georgym Posted July 19 Report Share Posted July 19 Would it be possible to maintain a relationship with someone while at the same time dating people.Here's the situation. You're still a young guy or girl. You've been with this person for a long time, but when you go out you're still tempted to talk to other guys/girls and leave fate in the hands of whatever may happen.You really like your better half and don't want to lose them. So you propose this idea. You agree with your better half NOT to sleep with anyone, and the most you can do is kiss/make out. you can go out on dates with other people, but it can never get to the serious part. And if it does start getting serious, you tell your better half about it.Would you do this or not? Would it work? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
murrrr Posted July 19 Report Share Posted July 19 i wouldnt do it. if the person is feeling like this then this means that he or she isn't ready for a relationship and doesn't really care about the other person who they are w/......i dont see how if u care for someone u want to date other people and make out w/ them but no sex involved, this just doesnt make sense to meif u feel like dating other people then that person should just be single and mingle..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muzikchick Posted July 19 Report Share Posted July 19 i dunno, i could never do the 2 + thing, at once. most people i have noticed just cheat....that means it's just not that serious on the girls part. on the male part...men are just dogs, it's a biological thing.excuse me, just something i read over the weekend that sickened me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muzikchick Posted July 19 Report Share Posted July 19 i dunno, i could never do the 2 + thing, at once. most people i have noticed just cheat....that means it's just not that serious on the girls part. on the male part...men are just dogs, it's a biological thing.excuse me, just something i read over the weekend that sickened me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muzikchick Posted July 19 Report Share Posted July 19 i dunno, i could never do the 2 + thing, at once. most people i have noticed just cheat....that means it's just not that serious on the girls part. on the male part...men are just dogs, it's a biological thing.excuse me, just something i read over the weekend that sickened me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muzikchick Posted July 19 Report Share Posted July 19 i dunno, i could never do the 2 + thing, at once. most people i have noticed just cheat....that means it's just not that serious on the girls part. on the male part...men are just dogs, it's a biological thing.excuse me, just something i read over the weekend that sickened me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
georgym Posted July 19 Author Report Share Posted July 19 Well, i would obviously tell her before i do anything. Im not gonna just start going out with chicks while im with her. What im getting at is if there's a way to be with one person (i.e. she'll be my number 1) but still just casually date other girls.Im only a dog in bed Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muzikchick Posted July 19 Report Share Posted July 19 that's funny....i've been called a cat. (giggles) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrismakk69 Posted July 19 Report Share Posted July 19 yeah that would never work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blondboheme Posted July 19 Report Share Posted July 19 i couldn't ever be in a relationship like that b/c trust is a very important issue to me, if i'm gonna give myself to someone i have to know they don't want to be with anyone but me (it's ok to find someone else attractive, but once you start touching them it crosses the line). plus, to me kissing is a very special and intimate thing (not all the time, but when i am in a relationship) and i don't want my man to come home and try to kiss me after swapping spit with some nasty ho!!!!!!!!!!! ya have to make up yer mind, ya can't have yer cake and eat it too Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kfitz73 Posted July 19 Report Share Posted July 19 I think it's ok to casually date more than one person at the same time if you're not seriously involved with anyone. But if you already have a serious relationship going then this would never fly... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fliptoniaaa Posted July 19 Report Share Posted July 19 that will never happen.....that was a very guy thing to say....nothing is impossible..anything can be dont between 2 people who come to an agreement....but 99% of woman would never go for anything like this!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lafemcaliente Posted July 19 Report Share Posted July 19 if you even have the urge to want to talk to, see, or hook up with other people, then it means that you arent really serious or in love with your significant other. of course you dont want to lose them completely, especially if they have been in your life for a long time, but its just because you are comfortable and dont wanna lose that sense of always 'having someone' to fall back on.if you wanted to pursue other options, you should let them know so that they arent being strung along. it isnt fair to either of you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nSyNcBaBy Posted July 20 Report Share Posted July 20 Would it be possible to maintain a relationship with someone while at the same time dating people.Here's the situation. You're still a young guy or girl. You've been with this person for a long time, but when you go out you're still tempted to talk to other guys/girls and leave fate in the hands of whatever may happen.You really like your better half and don't want to lose them. So you propose this idea. You agree with your better half NOT to sleep with anyone, and the most you can do is kiss/make out. you can go out on dates with other people, but it can never get to the serious part. And if it does start getting serious, you tell your better half about it.Would you do this or not? Would it work?no and no. if u care enough about urself and the other person, u have to choose. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muzikchick Posted July 20 Report Share Posted July 20 yup, i agree with most this stuff. but, reality says most cheat....to me this is an insecurity thing...u want somethign stuck to you and fear being alone, yet you aren't totally content with what you got. stringing people along is a person who is insecure, no one wants someone like that anyway, certainly not me.....then again...i have chosen to stay single for really long time. need someone a little more worldly and culturally open than what you find out there. or conversations just goes so far. dating more than one -- unserious, works. having a #1 and then some, would not work for me.ta-ta childrenz. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blondboheme Posted July 20 Report Share Posted July 20 yup, i agree with most this stuff. but, reality says most cheat....to me this is an insecurity thing...u want somethign stuck to you and fear being alone, yet you aren't totally content with what you got. stringing people along is a person who is insecure, no one wants someone like that anyway, certainly not me.....then again...i have chosen to stay single for really long time. need someone a little more worldly and culturally open than what you find out there. or conversations just goes so far. dating more than one -- unserious, works. having a #1 and then some, would not work for me.ta-ta childrenz. wow that made sense Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
