´d give me any sort of shit about my past or something. sorry i´m not looking for that. you should have told her to leave right there, and i bet you 100$ she´d have come back apologizing and shit, now knowing that you are a MAN that she can´t do anything she wants to.

YOU MUST ALWAYS BE READY TO LEAVE AT ANY POINT.

i mean you LET HER be disrespectful to you... you LET HER walk over you with NO CONSEQUENCES... AND you stick around... what does that say about you? that you think you don´t deserve respect and that you come from a place of extreme desperation... what will that eventually mean for you? that you´ll get dumped...

i see the same pattern over and over and over again with soooo many guys i know and don´t know... it´s saddening...

LAY DOWN THE FUCKING LAW.

women will absolutely without exception TEST you for your dominance and confidence SEVERAL TIMES and they will NEVER stop... they HAVE too... there are so many potential partners for them they HAVE to test men to weed out the weak... accept that fact and learn to see it...

you failed sooo many tests with this one... the next time... just CALL HER ON HER SHIT. you´ll see the difference in how she looks at you... "aha! there is his boundary! maybe there is REALLY a MAN in there"... however, it is probably too late already... one month of weakness is IME waaaaaaaay to long to NOW lay down the law... she probably has already lost all the respect and attraction she had to you.

i mean, what would you want with her anyway?? she doesn´t share many of the things you do for fun (clubbing, going out, drinking, drugs)... come on, what do you want with her?? sitting at home watching movies with a girl that doesn´t share your hobbies... and that you don´t even FUCK??? this just shows again your desperation... have fuckin STANDARDS man...

peace out.

ur telling him to have standards?? so if u fuck a girl on the 1st date tastey is that enough to be like okay ill keep seeing her? then realize that shes a complete moron with no values and no education etc.? how does that make any sense? sex can wait sweetheart. there are a lot more important things to learn about a person before finding out how they are in bed. much more important things that will determine quality and longevity of the relationship. if u wait a while to have sex and its not the best, u can work on that. but there are things about a person's character and their personality that cannot be changed. so get ur prioritie straight and get urself some standards before u go giving this advice to someone who obviously cares about this girl for who she IS not how she fucks.

but hey- thats ur perogative to be like that.

p.s. drugs and clubbing will eventually end... therefore a partner with a good job, someone who is clean, straight edge yet a great funloving person is a great thing to have. at least a girl like this will have something to offer him later on in life.

[nSyNcBaBy]

Originally posted by FlipsSOE

i hear what ur saying, and thanks everyone for the advice, but it's just this girl is a very good girl. we knew each other in hs, and even hung out a bit then. so almost 2 months ago, i was at a local bar and we spotted each other out. she was just basically playing chaffeour for her friend who is about to get married soon and going through a tough time accepting it, so drinks quite heavily all of a sudden (totally diff story). so anyway, thing about her is she's a good girl. like a REALLY GOOD GIRL. i'll admit, i have never met anyone like her, and the fact that she won't just have sex with me makes me have a whole lot of respect for her. i've never met a girl who i've had this much difficulty with as far as having sex with. but again, i guess its the kind of girls i'd been used to meeting. club girls with drug problems and whole slew of other issues. this girl is diff, she was never into that, doesn't know that lifetsyle, and truth be told i completely hate that lifestyle(although i was part of it several years back) but i just turned 24, getting my career jumpstarted, grad school etc. i wanna be tied down to a wholesome girl that i can actually bring to my parents house, lol. someone who i may have a future with. she tells me shes been with one dude and i believe her. i'll admit, she is a PRUDE. but it doesn't bother me; my only problem is, i wanna make her understand that although i've had a few more sexual partners than her, she shouldn't feel pressured into hurrying into it with me. and that what i did before is no refelection of who i am now.

ps tastey- i don't do drugs, go clubbing, go out- so yea, we do have common interests, and in that a large attraction lies. and trust me- i could show u e-mails she sends me at work(like everyday) telling me how much she likes me, thinks about me, misses me etc.

i'm confused.

u just need to give her time to get to know u more... a lot of people judge others based on sexual history... dont talk about it... dont bring it up and if/when she brings it up... deal with it in such a way that will let her know that u dont appreciate the comments... etc... the fact that she is the way she is doesnt bother u and u respect that and still want to be with her says a lot about u... by what u say, i gather that shes very different from u... that said, u both need to get to know each other. but more importantly, she needs time to learn things about u that arent related to how many partners uve slept with. once she feels comfortable with u in all these other ways and accepts them, she will probably start to open up to u more sexually.

good luck

[tastey]

have to make the answers short, have to prepare skiing trip over the weekend

lina: sex is a very good indicator. often we men confuse our lust for a woman (or the challenge she poses *hint flip*) with love. having sex early will show you (and her) right away if you just wanted to fuck her brains out, or if you actually like her and also like to hang with her without the sex. not to get her to bed, but to get to know her. pillow talk serves as one of the most honest, intense and deep convos IME... also, it´s not like sex isn´t a fun and enjoyable thing for both partners

flip:

try this. it just might help to resurrect a moribund relationship with a girl. have used this before to devastating effect. it sounds very loserish at first blush, but hear me out. notice the difference between these two paragraphs (which i just made up and are cheesy, but it's just to illustrate what i mean) :

loser: i think about you day and night. you are so beautiful and i adore you. i can't wait to see you again.

