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no sleep gotta go to work


moidah

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i think the last time i slept was friday night and its...tuesday...been a little cokehead for the duration...worked lastnight but tonight there is no way i will be able to do enough blow to keep me up...tina is no friend of mine-dont like her-so what i want to know is...

from ya'lls personal expierence what legal stuff works best...

i have to answer three phone lines, book apts, keep track of staff, money, equipment and clientele.

right now i am moving slower than a snail over sand and my temperment could use a little lightening...add some cramps to that and a fucked up eye from some bitches umbrella last tuesday (fucking cunt) i want to kill ppl and pile up the bodies to go to sleep on.

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cool. i usually stick to the illegals for my uppers so i dont really know what works...tried redbull this summer working at a motorcycle rally and it did the trick but i was jittery and geeked feeling for like an hour and then the rip ppls heads off feeling. \

probably just gonna keep on keepin on with what got me this far...i'll check in later when im hallucinating and all cracked out. should be amusing/.

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i came in on time and have two of my favourite ppl here. got a delivery after dinner and its slow so i really dont have much to do.

and sure the tail end of a bender like this one you would think i would be maudlin and cursing my affair with the white devil...but quite the contrary-there is something gratifiying for me when i dont want anymore.

as to whether i think of stopping all together-more and more often as the years pass. i had this really great rational that there was only this one window in your life to get totally fucked up, live the rockstar life, (not rerfering to this weekend in particular) be completely decadent and have no remorse about indulging but *big breath in* i seem to get a little hazy on when that window ends...

and i would not call in sick because i was left over from partying. i go to work when i am supposed to, on time, and i get my shit done

now i gotta laugh at myself cause i wrote this like two hours ago and just now remebered to send it...and now im off to sleep.

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