candylicious Posted July 20 Report Share Posted July 20 This does not work. I dont think its right to have someone on the side while seeing a guy. You are just leading yourself and them on. You are either with your sig other or you are not. There is no in between. I thought about doing something like this but in the end I realized its not right. Someone always gets hurt and why cause anyone pain. If you want to see other people then you should break up. Go your seperate ways. Or think about why you want to see other people. Maybe your relationship is lacking i something. If you guys can figure out what is wrong then maybe up can work on it and stay together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
damelo Posted July 20 Report Share Posted July 20 I think that I know what the guy is saying. He loves the chick, she's perfect, and he knows that they will be great together. However, he still feels like he has wild oats to sow, and he still wants the thrill of the chase that we all know so well. So... are you girls saying that you can only be in a serious relationship once you've gotten rid of all your desires to play the field? Is it necessary for your significant other to take away your desire to ever be with anyone else? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lafemcaliente Posted July 20 Report Share Posted July 20 So... are you girls saying that you can only be in a serious relationship once you've gotten rid of all your desires to play the field? Is it necessary for your significant other to take away your desire to ever be with anyone else?i understand where you're coming from, but the thing of it is... you love her, you want to be with her, but you wanna 'do ur thing' too? well, how would you feel if SHE wanted to be with you, but 'go play the field' and keep you around during the process? you gotta look at it through the other perspective.and on a more personal note, i was with a guy for almost 3 years. he was great to me, we were great together, but i was his first girlfriend and he was away for college. so we broke up, not because anything was wrong, but because thats what he needed. so now we are great friends, and he insinuates that he wants to get back together all the time, but unfortunately that part of me that loved him in the romantic sense isnt there anymore.so you'll take a risk, but if its one that has to be made, then follow ur gut instinct. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muzikchick Posted July 20 Report Share Posted July 20 Is it necessary for your significant other to take away your desire to ever be with anyone else?exactly, exactly, exactly.....he should love me more than ale, for sure.if he don't, then he's not THE one, obviously....and if as the female, you are not the only one that makes him feel "king on top of the world" then you not doing it for him, either obviously....or maybe i'm too much of a romantist...fantacy....never could be, i think so. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
damelo Posted July 20 Report Share Posted July 20 He doesn't want to lose the chick. He wants to keep things progressing with her, but he also wants to have his fun during his youthful years, and later on settle down with the girl.Should he suffer because he found his dreamgirl too early? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
damelo Posted July 20 Report Share Posted July 20 well, how would you feel if SHE wanted to be with you, but 'go play the field' and keep you around during the process? you gotta look at it through the other perspective.Yeah, but I think that part of the agreement is that they BOTH get to play the field, not just one... I think he is willing to take that hit (of his girl making out with other guys) in exchange for a little action on his part...The reason I'm saying this is because I know a couple that were very serious but every thursday night they reserved for casual dating... no sex allowed... and now they are married and they are great together. I'm not saying it's a usual or likely scenario, but these people seem to have made it work, so...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blondboheme Posted July 21 Report Share Posted July 21 I think that I know what the guy is saying. He loves the chick, she's perfect, and he knows that they will be great together. However, he still feels like he has wild oats to sow, and he still wants the thrill of the chase that we all know so well. no no no no NO you just can't have your cake and eat it too!!!! one of my best friends is going through that very thing with her boyfriend since highschool, and i could kick his ass for it. i wanna tell him to break it off or start appreciating what you have. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tranzwhore Posted July 21 Report Share Posted July 21 if you are honest with each other and with the people that you date then this can work. it's called dating. except most people aren't honest about who they are dating and how many people they're dating and what may happen between them. but if both individuals are mature enough to agree, hold up to they part of the agreement and don't let emotions get the best, or should i say worst, a relationship could happen. good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muzikchick Posted July 21 Report Share Posted July 21 if it's your "dream girl"......then nothing else would seem appealing...that's that "dream" idea....why the need to keep comparing etc.?Whatever, I'm no one to talk at this moment...commitment phobe, that i am.good luck, hope it turns out well for you, if she doesn't feel the same about this "open" type relationship....she will be very hurt while your out gallavanting. "no sex"....yeah, in the heat of the moment, I'd like to see who adheres to that "rule"....hello, human dahlings.http://www.vip-condom.com/(so u can feel impotent, i mean important--while at it)just don't give her anything she can't return.....(healthwise)have fun, be safe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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