womanizer: i think about you day and night. you are so beautiful and i adore you. but now i must go. you have touched me on a very deep level and it is more than i can bear. i am helpless before other women and i will only hurt you and myself. i can't see you anymore.

say the first phrase to a girl and she thinks "ha ha, i have a yappy new lapdog. buy me dinner!" zero challenge, she has already won.

say the second phrase and it throws her into a whirlwind of emotions. her whole world becomes the cover of a romance novel. her nurturing instinct kicks into high gear (after all, you are a victim of your desires and she must save you). she knows she is about to lose you. and she senses that you are about to run to the arms of ten other women for comfort.

it is very powerful. but the key is that she has to know that you really mean it. it has to be believable. you are *really* not going to see her anymore. and you should believe it too. after all, it was going cold already anyway and she was probably going to LJBF you.

and this is important - say it and then split. get the hell out of dodge. what i have found is that in a lot of cases, she will become obsessed with you. you will be bombarded with emails and phone calls from her. it is almost impossible for her to resist this challenge.

she almost certainly will try to coax you back. but only if you do this move while your rapport is still fairly strong and things are still going reasonably well between you two when you ditch her.

and when she contacts you, you must remain congruent and never let her feel she has you. from this point on. and the beauty is that you *can* go back to seeing her, but now you are the one with value. you are the prize. and you are the one that appears ready to leave at any moment. she WILL work to keep you.

and you have established the fact that you see other women and you can't help it. and she can't complain about this because you told her the way you are and that she might get hurt. but she still wants you anyway.

beautiful isn´t it?

[trueqwest]

Originally posted by tastey

have to make the answers short, have to prepare skiing trip over the weekend

lina: sex is a very good indicator. often we men confuse our lust for a woman (or the challenge she poses *hint flip*) with love. having sex early will show you (and her) right away if you just wanted to fuck her brains out, or if you actually like her and also like to hang with her without the sex. not to get her to bed, but to get to know her. pillow talk serves as one of the most honest, intense and deep convos IME... also, it´s not like sex isn´t a fun and enjoyable thing for both partners

flip:

try this. it just might help to resurrect a moribund relationship with a girl. have used this before to devastating effect. it sounds very loserish at first blush, but hear me out. notice the difference between these two paragraphs (which i just made up and are cheesy, but it's just to illustrate what i mean) :

loser: i think about you day and night. you are so beautiful and i adore you. i can't wait to see you again.

womanizer: i think about you day and night. you are so beautiful and i adore you. but now i must go. you have touched me on a very deep level and it is more than i can bear. i am helpless before other women and i will only hurt you and myself. i can't see you anymore.

say the first phrase to a girl and she thinks "ha ha, i have a yappy new lapdog. buy me dinner!" zero challenge, she has already won.

say the second phrase and it throws her into a whirlwind of emotions. her whole world becomes the cover of a romance novel. her nurturing instinct kicks into high gear (after all, you are a victim of your desires and she must save you). she knows she is about to lose you. and she senses that you are about to run to the arms of ten other women for comfort.

it is very powerful. but the key is that she has to know that you really mean it. it has to be believable. you are *really* not going to see her anymore. and you should believe it too. after all, it was going cold already anyway and she was probably going to LJBF you.

and this is important - say it and then split. get the hell out of dodge. what i have found is that in a lot of cases, she will become obsessed with you. you will be bombarded with emails and phone calls from her. it is almost impossible for her to resist this challenge.

she almost certainly will try to coax you back. but only if you do this move while your rapport is still fairly strong and things are still going reasonably well between you two when you ditch her.

and when she contacts you, you must remain congruent and never let her feel she has you. from this point on. and the beauty is that you *can* go back to seeing her, but now you are the one with value. you are the prize. and you are the one that appears ready to leave at any moment. she WILL work to keep you.

and you have established the fact that you see other women and you can't help it. and she can't complain about this because you told her the way you are and that she might get hurt. but she still wants you anyway.

beautiful isn´t it?

These are short answers, Tastey? Too much German ale, dude. Sober up next time:tongue:

[tastey]

Originally posted by trueqwest

These are short answers, Tastey? Too much German ale, dude. Sober up next time:tongue:

yeah fuck that... now i´m almost late

peace out

[tranzwhore]

flip the script on her. tell her u like her so much, u don't want to rush into sex. she'll eat it up & u'll make love by sun. nite. oh yeah, & buy her a vibrator. u'll be married by next year!

[koky]

Originally posted by tranzwhore

flip the script on her. tell her u like her so much, u don't want to rush into sex. she'll eat it up & u'll make love by sun. nite. oh yeah, & buy her a vibrator. u'll be married by next year!

:laugh: eddie sure knows his shit !! :laugh:

[mursa]

... get her to know you better and with time her (first) impression of you will eventually change .